The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day Six

On the sixth day of Gheorghemas:

Big Gheorghe gave to me…

Six old and new musical experiences

Five roadsters you can and should buy right now

FORE! An overdue update on LIV & the PGA Tour

Three Ways of Coping

Stories from two three strokes

And much needed hip-mo-bili-ty

Music is what cures the soul, at least for me.The ability to go put a record on the old turntable (or fire up Spotify) and just mellow out after a stressful day or week is my usual form of therapy these days. This year I got to check out 13 shows. 

As most of you know I have an eclectic taste in music. Six of the shows had something different going for them than the other ones, except for the Swedish death metal band I took my son and a few of his friends to.

Started the year off with seeing Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit at Radio City Music Hall with some Lammies (Zman, Juan Carlos, AReed) and a friend of AReed’s. The friend did something I had not witnessed at a show before. When we got to our seats he took off his sandals and did not put them back on until the end of the show. He repeatedly went to grab beers and hit the restroom during the show in his socks. But whatever floats your boat. First time seeing Isbell. Great show with great friends.

The next two shows brought back memories of one of my favorite shows from our college days, Primus and Fishbone at the Boat House. Two different shows this year but each show had a bonus. First up was Primus playing with A Perfect Circle and Pussifer. Awesome show where the bands would play 4 song sets and then switch to the next band. This repeated three times. The stage had all three drum kits setup on an elevated stage with lounge seating for the other bands to hang out and listen while the other bands played. Primus still has the goods. If you look closely at center stage you can see Les Claypool wearing a pig mask playing upright bass for the final song where all three bands were on stage together.

Second show was Fishbone opening for Madness. I did not have this show on my radar but you know who did, Whit. He happened to be in town for a day or two and thankfully dragged me out to see the show. It is always great to hang out with Whit. Show was good. Madness was on point and can still bring it. There was this musical interlude before the encore.

Funny thing is the family already had plans to see the Red Hot Chili Peppers in VA Beach for our son's 16th birthday. Why RHCPs? Son’s favorite guitarist happens to be the man in the band. Fun fact, I first saw them back in 1989. Never thought a child of mine would want to see the same band I saw 35 years before. And based on the bands use of drugs, never thought they would make it that long. 

Since the show was in VA Beach I knew I would see Whit prior to this show. But it was great to have E and him join us, although sitting in the parking lot for an hour to get out of the lot was painful. Two shows with Whit! RHCPs still sound good 35 years later.

Next show was a change up from the usual rock, punk, funk wheelhouse of mine. I went full bluegrass and took a flyer on Billy Strings. His band was not a typical band setup, he played without a drummer and the drumming beat was not missed. Great show, great long jams. You got to go and see him if you get the chance.

My son has been spoiled when it comes to seeing concerts. He has seen bands at big venues or festivals. I kept trying to get him to go see shows at smaller venues but always got the teenager “I am too cool to go to a show with the old man” push back. I finally got him committed to two small venue shows.One pushed to next year (J Mascis aka Dinosaur Jr. fame) and the other is a post-punk band from Leeds, Yard Act. I had been wanting to see them after the first album but missed the chance.

I had no idea what to expect but the 7 piece band delivered in the cozy 500 person venue. They were loud and full of high energy. It is not too often you see back-up singers dance in unison as part of a post-punk band. But it worked and got him to see the light on how awesome small venue concerts can be.

The last show of note I will bore you with was MJ Lenderman & the Wind. If you like dad rock with some pedal steel guitar and extended versions of the songs, then jump on board. Hell, Rolling Stone Magazine ranked it their third best album of the year. Another small venue show that rocked.The extended jams scratched my jam band itch while still giving off the indie rock vibes. It might be hard to see him in a small venue going forward but worth a flyer if you have the time. It will be interesting to see what happens with his primary gig with the band Wednesday, another indie emo darling.

Back to that Swedish death metal band, Opeth. I have never seen a death metal band, so I wanted to see how bad the GA section would be. Turns out the upper balcony GA section at the venue only had seats and everyone sat through the whole show. Not very death metal to me.

Maybe we need to have a G:TB concert outing. Someone pick a show. Or just go see a local show. It is good therapy. At least for this guy.

Merry Gheorghemas!

Z-Man!! . . . . . . (Not Zman!!)

We bring you, without prejudice...

For your viewing pleasure, or pain...

You're traveling to another dimension -- a dimension not only of sight and sound but of feeble mind. A journey into a strange land whose boundaries are that of weirdness and twirling around goofily with crazy eyes and slapping a conga. 

That's a signpost up ahead: your next stop: Gheorghe: The Blog, specifically, the music videos of our roster members' namesakes.

Without further messing around, enjoy:

The Z-Man* Experience!

*this has nothing to do with our Zman

Great Moments In Local Advertising (NY/NJ Metro Edition) - A zman and Marls Joint, Alternatively Titled "Marls and zman's personal Chinese Democracy"

You've been waiting years for this one and now seems like the time to let it rip.

A recent G:TB comments discussion involving the classic Jhoon Rhee Tae Kwon Do commercial (featuring FoG:TB Chun Rhee delivering the now famous "Nobody bothers me either!" line) prompted Zman and me to go down a rabbit hole of local ads from our childhood in the NY/NJ metro area.

zcommentary is in blue.  I had a blast exchanging these vintage ads with Marls.  We dug up some serious gems.  It started as a 10 Best list so of course it now has something like 12 entries.

The Nevele:

This was a great pull by Marls.  I recognized the song the minute the beat dropped, and it's a pretty bangin' disco beat.

Mount Airy Lodge:  Have a fling in the spring in the Poconos!

The Nevele reminded me of another resort commercial, beautifuuuuuul Mount Airy Loooodge.  Although the Nevele had the harder beat, the Mount Airy Lodge ad makes it clear that it's the place for lovers to make their lovin'.

Children's Aid Society:

Hands down my favorite pull of the text exchange, Marls always adds value.  I recognized every second of this ad, including the girl who starts singing poignantly at the 0:30 mark, because I used to get psyched when it came on.  It made me wish I got some children's aid and it still swings.  No idea why no one combed their hair before filming though.

Coronet Baby Furniture:   This one features the tag line "no talking orangutans" which Z mentioned in the aforementioned Jhoon Rhee discussion.  TR and I may have been the only ones to pick up the reference, but nevertheless, these commercials are classics.  Low production values, porn staches, and cheesy outfits all scream Long Island in the mid-80's.  Um, when was the last time you went to the Island?  There are plenty of guys out there with the same staches and Mets Starter jackets they were rocking when this ad first aired.

Grand Hotel (aka TWICE MORE!!!):

Another gem.  Every class evaluation I wrote at W&M included "I loved it, I'm going to take this class two more times as soon as I get tickets, my husband works in the area."  I guarantee no one got the joke and I still don't care.  I bet this lady knew Doris from Rego Park (but probably not Sapphire, the hidden jewel of the Bronx).

Tommy Tunes:

Undoubtedly my best pull.  Tommy Tunes was the place to go in Bergen County if you were looking to pimp your ride in the 1980s/90s.  The woman in this ad is the epitome of North Jerzy beauty circa 1989.  Marls was so taken with this commercial that he found himself deep in an internet wormhole researching the guy who owned the store.  

Sasson Jeans (Featuring the NY Rangers):

Tight designer jeans, late 70's hockey hair, a disco soundtrack, synchronized skating, off key singing and awkward hand gestures made this ad an instant favorite.  In fact, the slogan "Ooh La La" became a nickname for Ron Duguay - the ranger with the longest hair in the ad.  In his second season with the Rangers, Duguay parlayed his new sex symbol status into relationships with Bianca Jagger, Cheryl Tiegs, & Kim Alexis.  

In related noos, they NY Post is now reporting that Ooh La La is now dating Sarah Palin.  Oh la la how the mighty have fallen.

I remember this one too.  Bamberger's!  Marls will always take an opportunity to dump on the Strangers to the Cup.

The Money Store:

We couldn't do this post without at least one spot featuring Phil Rizzuto for the Money Store.  And how about these interest rates?

Crazy Eddie:

We couldn't do this without Crazy Eddie either.

And nobody beats The Wiz!  This was a great place to buy stuff that fell off the back of a truck, or that was stolen off the back of a truck, or that was old and used but presented to the buyer as a "floor sample."  I bought one such deeply discounted "floor sample" at The Wiz in Paramus, a Yamaha pre-amp for the Unit M stereo (why the hell did we have a Carver amp with no pre-amp?) that survived for maybe two months before self-destructing.  More importantly, their jingle inspired Biz Markie.

Newmark & Lewis:

Seaman's Furniture gets the nod because (1) "See Seaman's first!" was ubiquitous even if no one particular ad is memorable, and (2) it provides context for Phife's line "Bust off on your couch now you got Seaman's Furniture."  Perhaps they're affiliated with Dr. Seaman from a previous post.

Remember When Life Was Simpler and We Could Live Dangerously?

Back last September, Zman and I found ourselves on the same flight from Newark to Tokyo. It was unusual. And it allowed me to take one weird stalkerish pic.

As he may (or may not) remember, the flight's wifi crapped out on us. This is a suboptimal turn of events on a 13-hour flight. So I had to hunker down and dig into my meager Netflix downloads. But I did not like Bloodline, even though I've had a crush on Linda Cardellini since her Freaks & Geeks days. So I started perusing the movie selections on the flight.

You take a different mindset when you are alone on a flight with no responsibilities for the next ten hours. You're essentially looking for mindless entertainment. The screen is small and the audio is poor, so you don't want to have to think too hard. On recent flights, I dug into Deadpool and the newest X-Men movie. They were both fine. But I couldn't find one to tide me over...until I found Johnny Dangerously.

In the early days of HBO, they seemed to have ten movies on replay over and over again. I saw The Outsiders and Red Dawn about a million times. And Johnny Dangerously was in that mix as well. It's important to remember how iconic that move is. It ages fantastically.

Here are my seven favorite things about that move, which, at 34 years old, is older than my future second ex-wife.

1. Michael Keaton - god damn, he had his comedy fastball working in this. He was great. It's nice to have him back around these days.

2. This was Dick Butkus' second greatest acting effort after his role in Hamburger U.

3. Raymond's dad played a mafia boss and it made sense at the time. Rest in peace, Peter Boyle



4. Weird Al did the opening credits song. This was before his meteoric rise to fame from Eat It, although I will fistfight with any man, woman or child who denies that Rye or the Kaiser is his best tune.

5. Your Testicles and You. Still epic.



6. There are some tremendous cameos in this movie: Mr. Hand, Taylor Negron, Dom DeLuise and Chuck Woolery, to name a few. That's a random group of 80's name that have zero resonance with the millennials.

7. Roman Moronie. Holy crap is he the best. The actor who played him (Richard Dimitri) did very little of note before or after this movie. But he hit it out of the park with this role.

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day 4

On the fourth day of Gheorghemas, big Gheorghe gave to me:

Four legal mic drops 
Three woodland animals and a cool little otter
Two names
A fat guy in a jer-sey

Gheorghe: The Blog makes no apology for our historical focus on whimsy and our generally self-serving editorial output. But lurking below the surface mix of filler, inaccuracy, and navel gazing is a consistent thread of  professional and personal expertise. Put more simply, one of my favorite things about being a part of the G:TB community is the fact that I learn things on a regular basis.

In recognition of that, a big Gheorghemas huzzah (the official G:TB exclamation of the season, along with 'Hi, Gheorghies!') to zman, who staked his claim in 2013 as the internet's leading authority on the intersection of rap and the law.

To be sure, Z'd done good work on this topic previously, raising awareness of Jack Urbont's legal beef with Dennis Coles (d/b/a Ghostface Killah). But his efforts this year cemented his place in Super Lawyers' list of the industry's top purveyors of legal wisdom. (Don't bother searching for him, though, his modesty requires that his name not be included - he's a bit like a superhero in that way.)


Method Man - The Turn by mastho50

After spending the first part of the year focused on legal issues unrelated to rap (and automobile porn), Z turned his considerable analytical acumen back to dropping science in July. In the first of several cases involving the Beastie Boys (who seem to be the target and instigator of quite a bit of litigation - news for crews who'll be sucking like a leech, I suppose), Z noted the dichotomy between Judge Paul A. Englemayer's incredibly distinguished resume and his complete lack of understanding of the rap game:

Monster asserts the defense that "Hey, we thought it was ok to bust the Beasties' loops, Z-Trip said it was dope."

Honestly. That's what they told Judge Engelmayer. More specifically, they told Judge Englemayer that "Mr. Sciacca said 'you can use the music on my website.' That was a separate contract, [then Monster asked] do you approve? And he wrote back, 'it's dope.'"

At which point the learned judge said "It's dope?"

Z-Trip's lawyer explained “It’s dope means it’s good. He says, ‘well they showed me this video and yeah, it looks good. They say ‘oh, that gives us permission to use all this music.' But there’s no contract between my client and the Beastie Boys.”

To which Judge Engelmayer replied, “I take it on a summary judgment motion that I have to treat ‘dope’ in the light most favorable to your client." I'm not sure if His Honor realized how funny that quip is. You probably don't either, particularly if you didn't take civil procedure. But trust me when I say it's a hoot.

The persistent Mr. Urbont reappeared in the pages of G:TB in August, as Z chronicled the latest in the ongoing legal saga. In a noteworthy programming update, discovery for the case is scheduled for completion in February 2014. We eagerly anticipate Z's pre-trial analysis.

Judge Alison Nathan stands in sharp contrast to the aforementioned Judge Engelmayer, in rap-world knowledge, though not professional achievement. Z praised her skillz in September, acknowledging both her definition of 'MC' in a footnote, and her obvious affinity for G:TB. (As an aside, as courts across the U.S. have increasingly cited online materials in their opinions, the challenge of 'linkrot' has arisen. For this reason, we'll have to keep G:TB alive in perpetuity, as it seems next to certain that Judge Nathan will cite Zman's work in relatively short order.)

Finally, just a few weeks ago, Z weighed in on yet another Beastie Boys-related legal matter, siding with the makers of Goldieblox in their minor kerfuffle over the fair use of the former's 'Girls' in an advertising campaign. Notes Z on the band's standing policy of not licensing its music for commercial purposes, "While I respect that position, MCA's will doesn't override our copyright laws." (That right there may well be the legal reasoning cited by Judge Nathan at some point.) That Z applied legal principles in a way that supports Goldieblox over the legendary rappers on serves to strengthen his position as a neutral arbiter of legal flow.

Beyond issues of the law and rhyme-spitting, Z also weighed in on judicial misconduct, the Redskins' trademark, and Congressional claims of court-packing this year, a banner annum for legal productivity. (Here, anyway. I guess he ought not submit this post as a part of his performance review.)

As Method Man might say on the occasion of this, the 20th anniversary of 'Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers)', "Respect when a grown man is speaking".

The Boundless Influence of Gheorghe

For such a seemingly inconsequential little filler/dipshittery purveyor, Gheorghe: The Blog has made an outsized impact on the larger world. As Clarence has repeatedly pointed out (via the comments section, naturally, so there's no link I can use to prove the notion), the editors of Grantland routinely scour G:TB for new ideas. And it's pretty obvious that we turned Sports Illustrated on to Elena Delle Donne's greatness. A whole anti-CERN cottage industry has sprung up around our coal mine canary efforts regarding the Large Hadron Collider.

After those and other influential campaigns, we've turned our efforts to a far more fundamental pursuit. We're changing math.

In partnership with Briton Rob Eastaway, our very own Zman has pioneered an entirely new way to think about computation. Friends, we give you zequals ().

Let's allow Eastaway to offer a description:

Zequals means you have to reduce any number to a single significant figure, followed by Zeroes (so the Z is for Zeroes, and also for the ZigZagness of the symbol).  For example 67 becomes 70, and the calculation 7 x 8 = 56 becomes 7 x 8 60.

Ultimately, zequals is extremely valuable when precision is less important than general directional sense. If we need to know roughly how many cans are in 18 cases of beer, 400 is good enough. If I need to figure out whether my kid's 98.8 degree temperature requires a trip to the doctor, 100 is probably a bit imprecise. But as Eastaway himself notes, "Many people develop the knack of estimating when they discover a real need for it: business people assessing the viability of a project, engineers looking at how long a job is going to take. In these examples, it’s the ballpark figure that’s important, not the number to its third decimal place."

Eastaway explains the concept in more detail in the video below. And while he doesn't credit Zman, we'll not take offense. We all know the truth, and that's good enough for us.