Sunday, January 01, 2023

12 Days of Gheorghemas: Day Nine - Nostromarlsus

On the Ninth day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me:

Nine (semi) Bold Predictions for 2023

Eight People and Places In My Neighborhood

Seven books for reading (and one for burning)

Six splurges for Christmas

Five Good News Stories, courtesy of Shlara

Soon to be Four on the Floor

Three Habits Forming

Two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint, and

Two(?) dudes bested by Kazansky

Soooooooo, day 9 of Gheorghemas is a bit late.  Chalk it up to too much Gheorghemas cheer or maybe laying low and recovering after the airing of grievances, but I have been derelict in my Gheorgemas duties.  (Not Whitney day 12 in March derelict, but derelict nonetheless.)  I considered tweaking the post that Zman and I have been working on for a while (our Chinese Democracy, as pointed out by Clarence) but that felt like the easy way out.   No, instead I decided to roll out an old, hackneyed year-end standard of columnists the world over... a list of predictions for the coming year. 

I make no guarantees on the veracity of these predictions, but I did consult a Magic 8 Ball to assist in my prognostication and I wore a robe while typing this.  Eat your heart out, Nostradamus.   Without further ado, nine predictions that might, totally come partially true in 2023.

1.    The Mets Will Not Win the World Series:  Ahh, some chuckle and say, "way to go out on a limb, Marls."  The Mets have not won the World Series since Reagan's second term and they have a history of making their fans miserable.  However, you may have missed that the Mets just spent $800M this offseason in a win at all cost effort.  At MGM, the Mets and Astros are now co-favorites to bring home the hardware. Don't believe it.  The Mets now have more pressure than maybe any team in MLB history to win.  If there are two things that don't go well together, it is Mets & pressure.  If you need a reminder, just pick up a copy of "The Worst Team Money Could Buy".  I hope I'm wrong, but I'm not.

2. George Santos Is Going to Bring Down DJT: For anybody that has not been following the story of Congressman elect George Santos, it is BAT SHIT CRAZY.  The Cliffs Notes version is that this guy won his Long Island district as a Republican in a mild upset this fall.  However, it has now come out that he has lied about EVERYTHING.  We all know politicians lie, but this is crazytown shit, including how a former call center employee who lived in a dumpy apartment in Queens made his money, which he originally claimed was from his time at Goldman Sachs (psst...he never worked there).  This is important, since he went from having almost no net worth according to a 2018 campaign filing to over $1M in 2020, including $600K that he "lent" to his most recent campaign. He now claims that money came from the reselling of luxury goods.  Where these goods came from, nobody knows.  The problem here for George is that the IRS is likely to ask a few questions about that income.  It's how they got Capone and methinks George might have some splainin' to do.  In reality, it feels like someone wrote him a big check that was sent to his consulting firm created in 2021 in order to skirt campaign finance laws.   Whose organization would be dumb enough to write such a check to a mediocre candidate who claims to have attended the Jan 6th "Stop the Steal" rally?   I'll let you be the judge.  The Republican establishment (as well as Rupert Murdoch) already have knives out for DJT; if he is connected to Santos (IRS investigation anyone), it may well be lights out. Et tu, George? 

3.  Joe Biden Will Announce That He Isn't Running in 2024:  I like Joe Biden, I voted for Joe Biden... Joe Biden is 80 years old and has clearly lost his fastball.  He is not the doddering old fool Fox News personalities make him out to be, but he has struggled, if we are being honest, and that is not going to get better.  We have real problems in this country that need strong leadership.  Inflation is not going to get better anytime soon.  The economy has structural headwinds that are going to be tough to overcome.  As DJT continues to fade, the appeal of Biden will, too, and the party will look for a graceful way to usher him off into retirement.  

4. 2023 Will See The Return of the G:TB MaxiSummit:  Whit and Mark hinted at it in the comments a few days ago, but 2023 will see the return of a non-OBFT MaxiSummit.  Experts continue to argue over what constitutes a MaxiSummit, but this author defines it as an event where at least 5 G:TBers or FOG:TB gather for beverages and buffoonery with at least some traveling from over 50 miles.  Outside of OBFT, there have been a few Chatham NJ Maxis, Gheorgefest and Teej's nuptials, but it has been too long - fuck you, Covid.  2023 is the year we correct that.  Jazz Fest anyone?

5. Twitter Will Not Declare Bankruptcy:  Elon Musk is an overgrown man-child who let hubris and ego drag him into a bad debt-laden deal.  The chattering pundits who really hate Elon are predicting the demise of Twitter based on looking debt and cashflow alone.  That ignores Elon's own wealth, which can float the boat for a while.  The same ego that led to this deal will keep it afloat this year.  Twitter may go down in flames over time, but it ain't happening in 2023.    

6. TR Will Return To G:TB: This may be wishful thinking on my part, but this place is not the same without his discussion of Jets futility, frustration about W&M men's soccer, and nasal polyps.  I think TR is itching to come back, maybe even lurking waiting for an opportunity.  Plus, if we have a MaxiSummit,  who else am I going to share a damp pullout couch with?  

7. Someone Will Buy Their WCSAGD Car:   I really want it to be Mr. KQ. 

8.  2023 Will Mark The Return of "Hi Gheorghies": Covid has been receding over the last year, some of you are becoming empty nesters, others have college aged kids to visit...the time is ripe for the return of G:TB after dark.   I expect more traffic after midnight around these parts this year along with the requisite "Hi Gheorghies" - except for Dave who will post it at 9:30 on pub night.  Speaking of Dave...

9. Dave Will Cross Promote His Other Blog and Podcast In a Post On G:TB: I did not even consult the Magic 8-ball on this one.  The sun rises in the east and sets in the west.  At least I'm guaranteed to get one prediction right.   

Happy New Year, Gheorghies!

30 comments:

Dave said...

thanks for explaining the george santos situation-- I was too lazy to read about it on my own.

i should have done a "hey gheorghies" last night-- I made it to midnight! hi gheorghies or hey gheorghies?

and fuck yes! i will cross-promote promote my podcast here!

it's called "we defy augury." it's only for VERY VERY smart people . . .

rob said...

i just listened to one of dave's podcasts. it was about digital minimalism, or something. i got distracted by twitter so i only caught some of the details.

rob said...

also, i'm on board with uncle joe stepping down, except i don't think there's another dem that can win other than (maybe) secretary pete, and i don't see a cabinet member making a move on his boss, especially a young cabinet member.

rob said...

please tell me y’all have seen the commanders’ new mascot

rootsminer said...

I think 11pm eastern is a respectable “Hi Gheorghies” time.

Marls said...

Major Tuddy!

rob said...

we started watching wednesday last night. that's some fun right there.

OBX dave said...

Leftover nugget from New Year's Eve: until this season, 13 of 16 previous college playoff semifinals were decided by at least two scores, and 12 of 16 by at least three scores. So yeah, the other night was pretty stout.

rob said...

dave’s bees are buzzing

Mark said...

Wednesday is fantastic. My entire family (including my parents) thoroughly enjoyed it.

Mark said...

Spent most of the morning taking down all the holiday shit. My daughter asked if we could keep the tree up for one more day. Other than that it’s a full sprint back to “normal”

Mark said...

Was anyone that’s not a USC fan not rooting for Tulane? I was nearly screaming while walking on the treadmill at the gym.

rob said...

i turned it off at 45-30. at least the final period of the winter classic was exciting.

rob said...

dave's podcast (which is quite good, and both entertaining and educational) has three ratings. two people gave it 5 of 5 stars. one person gave it 1 of 5. i would like to know that person's identity, and possibly buy them a beer.

Marls said...

‘Twas’ not I, I swear.

Professor G. Truck said...

that's exactly what marls would say!

i make the case in my "carrie soto is wack" episode that a great work of art will not have all high ratings-- dumb people won't understand it! you think kandinsky got all five star ratings?

rob said...

i would buy marls a beer

Mark said...

Had to put our 13 year old Maine Coon down today. Not a great start to 2023. My wife was an absolute mess. Bad times. The cat and I weren’t particularly close (not much of a cat person) but she’d been a fixture in our lives and she and I had our moments. Pets are great but the inevitably of outliving them is awful.

rob said...

it's the worst. our 13 year-old cat had a very aggressive tumor a few months ago, went from totally normal to unable to move her back legs in about two months. had to put her down. first time i'd been in the room for that. glad i could be with her, but it's horrible.

mr kq said...

Man that sucks Mark, very sorry to hear. Still miss my best dude Bobo.

Mark said...

Thanks y’all. It always sucks. Had to put down two pit bulls within months of each other a few years back.

Marls said...

Sorry to hear it, Mark. Sucks really bad.

Shlara said...

Bobo!! He was the best dog

Mark said...

Unbelievably scary scene in Cincinnati.

Marls said...

Horrifying

rob said...

no other word for it.

Marls said...

They need to call this game.

Shlara said...

this sport is barbaric, and this is why I don't watch it anymore

Mark said...

The NFL initially only giving the teams 5 minutes to warm up after the injury says everything you need to know about how tone deaf the league and its leadership is.

rob said...

i don't pay much attention to the nfl anymore, mostly because it's a gross money grab and a meatgrinder for so many young athletes. but i went to see the giants and commanders two weeks ago. and i do pay attention to college football, especially at colorado, because my kid is there and part of the spectacle. and i go to high school football games, still, because it's a community event and i know a lot of kids and their parents that are involved. it's barbaric, and it's entertaining, and it's fun to be in the arena, and it's harder and harder to reconcile all of those things at the same time.