Monday, April 04, 2011

Squirrel Week

Washington Post columnist John Kelly is clearly one of America's brightest journalistic lights. Yesterday, he kicked off #dcsquirrelweek to honor the noblest, bravest, nimblest, cleverest, and downright cutest beast roaming our planet. Mr. Kelly, you're doing God's work.



101 comments:

T.J. said...

Excellent work, tiny dictator.

rob said...

and a fine happy birthday to you, the teej.

Dave said...

hate those fucking rodents since they built a nest in my attic.

happy birthday, teej. you'll be happy to know i upped my taco count by seven last night. i will eat one hundred tacos in 2011, but will i eat 200?

Danimal said...

You can almost see his nuts.
A fine birthday may you have the teej

rob said...

danimal, you say hi to phil?

Danimal said...

More or less....
The thought probably bores most but watching those guys hit a golf ball close up and in person will never grow old.

T.J. said...

35 going on death. Yippee.

Mark said...

Happy Birthday to our doofus overlord.

zman said...

35 was when I really started to feel old. Congrats Teedge!

Shlara said...

Rob, you're the only squirrel I like. I'm losing a war with the squirrels in my yard--they have destroyed my teak patio furniture. Wish I could use a BB gun in my neighborhood.

And Happy Birthday TJ--welcome to the beginning of middle age!

rob said...

we have a squirrel with no tail who roams our fence line. we call him bob.

that is all. please carry on.

Marls said...

Happy birthy Teej. Halfway to 70 with a liver half way to 200.

Marls said...

Rob, do you live on the border with Cuba?

rob said...

you want bob on that wall, mark.

Michael said...

I own a pellet gun that was purchased with the sole purposeof ridding my attic of squirrels. Still didn't work. I hate those things. But Dennis and I did have a fun time drinking beers on chairs in the attic and waiting for the little buggers to pop their head out for target practice. Dennis actually got one. Surprisingly, his hand-eye coordination is a touch better than mine.

Oh yeah, happy birthday again to the Teej. We helped him celebrate in AC over the weekend by letting the Borgata take his (and the rest of our) money. Highlight of the weekend was the outlay of Jersey trash lined up to see David Guetta in concert.

Geoff said...

Happy Birthday TeeJay. May your first beer be a masculine beer, and may your post-lunch concealatory (not a word) mouthwash successfully fool your employer.

TR said...

I will put down beer #3 to check in and wish The Teej a feliz cumpleano. Am on day 4 of a 5 day family trip in FL. Sanibel and Captiva Islands are the bomb. Too bad we're staying in Ft Myers, not there.

It's our first flight vacation with the three year old and one year old. It has been exhausting, but we have snuck in just enough fun and sun to make it worth it. Staying in a gated community with a pool in our backyard and a tiki bar a quarter me away also helps.

TR said...

"quarter me" = a quarter of my penis length, or a quarter mile. Bushwick Bill's got nothing on me.

T.J. said...

I think you have one more eye than him as well.

rob said...

the ncaa realizes that i can't stay up late enough to watch the end of tonight's game, right?

and you anti-squirrelites can go fuck yourselves.

zman said...

No way! Shaka Smart snubbs NC State.

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb/news/story?id=6290035

zman said...

How many b's are in snubbs/snubs?

T.J. said...

What do you mean now way? That nc state job is shit.

mayhugh said...

Dave - by my caldulations (and if DSOD is up to date), you are averaging .47619 tacos per day. Which means by December 31 you should slide 174 tacos down your gullett. But you'll have to step up the pace to get to 200.

And what do you get if you break 200?

T.J. said...

Teej type bad

zman said...

Would you rather live in Raleigh and coach an ACC school or live in Richmond and coach a CAA school?

T.J. said...

I like you, so I'll be nice. Only a moron would coach a bottom dweller in ACC over an up and coming CAA school

T.J. said...

I like you, so I'll be nice. Only a moron would coach a bottom dweller in ACC over an up and coming CAA school

rob said...

biting tongue

Squeaky said...

So nice you posted twice.

Happy drink day to you TJ.

T.J. said...

I'll get you back on the Words with Friends kick

Marls said...

Wrong bald guy Rob, but you are right...I want Bob on that wall.

zman said...

Never let it be said that Teedge isn't nice. I would imagine that compared to VCU it's easier to recruit at NC State because of its conference, its history, its location, its academic legitimacy, its budget, and the greater likelihood that you'll get to play games shown on ESPN. I also imagine that at NC State you get new balls for practice, the ballparks are like cathedrals, the hotels all have room service, and the women all have long legs and brains.

Mark said...

Here's the problem with NC State. All the boosters and alumni VASTLY overrate their placein college basketball and the ACC. You're always going to be 3rd in your own area behind Duke and Carolina and often you'll be behind Wake as well. I don't think its nearly as good a job as it looks at first blush.

Something else to consider: Its often a bad choice for the hot mid-major coach du jour to take a power conference job with somewhat limited potential. If they aren't successful very quickly, they usually get run and end up at a worse job than they originally had. It happened to Dan Monson when he left Gonzaga for Minnesota and has happened to a number of coaches that left other mid-majors for places like Iowa (and others that I'm too lazy to look up right now) that have outsized expectations for their basketball programs.

Consider that my birthday gift to you, Teej.

T.J. said...

Didn't some dumbass midmajor dude fail at Iowa recently? Wait, before my Siena guy?

rob said...

mark has bingo. and increasingly, mid-majors are finding reasonably long-term success in investing in their programs. gonzaga and butler come to mind, as does mason (and if you don't think they're successful, ask their president how much $$$ and increased application rates their 2006 run created). butler's run will seem less and less mindblowing over the next 10 years.

Mark said...

I'm more and more convinced that Stevens is going to stay at Butler long term and build them into a Duke type power. Basketball crazy state, private institution, charismatic coach. Just makes sense, to me at least.

Dave said...

what do i get if i eat 200 tacos?

peace of mind that i have spent my time well in 2011.

teej, i remember when i was 35. i still had dreams then.

TR said...

If you are a top prospect in the state of Indiana, Butler is the better option today. Says as much about Kelvin Sampson's scorching of that program as it does about Brad Stevens.

rob said...

notre dame/a&m - who you got?

rob said...

olander stuffing the stat sheet

rob said...

if butler can't keep uconn off the boards it'll start to hurt them

Whitney said...

Mike Tyson would not like that remake of the Phil Collns classic.

TR said...

Olander also leads in this category: Zits on a Caucasian.

Whitney said...

Andrew Smith is missing several fingers tonight, looks like. But he did give a reacharound, so says Jim.

rob said...

napier is doing a terrific job on mack

rob said...

uconn's long jumpers are percussive

TR said...

Off topic, but I loved Buck Showalter running his mouth this spring and having his team start the season on a tear. Great job of telling his team to know they have a pair.

zman said...

That's White Oliander to you.

TR said...

We nerd more fouls and more missed jumpers.

Whitney said...

Excellent typo -- these guys are playing like W&M nerds. Ugliest half in recent championship game memory?

rob said...

or best defense?

rob said...

rock. fight.

Shlara said...

Mark--totally agree with you. Been saying that for weeks. Butler reminds me of Duke in the 80s, before they became the evil empire. That's the Duke I loved. Let's hope that Brad keeps his program powerful and humble.

TR said...

Terrible charge call. Yes it's good D, but it's ugly to watch.

UConn is lucky they're only down three.

rob said...

shlara, with great power comes great responsibility. ask the teej.

TR said...

Just to clarify, Natalie Portman just won an Oscar for Best Actress. Her next two movies coming out are co-starring Kenny Powers and Thor.

Whitney said...

Speaking of Duke in the 80's, HBO aired the Tobacco Road documentary today (in addition to the very cool Runnin' Rebels doc). Good stuff, but my favorite part was the comic relief in the form of the random Terps fan railing on Duke and its fans. "they're f-ing dorks."

rob said...

igor is dead. long live igor.

Whitney said...

If I'm a bank robber who watches movies, I never ever utter the phrase "one last job." It always turns into a shitshow.

Whitney said...

Wow. The CBS panel is echoing what we said about this hideous half, but more like an American Idol dais.

rob said...

defense is beautiful! this game is beautiful! remain calm! all is well!

T.J. said...

Natalie Portman would not escape

zman said...

Didn't mark make a knicks/heat comment about butler a few days Ago?

Mark said...

Most people have been so busy being in love with Butler that it's been easy to forget that most of their games are pretty fucking ugly. They do a great job defensively but they also foul, a lot. And quite often it isn't called.

Sorry. It's true.

Mark said...

Yes. I did. It's not just me though. I believe a few of us (Jerry, Teej, etc) had a similar conversation about Butler last year.

rob said...

it's totally true. happened against vcu. but it's also smart. play physical enough and the refs can't call everything - and the opponent isn't used to it.

T.J. said...

Nibody plays an uglier (re: fouls that aint called) game than Butler.

Kemba and Silence of The- might have issue in half two

rob said...

the rocks are insulted by me calling this a rock fight

zman said...

Does 3d tv really look like 3d? I'm doubtful.

Mark said...

I completely agree, Rob.

It's not only smart. It's hard. It's easy to foul. It's much harder to play physical, yet sound defense. They're well schooled.

T.J. said...

Brandon Knight thinks these dudes are terrible shooters

Mark said...

My eldest Pit Bull shares a first name with Brad Steven's daughter.

Mark said...

Or Stevens' daughter.

zman said...

Brutal irons in this game.

T.J. said...

So how 'bout that Shaka Smart?

Mark said...

7-41 is fucking atrocious.

rob said...

thunk. thunk. bonk. thunk.

zman said...

Butler is shootinv just over nine percent from two point range? And they're sfill in the game?!?

Shlara said...

Butler needs to change the qi/chi in this game to get those shots to fall.

And, I need help staying awake for "one shining moment"

I'm too old to stay awake for such a slow game.

Marls said...

While Stevens may be able to turn Butler into a basketball power, they will need to do two things to really reach Duke levels.

First, they will need to join a better conference. That will give them a better SOS and more margin for error. It will also hopefully provide them several rivalry games that are televised each year. Unfortunately, I doubt Indiana would be open to letting them into the Big 10. Maybe the Big East basketball conference that emerges after football blow up the big east.

Secondly, they will need to attract a smarmy, self-important, arrogant, douchie, delusional student body.

rob said...

lamb is corey brewer long

rob said...

dislike

Mark said...

Lamb is everywhere. So smooth. God, I hope he doesn't turn into Terrence Morris.

Whitney said...

Rob and Dave, this reminds me of that Nicks halftime footage from 1992. Unreal.

T.J. said...

8 for 49

rob said...

it is eerily reminiscent of that, whit. who has that tape?

T.J. said...

Worst title game I've watched (I skipped uconn/bosh)

Mark said...

You know Bosh didn't play in that game, right?

T.J. said...

Jack? Who cares.

VCU wouldve made this less of a bore-fest. Boo butler. Ead. Lmb.

zman said...

Donyell marshall looks like odb.

T.J. said...

After that Oriakhi board I'm going to bed

Fuck you uconn

Enjoy ur vacated title douches

T.J. said...

My head hurts.

zman said...

Sometimes I get worried that I'm not cut out for parenthood but then I read about idiots who let their kids buy SB rings with their college funds and I feel better:

http://sports.espn.go.com/chicago/nfl/news/story?id=6290024

T.J. said...

tiny, where is the Muffet McGraw feature I was promised?

rob said...

i'm at a restaurant eavesdropping/listening to a late-20s doughy white guy tell his boss about his dance battle hobby - popping, locking, breakdancing. it is awesome.

T.J. said...

Just come over to my table and say hi, dummy.

Danimal said...

Eating at whata burger today heh?

T.J. said...

danimal, we're all playing on the new post...

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