Mark's Wife is Sick of Me

I often text Mark about sneakers.  I think he often buys the sneakers I text him.  As a result, I'm pretty sure his wife is sick of me.  So it goes.

Starting today, Roger Federer is auctioning off a collection of clothing and racquets he used in various major tournaments, the Olympics, and Davis Cup play.  All proceeds go to the Roger Federer Foundation.  The crown jewel of the auction are these Air Zoom Vapor/Air Jordan III mashups from the 2014 US Open.

They are, as the kids say, hot fire.  Seven years ago Mark commented on them, saying "Z- you see the new Federer/ Jordan 3 mashups?  Whoooo."

The estimate is £40,000 to £60,000.  That's about $56,000 to $84,000.  Mark's wife hates me right now.

Luckily, there are other similar, cheaper options to bid on.  These are estimated at £30,000 to £50,000.  As are these.

But look, no sane human being spends that kind of money on used shoes.  Mark has dogs and kids and a house to pay for.  Much more problematic are these Air Zoom Vapor/Air Max 95 mashups:

They're new, autographed, and come in a fresh box.  Crispy.  As.  Fuck.  The £3,000 to £5,000 estimate is still a lot of quid, but not enough to bankrupt the college fund.  Mark's wife really hates me right now.  But it's for a good cause!

Kitten Filter For the Win

 I do not suggest doing this in a judicial proceeding.  Not even in Texas.

Disco Still Rules. Zoom!

I am on Instagram. Some of you are too. I use it mostly for amusement purposes. And for looking at sexy ladies. Don't tell the missus about that last part.

I mostly follow accounts that make me laugh. And I'm not picky about my laughs. I'll take them low-brow or high-brow. I mostly get them low-brow, from accounts like @joemande, @gymfailstories, @miserable_men, @kyledunnigan1, @festivalist, @kookslams, @failvibes, @ryanoflan and many others.

I follow @nickkroll on Instagram. He turned me on to a video that has wormed its way into my earholes and eyeballs in the last few days. It's a disco song/performance called Space Rescue by Zoom. They are Spanish. They perform what can best be described as cocaine-infused interpretations of disco music. Did I suck you in yet? Do you not believe me? Check out that video here. It's so awesome it's mesmerizing.

The choreography of that video blows me away. It seems to be the basis for the dance scene to Machine Gun in Boogie Nights, which is one of my favorite minutes in the history of cinema. Check it out right here!



The Zoom video and music also remind me of the performance part from the all-male synchronized swimming skit from SNL, which I put in my top 10 SNL skits of all time. Harry Shearer is an amazing straight man, Martin Short is at the peak of his warped powers here, and Christopher Guest shows what the next chapter of his career would be.



Happy Friday.