Pele Did It First

While we eagerly await Day Nine of Gheorghemas, a brief interlude to acknowledge Pelé's passing. There are a great many wonderfully written tributes to O Rei spread across the internet, and I'm not qualified to match them. I'll just post this video, which I saw for the first time this week. It demonstrates in clear relief just how far ahead of his time the great Brazilian was - so many moves that became associated with the luminaries of later decades were things Pelé did first, and often decades prior.

Enjoy this genius, who showed what was possible. 

Pelé vinha do futuro, o MAIOR, MELHOR e não tem jeito.

Que vídeo foda. pic.twitter.com/C5oOI0TBIS

— memes futebolisticos. - vito (@Mfutebolisticos) November 20, 2021

Silly Walk It Off

As I sit and sip my coffee on this Boxing Day morning, I'm aware of the need to burn some of the many calories that come with the holiday period. I've got my normal outlets, but sometimes a body looks for variety. And lo and behold, something came to my attention that intersects absurdly well with the interests of the denizens of this corner of the internet.

According to researchers at Arizona State University, 11 minutes a day of walking in the manner of John Cleese's Mr. Teabag from the Ministry of Silly Walks is sufficient to meet the standard recommended weekly threshold for vigorous exercise. Seriously. They did a study and everything. Published it in the BMJ, a British Medical Journal.

It should be noted that Michael Palin's not particularly silly walk does not confer the same exercise benefits as Cleese's. So you may need to practice in order to get the proper amount of exertion. I think you're up for it.

So if you're looking for a new cardio regimen to start the new year, new you campaign, I think you know what to do. Silly, funny, absurd, and functional. Just like us.  

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day Eight

On the eighth day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me:

Eight People and Places In My Neighborhood

Seven books for reading (and one for burning)

Six splurges for Christmas

Five Good News Stories, courtesy of Shlara

Soon to be Four on the Floor

Three Habits Forming

Two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint, and

Two(?) dudes bested by Kazansky

I live in a classic small town, complete with a courthouse, and a quaint downtown with cafes, shops, bars, and local characters. My house is less than a mile from that downtown area. That proximity is a major benefit for us. Since we first moved to Leesburg 18 years ago this month, we've spent a great deal of time eating, drinking, and shopping in her little center. And now that we have a dog, I'm communing with my fellow townsfolk on a nearly daily basis.

One of the unexpected joys of having an active pup is the amount of time I get to spend exploring my area. Our lunchtime routine generally includes an hour-long amble through and around the downtown, largely because she's learned that there are friendly shop owners and residents who are more than happy to indulge dogs with copious treats.

And so today's Gheorghemas gift is a bit of a love letter to my home town, as told via a dog walk.

We live on a cul de sac, so I almost always let JoJo leave the house off her leash. She sniffskitters through the gate in the fence that marks the boundary between our property and the Catholic church that's our neighbor to the west. St. John the Apostle Catholic Church sits on 20 acres, which includes a large grass meadow that's perfect for an athletic dog to sprint around, chase squirrels and the occasional fox, and roll in deer shit.

Our usual move is to bound around the grass for a bit (she does most of the bounding, really) and then head to the edge of the church property to explore a wooded grove before walking along the church cemetery and heading into town. As soon as Jo gets her leash on, she's purpose-driven, making a beeline to Jock's Exxon. This is a relatively recent addition to our routine. I took my car there for a state inspection in October, and brought the dog with me. Turns out that Paula, the weekday clerk, is a dog lover. She stocks her counter with an abundance of dog treats, which she (too) generously doles out to the pups that come to visit her. Ever since that visit, Jo insists upon returning on a daily basis. Paula is country honest, and she's told me she won't remember my name, but she remembers Jo's. Can't blame her for her priorities.

We head to the Town Green after that so Jo can smell the smells, and then we duck down an alley that takes us to King Street, where we call on Stanley Caulkins. Mr. Caulkins was a local institution, owner of a downtown jewelry shop, former town council member, and one of the founders of Leesburg Executive Airport. He served in the Army Air Corps in World War II as a radioman and a waist gunner. Upon his passing in 2018, the town commissioned a sculpture of Stanley that sits on a bench smack in the middle of the most highly-trafficked downtown block. Jo likes to pay her respects.

Just a few storefronts away, the good people at Coldwell Banker Realty always put out water and dog treats for passing pooches, which Jo knows very well. So we stop by and wave to the receptionist as we get our biscuit. Got my eye on a little riverside house in West Virginia, too. 

We cross Loudoun Street at the corner where Delirium Cafe stands across from Leesburg Gourmet. If you dig good beer that's often hard to find, go see Dave at the latter. He's a gregarious dude who loves to talk about beer, and he'll pour you a sample of whatever he's got on tap. I've got a growler of Dogfish Head 120 in my fridge just rarin' to get consumed thanks to his good taste.

Just another block away, King Street Coffee's roasting a variety of terrific blends, and the hipster folks there are always friendly. It's a cozy reading/work spot on the days I need to get out of the house, but more importantly for Jo, they keep a stock of bones in a little jar outside the shop. Always a good spot for some conversation with the locals who sit in the rocking chairs outside the shop while I indulge Jo's food craving.

As we turn and head back towards home, the view looks something like this:

You can eat and drink at King Street Oyster Bar, The Wine Kitchen, Side Bar, Tarbender's, Rebellion (a new bourbon bar - much recommend), Echelon Wine Bar, Lightfoot, and a poke into a bunch of little art galleries, shops, and businesses. We always go to Brick and Mortar Mercantile next. In addition to having an eclectic mix of clothing, art, knicknacks (the more inappropriate and subversive, the better - last year I got an excellent placard for my desk that reads, 'I'm a Fucking Professional', and this year I'm asking for a gnome giving a middle finger or a bumper sticker that reads 'Be Kind. We're All Idiots' for Christmas), and housewares, the good people at Brick and Mortar love animals. So much, in fact, that they encourage dogs to come into the store to get treats (and they encourage humans to come in by offering free beer on weekends). The proprietor's name is Samantha (same as my wife), and she adores my doggo (like my wife, she tolerates me), who returns that feeling by drooling on the store's hardwoods. She's good people, even when Jo interrupts her trying to ring up a customer to beg for a treat.

We cross back over Market Street and enter the grounds of the Loudoun County Courthouse. The original structure was built on the same spot in 1758. The courthouse structure you can see in the picture below was erected in 1895, with numerous additions going up over the decades since. At present, a 92,000 square foot expansion is in progress which will dwarf the historic building. Jo doesn't care about that - she just enjoys chasing the squirrels that flourish on the campus.

Our final stop is just to the left out of frame at the courthouse complex. My friend Patrick retired several years ago after a career as a land-preservation attorney with the Nature Conservancy and got a master's in library science. He now works at the Loudoun County Law Library. As part of the library's public outreach program, they hosted an event a year or so ago that featured a pet-focused theme. They worked with a bakery that makes treats designed for humans and their dogs, and have stocked those treats ever since. And Jo found out about it, so now we see Patrick just about every day. Jo waits patiently at the door (as you'll see below) for him to notice her, and he and I have a chat while she gets her treat. Occasionally she'll go inside a do a bit of legal research. Small town living has its charms.

We wind our way back home, usually cutting back through the church property so Jo can run around a bit more. Our full journey (as mapped below) is about 1.7 miles. Jo gets her treats, and I get my steps, my fresh air, and a daily reminder of how fortunate I am to live in such a neat little town. It's a pretty good trade. I grew up an Army brat, and until my family moved into our current home, I'd never lived at the same address for more than 30 months. 

I might just get used to this.

Gheorghemas Interlude

 I am embarrassed to say I did not know this song existed:

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day Seven

On the seventh day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me . . . 

Seven books for reading (and one for burning)

Six splurges for Christmas

Five Good News Stories, courtesy of Shlara

Soon to be Four on the Floor

Three Habits Forming

Two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint, and

Two(?) dudes bested by Kazansky

I tried to use the artificially "intelligent" large language chatbot ChatGTP to write this post but the bot would not cooperate with my nefarious plan. 

First, I asked ChatGTP for a glowing review of James S.A. Corey's sci-fi novel Leviathan Wakes in the style of Donald Trump. 

No dice. 

Then I asked for a review of Blacktop Wasteland in the tone of the King James Bible. 

ChatGTP chastised me. 

It is not appropriate to write a glowing review of a book simply because it is written in the style of a particular text. Reviews should be honest and reflect the reviewer's own opinions and experiences with the book. In addition, it is important to respect the integrity and tone of religious texts, such as the King James Bible, and not use them for the purpose of promoting a book or other product.

Boo!

So I will write these the old-fashioned way . . . on an iMac, stored in the cloud, to be published digitally on a blog, with the assistance of Grammarly. 

Just like Gutenberg.

I should also point out I busted my first ChatGTP plagiarist yesterday. What a mess. He's going to fail for the quarter because of that stupid thing.

Before I get to the good stuff, I'd like to nominate a novel for the worst book ever. My friend Cunningham recommended it to me because I coach tennis. It is written by a very popular author, Taylor Jenkins Reed. I'm sure she's great at writing about other subjects, but Carrie Soto is Back is the worst depiction of sports I've ever encountered. 

All the details are in my podcast, titled "Carrie Soto is Wack". My wife actually called me while she was driving to tell me how much she loved this episode . . . and she's not one to dole out compliments. Now she thinks I should only make podcasts about books that are awful-- sort of like MST 3000.

I could go on and on about how bad this book is-- and I do on my podcast-- but the strangest thing is that the reviews of it are all positive. And it won the Goodreads Best Books of 2022 Award . . . in the Historical Fiction category. Fucking nuts. The only thing historical about this book is that it took place in the past. 

Now here are the books worth reading . . .

1. Leviathan Wakes by James S. A. Corey

If you like sci-fi, read this book (and the others that comprise The Expanse) and watch the show on Amazon. Great stuff. Realistic sci-fi that occurs within the boundaries of our solar system . . . until the proto-molecule rears its ugly head.

2. The Nineties by Chuck Klosterman

This is required reading for this crew. Klosterman reminds us what it was like to live in a time when it was okay NOT to know something, NOT to have an opinion, and NOT to care. From Waco to Liz Phair, this is a nostalgic trip you shouldn't miss.

If you are some weird youngster perusing this blog . . . you still might want to read this book, so you understand the irony of that Nirvana shirt you're wearing.

3. Lord of Misrule by Jaimy Gordon

One of the best sporting books I have ever read. The setting is a down-and-out horse track in West Virginia in the early 1970s; the book captures the language, the characters, the consciousness, the intrigue, and the grit at the inverse of Churchhill Downs.

I did a podcast on this one: "All the (not so) Pretty Horses."

4. Blacktop Wasteland by S.A. Cosby

Crime, racial division, and fast cars in rural Virginia. 

5. Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World by Cal Newport

I am currently conducting an experiment in digital minimalism. It's going well. This is one of those books that could change your life.

6. Ghettoside: A True Story of Murder in America by Jill Leovy

Jill Leovy uses one South Angeles murder to look at black-on-black violence in traditionally African-American enclaves like Watts and Compton. These places are generally under-policed and justice is rarely meted out. Leovy turns cause and effect on its head, proving that it's not because these places are inhabited by gang members that make them difficult to police . . . instead, it is because they have never been policed with much intensity and intent-- unlike white neighborhoods in the same city-- the denizens have learned to solve their problems outside the aegis of traditional authority.

The book might also change your mind about how gangs work (they are far looser and more disorganized than you might think) and how murders are handled when they are insular and comprised only of African-American men, and it will remind you that you often can't control where you are born and where you live.

7. The Extended Mind: The Power of Thinking Outside the Brain by Annie Murphy Paul

Since this post is all about the number seven, here are seven things I learned from this excellent book on learning and the brain . . .

1) We often use misguided metaphors to describe our brain-- it's not a muscle that grows stronger with exercise (Lumosity does not work) nor is it a computer that works the same in any environment . . . we are more like magpies, building from whatever is available in our environment.

2) We learn better when we are moving, not when we are still . . . as Thoreau said, "Methinks that the moment my legs begin to move, my thoughts begin to flow."

3) Whenever possible, it's good to offload information into the world-- smart people don't memorize everything, nor do they work "in their head," as Richard Feynman points out in the book-- the writing the math down IS the work . . . we should put as much information as we can into writing and charts and gestures and other people.

4) We need to make data into something real in order to understand it, into an artifact-- we need to make the abstract into something concrete.

5) It is good to alter our physical state before, during, and after learning-- this helps us remember and it helps us create.

6) We need to reembody complex ideas-- argue about them, teach them, and speak about them in real time. . . when a teacher lectures the class, emphatically gesturing, asking pertinent questions, and directing all dialogue, the person learning the most about the subject IS the teacher; the learners need to to do these things.

7) You remember things better when they are associated with props, places, and memory palaces.

Happy reading!

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day 6

On the third day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me:

Six splurges for Christmas

Five Good News Stories, courtesy of Shlara

Soon to be Four on the Floor

Three Habits Forming

Two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint, and

Two(?) dudes bested by Kazansky

Yeah, I know I did something like this last year.  Whatever, I'm a material girl and I like to splurge.

1. A Wrensilva record console

My grandmother had this big piece of wooden furniture in her living room.  It had a radio and a turntable and cabinet to hold records.  The record player could even flip the record when it got to the end.  I think she threw it out when she sold her house.  At the time it seemed useless but right now I'd like to have it.

I'm not alone in this regard and Wrensilva has the answer.  They sell hand-made wooden record consoles in three different sizes with modern accoutrements like Sonos and Bluetooth.  They are expensive and obsolete but oddly I want one (but I'm too cheap and don't have a place to put it).  Seems like a nice splurge for you vinyl fans out there.

2. A mechanical watch

I've said it before and I'll say it again: everyone should have a mechanical watch.  I understand why you might love the functionality of your AppleWatch or your G-Shock, or the ease of your quartz timepiece, but interacting with a little machine that keeps track of time through gears and a spring is just a great experience.  You can find good ones at any price point too.  zfamily vacationed in Switzerland this summer and while the distaff members went to an art museum to see a Picasso/El Greco dual exhibit, zson and I staggered around Basel, eating street meat and ducking into stores.  We found a Patek Phillipe dealer but it was closed (probably for the best if you've met zson) but next to it was an Oris dealer.  They gave us free water, iced tea, chocolates and ice cream (zson ate deeply from the ice cream fridge) and let us look at their wares.  Their best offering, in my humble view, is the Divers Sixty-Five with the gray ombre dial and light blue markers.  Yes, it would be cooler if it was the Divers Sixty-Nine.  Yes, Tiffany blue dials are way too trendy right now.  Yes, $2,400 is a lot to spend on a watch.  Whatever, go try one on you'll see what I mean.

Maybe you already followed my advice and bought a mechanical watch.  Is it a GMT?  You need that extra hour hand to track a second time zone!  You're a ramblin' man!  Pimpin' all over the world!  Magnum had one for Pete's sake!  You need a Zodiac Super Sea Wolf "Pan Am" World Time GMT.  Then you can not only tell time in two places at once, you can say "I don't like that Pan Am coffee ..." when people ask about your watch.

3. Some pants from Duck Head

I know you remember Duck Head, purveyor of chinos in the south in the 1980s and 1990s.  They're back, or at least someone bought the trademark and stuck it on some chinos.  And they're good chinos!  Not so slim that you look like you're wearing your girlfriend's pants, and not so baggy that you look like a slob.  zwoman got me some shirts and a jacket too.  You won't be disappointed.

4. A Meater

Meater is not the name of an app for casual sex, although it should be.  It's a wifi and Bluetooth enabled leave-in meat thermometer.  You stick it in your meat, then set it to a temperature on your phone.  It will tell your phone when your meat is ready.

5. A Donald Trump NFT

I'm kidding when I say you should buy DJ Trump's NFT's.  I'm not kidding about their existence, I'm kidding about buying them because (1) they're sold out and (2) he's a piece of shit.  They exist!  I will find the time to make a full post out of this, but for now I'll just say that being Trump is a license to print money--he sold all 45,000 of his NFTs at $99 a pop.  That's almost $4.5 million.  For NFT's like this, featuring Trump chipping out of a sand trap with a salami in his pants: 

Or this one featuring Trump in a superhero outfit that flatters his ripped physique:

The NASCAR NFT is particularly interesting.  He's wearing #47 either because he expects to win in 2024, or he doesn't want to take Kyle Petty's number.  That his racing suit says "TEXAS," not "FLORIDA" or "NEW JERSEY," has me scratching my head.  Or maybe I'm just scratching my head at this whole thing.

6. A WCSaGD for Mr. KQ

Mr. KQ was obliquely mentioned in an ur-WCSaGD post entitled "WWzD/Automotive Alphabet Aerobics: T is for Triumph, Alternatively Titled: WWzD, Mr. KQ Edition."  I know he has an emotional connection to TR6s but I didn't get into that at all.  However, this post partially birthed WCSaGD.

You are an awesome person if you're getting Mr. KQ a TR6 for Gheorghemas.  But if you want my advice, I'd consider something else for him.

I met Mr. KQ at Gheorghefest.  His hi-fi setup is legendary.  He's a little bit older and a lot cooler than me, although the latter is a low bar.  And speaking of bars, Mr. KQ knows beers.  He knows smooth jams to rock the party and the ladies, so he needs something that can hold a party or an intimate encounter.  And cargo room is useful in his line of work.

You should get Mr. KQ a 1977 Dodge Tradesman B200 finished in yellow over a beige and brown interior, powered by a 360 cubic inch V8 paired with a three-speed automatic transmission, with a body kit with a rear spoiler and front lip spoiler, a sunroof, side pipes, oval-shaped windows, swivel captains chairs, button-tufted and quilted vinyl interior panels, a bed platform, LED lighting, a refrigerator, a flat-panel TV, an aftermarket sound system, a mirrored bar, and wine bottle storage.

Have I ever gotten a WCSaGD more right?  Check out this den of iniquity:

Even the transmission is perfect--three on the tree with a surfer knob.  That's what you should get Mr. KQ for Gheorghemas.

Joy Personified

We make no bones about our affinity for scenes people experiencing joy. Words aren't really necessary for this one. Here's Andres Cantor, the legendary Argentinian soccer broadcaster, calling the moment La Albiceleste clinched the 2022 World Cup title:

Andrés Cantor, who moved to the U.S. from Buenos Aires as a teenager, calls Argentina winning the World Cup: pic.twitter.com/4PougSj1g7

— luffy (@vvsLuffy) December 18, 2022

That's the good stuff. 

This Week in Wrenball: OBX Dave Shows Us How a Pro Does It

Because the holiday season cannot be a ceaseless parade of joy and good cheer [and there's only two hours left in the World Cup], we check in with William and Mary basketball. 

Johnny O'Neil, modern-day Nathan Smith

The Tribe sits at 4-7 amid a week-long break between games for semester exams, about where outsiders expected, given roster makeup and non-conference schedule, with head-scratchers and WTF stretches outpacing glimmers of hope. The fellas predictably fell against ACC foes Virginia Tech, Pitt and N.C. State. They defeated rival and defending Atlantic 10 tournament champion Richmond, and they came up small when it mattered in losses to Navy, American, Old Dominion and Norfolk State. 

The early part of the season was always going to be a challenge for a team with 10 new players – five transfers and five freshmen. Six players skedaddled via the transfer portal after a gruesome 5-27 season. But in today’s college climate, one player’s escape hatch is another’s escort past the velvet rope. Coach Dane Fischer and his staff landed transfers from Pitt, Vanderbilt, Rice, Providence and St. Thomas (Minn.). 

Fischer told former Daily Press colleague and current Tribe athletic scribbler Dave Johnson back in October: “I love the way this team is starting to come together and compete. We've got a long way to go given the new bodies here, but I like the talent level we have.” 

Fischer is more enamored of the talent than many. The Tribe was picked eighth out of 13 teams in the Colonial Athletic Association, among the third or perhaps fourth tier in what appears to be a stratified league. Early season statistical evaluations are always sketchy due to differing levels of difficulty in non-conference schedules, but the Wrens are in the CAA middle in scoring offense and defense, field goal shooting percentage and field goal percentage defense. They presently lead the CAA in team 3-point shooting, but are third from the bottom in team free throw percentage (.655), a potentially troubling sign for a team with little margin for error. Four of the five starters in recent outings are transfers, the holdover being 6-9 junior Ben Wight. Eight players average between five and 11 points per game. Five players average at least 24 minutes per game, five others between 10 and 17 minutes per game. Nobody averages more than 28 minutes. 

It’s logical to figure that Fischer is sprinkling out minutes early trying to identify the best combinations and rotations, as well as giving guys some run in one-sided games. No telling yet if he will shorten his bench when conference season arrives or continue to go 10-deep. The Tribe has some size in Wight, 6-8 Pitt transfer Noah Collier, 6-6 wing Gabe Dorsey from Vandy, and 6-5 Providence transfer Matteus Case, along with 6-7 freshman wing Jack Karasinski. 

The most intriguing addition might be Anders Nelson, a 6-1 grad transfer from Minnesota. He was a four- year standout at D3 St. Thomas, where he scored more than 1,400 points, was all-conference and all-region and led the team to a pair of NCAA Sweet 16s. He’s presently the leading scorer at 10.9 points per game, and shoots 48 percent from the field and 46 percent from 3-point range. Decide for yourself if the fact that one of the team’s most effective players has a D3 resume’ is discouraging, or a sign that perhaps he was an undersell and could have been a serviceable D1 player all along. 

William and Mary figures to improve as players become more comfortable with each other, though the CAA’s upper tier is an unlikely reach, seeing as how most everyone else will also get better. Charleston is 11-1 and among others receiving votes in the AP Top 25. Heavy favorite Towson is 8-3, with a competitive loss to Clemson and Pat Skerry’s typical collection of athletes and inside muscle. UNCW is 8-3, with losses at North Carolina, UConn and Oklahoma, and a wealth of guards and wings. Delaware has two of the league’s best players in Jameer Nelson Jr., and Jiyare Davis. Hofstra returns CAA Player of the Year Aaron Estrada. 

Among William and Mary’s wild cards is Fischer. I’ve written in this space previously that it remains unclear if he can coach, or more accurately, how successful he can be in Williamsburg. He did well as a rookie head coach with a pro-caliber talent in Nathan Knight. The Tribe reverted to the mean after Knight’s graduation and during the pandemic, followed by last season’s face-plant. Pre-transfer portal days, the program’s model for success was built on continuity and player development, as it rarely attracts top prospects. Continuity and development are exponentially more difficult now, as younger players can more easily seek “better” situations and older players look for new settings. Coaches now have even more categories to confront when they spin the Wheel of Indigestion, with recruiting, re-recruiting players they already have, scouring the transfer portal, making sure that NIL opportunities don’t go full cash drop, in addition to the usual academics, administrators, boosters, youthful hormones, and the uncooperative 6-5 opponent who scatters your defenders all evening on the way to his next school. 

In brief, the Tribe’s season is a challenge. On the plus side, several teams in the expanded (bloated?) CAA appear to be struggling as well, so a 5-27 repeat is unlikely. On the flip side, the top of the conference is a steep climb, and its present inhabitants will remain. Given the Tribe’s current makeup and inevitable roster churn throughout the land, there’s no guarantee that we won’t have this identical conversation 12 months from now and for years to come. So by all means, doctor your egg nog to taste.

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day Five

On the fifth day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe Gave to Me

Five Good News Stories, courtesy of Shlara

Soon to be Four on the Floor

Three Habits Forming

Two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint, and

Two(?) dudes bested by Kazansky

Last month, the NY Times had an opinion piece entitled "The Sandwich Generation is Getting Squished," and I was like "I feel seen." (Side note, I had a similar reaction to this tweet, accompanied by a gif of this runway walk the month before)

I have several go-to coping strategies to manage the squishing: 1) grocery store bakery cakes where there's as much icing as cake in every bite, 2) funny, human, feel-good TV shows like Ted Lasso, Abbott Elementary, Never Have I Ever, Insecure, NBA on TNT Studio show, The Office and Entourage, and 3) Reading good news stories. 

For my job, I need to pay attention to the news. I'm also curious and someone who likes to be "in the know" so even if I didn't *have* to keep up on current events, I would do that anyway. I read a lot of news. Most news isn't good. So you really have to make an extra effort to find good news stories. 

I'm sharing five of my favorite good news stories from 2022 for Gheorghemas. And if you want to infuse some good news into your weekly reading, here are a few reliable sources: 1) Subscribe to the Washington Post newsletter The Optimist; 2) follow Upworthy on social media

If you need life advice, press two. If you need a pep talk from kindergartners, press three.

Hotline is overwhelmed with callers seeking words of encouragement from elementary school students

A college student’s project helped free his childhood friend from prison

Homeless teen heads to college, makes basketball team: ‘It’s like a dream’

Jeremiah Armstead’s coach is NBA legend Kenny Anderson, someone who understands struggle

A new country, a new baby, and the universal bonds of parenthood

An Afghan family’s daunting resettlement, and the local parents who want to help

A broke marching band parades on Capitol Hill to practice. Magic ensues.

Though the Eastern High marching band has long struggled to pay for instruments, uniforms and trips, it is a beloved and accomplished fixture in the community.

And, because it’s Gheorghemas (and you dummies can't seem to count), I have two bonus stories:

Bullies mocked his shoes. His friend, 12, got him a new pair with his own allowance.

‘Can I use my allowance, or you can take something away that I would get for Christmas?’ seventh-grader Romello “Mello” Early asked his mother.

Baltimore Museum Guards Take Seats at the Curators’ Table

A diverse and kaleidoscopic art exhibition, curated by 17 members of its security staff, spotlights the perspectives of employees typically seen but rarely heard.

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day 4

On the fourth day of Gheorghemas; big Gheorghe gave to me:

Soon to be four on the floor. 

Lots of changes happening in the Squeaky household over the last 10 months. New job for me, hence less time floating around G:TB. Wifer leaving her job of only a year. Better for her sanity. And our son who focuses on two things outside of the daily school grind; tennis and guitar.

As most of you know I would go see any musical artist once in concert because live music is a great escape for a few hours. And while most people see the Covid isolation behind us, we as a family still stay close to home.

But with Covid there were a ton of postponed shows over the last two years. I managed to amass tickets to eight shows, maybe should have taken day 8, and the concerts rained down like dollar bills over the last few months. Some were good but it felt so good to get back out there for that shared experience with a bunch of random people.

The Concerts

Mercury Rev opening for Brian Jonestown Massacre. Caught up with an old friend of Zman’s, JP, but missed Zman. Stupid mid-week show. He was missed. The Rev outplayed BJM.

OMD. Amazing light show and video backdrop. Sounded great if electronic new wave music from the 80’s is your thing.

Roxy Music. Highlight: back seeing shows with my cousins, who formed a lot of early music listening. These guys, Roxy Music, were old. I was among the youngest at this show. Did not know what to expect but they sounded good.

New Order and Pet Shop Boys. I have seen New Order five times. Their sound always seems to suck. Early on they were drunk and/or on drugs, now they phone it in. Pet Shop Boys completely outplayed them. They sounded great for an outdoor venue.

Gorillaz. First show for my son and his friend. Would recommend seeing them if you dig their music.

Yo La Tengo opening for Japanese Breakfast. Really went for Yo La Tengo but both acts were really good. I was definitely the oldest person at this show.

The Joy Formidable. Post punk Welsh band. Got to hang with the band prior to the show. Always a great show. Just bring your earplugs. For a three piece they are loud.

The Smile (Thom York from Radiohead). Went with my neighbor, visualize a tall Ned Flanders. We actually call him Okily Dokily. And another local friend who likes heavy metal music tagged along. This was going to be an interesting night either way with both of these in tow. 

But a low point turned into relief when a dude 15 feet from us had a medical emergency. Down on the ground not responding. Security revived him in front of our eyes and carried him out of the venue while my heavy metal friend filmed the bass player playing their bass with a violin bow unaware what was going on.

But I digress, Gheorghemas is about giving, So why four on the floor? My aspiring musical son currently has two pedals for his electric guitar. Thanks to input from Dave and Whit. Although I love music I am clueless when it comes to how all the equipment comes together.

Well, Santa is bringing him two more pedals, looper and compression ones. I will have to pretend the music is too loud in our house when my wife brings it up.

But the reality is, I am psyched to have him continue to string random riffs from different songs together and recognize the tunes. For example, Stairway to Heaven>Seven Army Nation>Blur’s Song #1>Fire on the Mountain>Smells Like Teen Spirit>Master of Puppets>Something in the Way.

Makes me want to pick up that bass guitar my wife gave me a few years ago and learn to play it. That is If I can get it back from my sons’ best friend who is the bassist in their “band”.

Merry Gheorghemas. I hope you all have a great end to the year.

Redemptive Tweeting

Just when I thought that Twitter was utterly and permanently compromised, something came along and just made me smile.

The simplicity.

The brevity.

The on-brand messaging.

The truth.

Perhaps a subtle statement about its very social media platform vehicle.

But mainly, the middle finger to all you bright, shiny, smiley do-gooders out there during this holiday season.

Trash

— Oscar the Grouch (@OscarTheGrouch) December 13, 2022

Love it. Carry on.

Sharing the Love

In the spirit of the season, allow me to highlight an organization that's doing really important and interesting work pushing back against the inexorable tide of money in youth sports. Said, differently, the very good folks at Open Goal Project are working to create opportunities in the game for disadvantaged kids in the Washington, D.C. area.

Open Goal Project was founded by Amir Lowery and Simon Landau, with the express mission to "create opportunities for young players from low-income families and underserved communities to access high-level soccer and grow with the game, on and off the field, to provide resources that empower those players and families to navigate the costs and overcome hidden barriers associated with playing, and to use soccer as a vehicle for cultural enrichment, higher educational opportunities, and greater life experiences."

Here's a little shoutout for the project from ESPN:

Amir played collegiately at Wake Forest and then in MLS and USL for nearly a decade before coming back to his hometown to start the project. He's an impressive dude. We have a mutual friend, which is how I learned about Open Goal Project. I connected Amir with the club I volunteer for, and we've been working on ways to create playing opportunities for the project's kids and their academy team, District of Columbia Football Club.

One of Open Goal Project's early success stories is Ariana Reyes, who's a rising redshirt junior at JMU. She played in 19 games as a redshirt freshman, starting 10, before missing all of last season. Here's a little bit of her story.

Open Goal Project has kids playing at several other colleges, kids who might not have had that opportunity without the work Amir, Simon and their team are doing. If you've got a couple of bucks you don't know what to do with, these guys could use it. They manage to do a lot with a little. I'm rooting for them.

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day Three

On the third day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me:

Three Habits Forming

Two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint, and

Two(?) dudes bested by Kazansky

According to research published in 2009 by Phillipa Lally of University College London, it takes an average of 66 days to form a habit. On November 4 of this year, external actors broke me of some bad habits I'd fallen into during the workday over the pandemic by freeing me from the 'work' part of the day.

Now, I'm trying to build some positive habits. In the interest of accountability, I'm celebrating Gheorghemas by letting you in on my journey while also contributing to the best of holiday traditions. 

None of these habits are particularly novel. I'd be willing to bet a lot of people want to build these muscles, and a bunch of folks already make a practice of them. I'm not an original, at least in this pursuit. But it's important to me nonetheless.

It so happens that the three habits have a chronological dimension in the context of my current daily schedule. Which is entirely of my own design and responsibility. I built a routine out of fear of spending the entirety of my unemployed period sleeping in, dicking around, and letting my mind grapes atrophy. 

That routine starts with waking up to my alarm at the same time I would for a normal workday. Then I walk the dog. That habit's been ingrained for a while, for both me and her. Gets the blood flowing and the brain engaged (I listen to NPR's Up First podcast while we walk).

Then, the first of the new habits: I work out (my goal is five intentional days of working out each week - not including long dog walks). I've been rotating Peloton cycling, weight, and yoga sessions with some degree of success. That workout plan was interrupted by Thanksgiving and then by COVID (which finally tracked me down after nearly three years of trying), but I still managed to hike and run before the virus laid me low. I've been back at it starting Wednesday. 

After I eat and shower, I make a cup of coffee, head to my office, and spend at least an hour on habit-to-be number two: I read. I used to be an avid reader. I'm no Hairy Dave, nor have I ever been, but there was a time when I'd go through books with some regularity. I've gotten away from that, and I'm working on it. In the past month, I've read Colson Whitehead's Harlem Shuffle, Jeanine Cummin's American Dirt, Salman Rushdie's Midnight's Children (thanks to OBX Dave's kind gift), and Gay Hendricks' The Big Leap ('cause I suppose I should be doing some self-education as I eventually look for a new gig). The early returns are positive - my morning reading has turned into afternoon and evening sessions, as well. 

When I'm done with my pre-noon reading, I turn to what I'm doing right now - my third prospective habit is writing. I spend an hour a day churning out content. Some of that is Gheorghe-related, which is a nice way to get the mind/fingers connection tune in. On the advice of the former Mrs. Hoopie, a good friend and an accomplished recruiter, I've also started writing some professional stuff, with plans to start building a content repository on LinkedIn. I'm not that sure people really want to hear what I have to say about authentic leadership, culture, and shitty management practices, but my sherpa thinks they do. 

This entire post, an excuse to post
a pic of this good pupper

I'm generally done with my habit-forming activities by lunchtime, when I take the dog out again - this time we go for a long walk, so I listen to podcasts like The Right Time with Bomani Jones, LeBatard and Friends' stuff, Men in Blazers, Futbol with Grant Wahl, 99% Invisible, and Week in the Tackle. Heavy on sports, especially footy. I suppose I should branch out, but one can only manage so many new habits at once.

Starting this week, I've dedicated afternoons to working on, well, working on. That's when I've been researching potential roles, industries, options, making calls to friends and former colleagues, burnishing my C.V., and all that. I'm not in a hurry, which is a double-edged sword. Figuring out the appropriate balance between urgency and selectivity is an ongoing back-of-mind exercise.

It'd be great if one of y'all could just win the lottery so we can build the compound and I can spend more time on my habits. Let's get on that.

Let's Go Bigotry!

Like many folks who are probably Too Online for their own good, I spend too much of my day angry at the world. I have no particular personal reason to be angry, which is obvious to me and those around me, and yet, here we are. 

I come by it honestly, apparently. My Dad was an outwardly hard gent. He had high standards for his kids, especially in terms of how we interacted with the world and how we treated others. He could and did give off an air of gruffness. Dude loved to laugh, to be sure - he used to drive my Mom crazy by sending me and my sister into paroxysms of guffaws (and he was sure to join in) at the dinner table. He had a sly, dry sarcasm that could be both witty and cutting. But man, did he have very little patience for fools, bullies, or charlatans.

Dad?

My aunt (my Dad's sister) cracked the code for me a few years after he died. Your father, she told me, was hard on the outside, but a marshmallow on the inside. He felt things deeply, but didn't want the world to know. Injustice and unfairness pissed him off. Given his chosen professions (military officer and high school administrator), his outlets for that anger in the workplace were limited. And because he was a man of a certain era, it wasn't socially acceptable to be as loudly obnoxious about thoughts and feelings as his son. So he mostly held it in.

He needed a blog, as it turns out.

All of which is a long introduction to the topic of the day (it's the topic du jour). Here's a thought experiment inspired by events in the news: what if we let bigots legally be bigots, at least in certain circumstances?

On Monday, the U.S. Supreme Court heard arguments in the case of 303 Creative v. Elenis. The plaintiff is a web designer from Colorado named Lorie Smith who seeks the right to deny services to same-sex couples who want custom wedding websites. (Pay no mind to the fact that Smith doesn't currently offer such services as part of her business - she's asking the Court for a preemptive judgment, permission to discriminate, as it were.) Per SCOTUSBlog's analysis, the Court seems predisposed to grant Smith's petition in this case.

I'm no legal scholar, so I'll refer you to the link above for analysis of the jurisprudence at work. But let's assume the Court finds for Smith and allows her to choose not to serve same-sex couples. So what?

Conservatives famously believe in the free market. In a scenario such as this where there are presumably multiple providers of web design services for weddings, why don't we allow the Lorie Smiths of the world their prejudice? Let the market decide - if you're comfortable working with a bigot (and there will be those who are), hire her. If you're not, choose a competitor. And we all spend less energy on this topic.

This approach obviously has limitations. If there's not competition in a specific product or service category, discrimination clearly harms the interests of the minority. And physicians, therapists, and other healthcare providers can't be allowed to refuse patients based on their biases due to proximate potential physical and mental harm. I'm sure the assembled giant hive mind will quickly identity other cases where this approach won't work. But why couldn't it in cases like the one in front of the Court.

It's said that sunlight is the best disinfectant. Rather than forcing bigots underground, why not allow them freedom of their beliefs, unencumbered by legal stricture? You get to serve the market you wish to serve. We get to call you on it and let the community know about your stance. Let the chips fall where they may.

I recognize that determining what services/products should be exempted from this laissez-faire approach to accommodation is a challenge. That's why we have a court system! (I'm hearing from my producers that the court system is a bit biased itself at the moment - that's a potential flaw in my proposal.) I further understand that mine is probably an unworkable approach for many reasons.

But what's the argument against the disinfecting benefit of sunlight? What say you, good people of Gheorghe?

Gheorghemas: Day Two

On the second day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me:

Two dudes bested by Kazansky

And two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint

Ancient Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius probably isn’t anyone’s first choice for a pub crawl. He kept his desires in check. He rarely overindulged. He often listened and observed, and he wasn’t one to simply pull rank. However, he would have been an interesting cat to sit with and have a beer and pick his brain – provided your high school Latin teacher could tag along.

Aurelius’ book, “Meditations,” is considered a classic of Stoic philosophy. It’s a work of reflection and intelligence that’s been discussed and has influenced people since it first came to light in the 16th century. Lofty stuff for what’s essentially a personal diary.

“Meditations” is part of the Stoic canon, but it reads more like a journal, the late night and early morning musings of a guy talking to himself, trying to figure it out in real time and mindful of his principles and the lives of others. Though Marcus was Roman, he wrote it in Greek, since Greek was the language of philosophy for educated Romans at the time and part of his own tutelage as a young man. That his writings lasted almost 1,400 years before they were first printed is a damn miracle.

Stoicism is no one’s idea of a good time. Stoic raves are a yawn. Ascetic amusement parks never caught on (no rides, just stand in line for 40 minutes and then move to the next line; precursor to the modern DMV). That said, the current interpretation of stoicism differs from its origins. Only in the past several centuries has it come to mean repressing feelings and being indifferent to pain and pleasure and joy and grief. The classic Stoics leaned on logic and rational thought and living an ethical life in accordance with nature as a path to fulfillment. They taught self-control as a means of overcoming impulses and passions. 

“Meditations” is divided into 12 “books,” which are more accurately chapters and are likely the construct of the earliest translators, as most scholars conclude that Marcus Aurelius scribbled for himself and never intended for his thoughts to be distributed or published. Entries are as brief as a single sentence, and as lengthy as several paragraphs expounding on a topic. It’s fewer than 125 pages; the introduction and footnotes and index in my edition are longer than his writings. It’s broader, more personal and more nuanced and in some passages, more poetic, than a typical scholarly philosophical work, which may be why it resonates.

Among the book’s many recurring themes and reminders are: 

Be a good person

“No, you do not have thousands of years to live. Urgency is on you. While you live, while you can, become good.”

Don’t sweat things out of our control

“Be like the rocky headland on which the waves constantly break. It stands firm, and round it the seething waters are laid to rest. ‘It is my bad luck that this has happened to me.’ No, you should rather say, ‘It is my good luck that, although this has happened to me, I can bear it without pain, neither crushed by the present nor fearful of the future.’ Because such a thing could have happened to any man, but not every man could have borne it without pain. So why see more misfortune in the event than good fortune in your ability to bear it?”

Chasing fame, wealth and sensory pleasures isn’t the wisest use of our limited time on Earth

“Take care not to be Caesarified, or dyed in purple: it happens. So keep yourself simple, good, pure, serious, unpretentious, a friend of justice, god-fearing, kind, full of affection, strong for your proper work. Strive hard to remain the same man that philosophy wished to make you. Revere the gods, look after men. Life is short. The one harvest of existence on earth is a godly habit of mind and social action.”

Leadership is a bear

“A king’s lot: to do good and be damned.”

Adapt

“If someone can prove me wrong and show me my mistake in any thought or action, I shall gladly change. I seek the truth, which never harmed anyone; the harm is to persist in one’s own self-deception and ignorance.”

A directed, rational mind is a source of strength

“Remember that your directing mind becomes invincible when it withdraws into its own self-sufficiency, not doing anything it does not wish to do, even if its position is unreasonable. How much more, then, when the judgment it forms is reasoned and deliberate? That is why a mind free from passions is a fortress: people have no stronger place of retreat, and someone taking refuge here is then impregnable. Anyone who has not seen this is short of wisdom. Anyone who has seen it and does not take refuge is short of fortune.”

We’re all works in progress

“All that you pray to reach at some point in the circuit of your life can be yours now – if you are generous to yourself. That is, if you leave the past behind, entrust the future to Providence, and direct the present solely to reverence and justice. To reverence, so that you come to love your given lot: it was Nature that brought it to you and you to it. To justice, so that you are direct in word and action, speaking the truth, observing law and proportion in all you do. You should let nothing stand in your way – not the iniquity of others, not what anyone else thinks or says, still less any sensation of this poor flesh that has accreted round you: the afflicted part must see to its own concern.”

Granted, the man wouldn’t be the life of a holiday party, but whether you agree with him or not he might be at least worth a listen the other 364 days of the year.

Gheorghemas, Day 1: WE BACK, BABY

The natives are restless, demanding the Day 1 post (in French, no less). Folks, it is officially go time once again on your favorite faux holiday...

On the first day of Gheorghemas

Big Gheorghe gave to me

Two dudes bested by Kazansky

Pre-Gheorghemas Coach Prime Filler

Funny how the littlest decisions can create connections in ways and places we might never have even contemplated. A year or so ago, a cheerleading coach at the University of Delaware decided that their squad didn't really need my kid. Today, my wife watched the entirety of Deion Sanders' introductory press conference as the head football coach at the University of Colorado. Butterflies in Africa, I give you indifference in Newark.

Also funny how many times things work out how they're supposed to, even if they're not what we thought we wanted. An essay for a different time, perhaps, the parallels between my daughter's collegiate decision-making process and my own. For the moment, let's just note that Boulder suits her down to the elevated ground. And it just got a lot more interesting.

Intercollegiate athletics at CU (not UC, mind you - this is Colorado, not California dontchaknow) are a weird animal. There are more than 33,000 undergraduates in Boulder, yet the school only fields six men's varsity sports (football, basketball, skiing, golf, cross country, and track and field). The women get nine, adding volleyball, soccer, tennis, and lacrosse. As a comparison, little William & Mary, with its 6,500 undergrads, fields a total of 22 varsity squads for women and men. At the same time, CU students are seriously outdoorsy, taking full advantage of the hiking, paddling, mountain biking, and skiing options in their back yard.

It strikes me as a place where athletics are fun, but not as encompassing as I know them to be at other major conference schools. Which is one of the many things that makes the Sanders hire intriguing.

Here's my bottom line: I think it's a good decision by both Sanders and CU, with a couple of pretty important caveats.

From Coach Prime's perspective, it's a move to a Power Five school, one he's certainly earned with his success at Jackson State. The Tigers went 27-5 in two+ seasons with Sanders as coach, just competing a 12-0 2022 campaign with an emphatic SWAC title game win over Southern. One might argue, as Pat Forde convincingly does, that the only reason Sanders didn't get a look from one of the more prominent major conference programs has a lot more to do with his pigmentation than his experience. Hugh Freeze, after all, got a(nother) shot.

It's also a move to a place with expectations that have been ground down by decades of mediocrity. The Buffs have exactly one winning season (excepting the 2020 COVID year) since 2005. The 2022 team finished 1-11, outscored 534-185 (last in America in points against, fifth-to-last in points for), and outgained 509-281 yards/game. It is no stretch to call Colorado the worst Power Five team in the nation.

Deion has very little to lose, and a lot to gain. As he said in his presser, "We’re coming to kill, not to kick it."

As for the Buffs, it's mostly upside there, too, so long as they have a plan. Colorado Athletic Director Rick George is staking his own professional reputation on the move, and in the press conference introducing Sanders on Sunday, he was unequivocal, saying “Everybody said let’s go all in. It’s time to GO ALL IN!” Emphasis entirely his - dude was amped. His future and Coach Prime's are inextricably linked.

I think Sanders will do really well. As noted, he starts with a low bar. He's a proven recruiter already, having convinced national number one recruit Travis Hunter to spurn Florida State for FCS Jackson State. And in fact, in the hours since his formal introduction in Boulder, Sanders signed four-star wideout Winston Watkins, Jr. from Fort Myers, FL. I expect him to get strong interest from kids in the transfer portal, as well. His son Shadeur had two impressive seasons as the starting quarterback at Jackson State and will join his father at CU. The influx of talent alone will be enough to make the Buffs a .500 program in Prime's first season.

And I think Colorado will do really well. As one of the reporters at Sunday's introduction noted, there hasn't been this much buzz around the Buffs' program in decades. My wife, who knows fuck all and cares less about college football, watched the press conference and has been looking for tickets to the 2023 home opener against Nebraska. Deion on campus will give the school an opportunity to build on a solid brand, raise money, and at the very, very least put a scaffolding in place that raises the floor for the next coach.

That right there is where George should be focused. Nobody in Boulder should be thinking that this job Sanders' final stop. If he's got a winning record after two seasons, he'll get looks from the places that should've talked to him this go-round. George should already have a list of coaches who could succeed in Prime's substantial wake - the next guy would need to be thick-skinned, creative, able to recruit, and willing to build on someone else's legacy. And if we're thinking strategically and being honest, he should probably be black - that's kinda what Deion's demanding, just not in so many words. 

Emmanuel Acho has an interesting perspective on that, and a riposte to those who would call Prime a sellout for investing so publicly in the HBCU football experience and then moving to a non-HBCU program:

To those saying Deion Sanders is a sellout, consider this… pic.twitter.com/UqUZRjOwF7

— Emmanuel Acho (@EmmanuelAcho) December 4, 2022

In the final analysis, I think CU's hiring of Coach Prime will turn out to be a mutually beneficial transaction. As long as the Buffs side of the table understands that it's a transaction, it'll work out for everyone. Prime's coaching journey won't end in Boulder, but if CU plays it right, his stop amidst the Flatirons will go down as a vital turning point.