"...it felt good to be out of the rain..."DATELINE: San Juan, Puerto Rico. It appears we've located the Washington Generals of the horse racing world - it's a 9-year-old Puerto Rican horse named Dona Chepa. Yesterday the ancient brown mare finished last (shocker) in a six horse field at Camarero Racetrack (some call it the Yonkers Raceway of eastern Puerto Rico), resulting in the horse's 125th consecutive loss, which, according to the silly article I found on the internet, is the longest in horse racing history. I tried to call Tom Durkin to confirm, but he won't answer his phone (could be he's still mad at me over the "Travers Incident").
The track spokesman said Dona Chepa's loss jumps her ahead of the Australian horse Ouroene, who was a stellar 0-124 from 1976-83. HOWEVAH, and it's a big HOWEVAH, there apparently is no world governing body that tracks horse futility (can't we get the Elias Sports Bureau to track this? or maybe Howie Schwab?). Dona Chepa's ineptitude though does surpass all other known horse suckiness:
-The aforementioned Aussie failure
-Japan's Gloria Springs (0-106)
-North America's Thrust (0-105, North America)
-Britain's Quixall Crossett (0-103, Britain)
(Anyone else a bit surprised there's no French horse on this list?)
No one saw this coming - Dona Chepa comes from a distinguished line of champion racers, and was sent to all the finest private schools. Her debut on Valentine's Day 2001 was supposed to be the beginning of something magical. Alas, it was not to be. Once, in May 2003, Dona Chepa came in 2nd (there was much rejoicing). And, despite her apparent lack of any horse racing "skills", Dona Chepa has managed to pocketed $12,971 (the horse has finished out of the money a whopping 90 times).
Don't be sad for Dona Chepa or her trainer, dear reader. The article really lifts your spirit with this final note:
The last-place finish Wednesday wasn't a total loss for trainer Efrain Nieves, who received a plaque from the Camarero Racetrack to mark Dona Chepa's record-breaking streak.
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