Yesterday, she and her sister were huddled around our dining room table, giggling about something. Several minutes later, she displayed this on our kitchen organizer:
The small image is hard to read for us older folk, so let me copy it here in blogtext. It's a quarantine drinking game, courtesy of my daughters.
drink every time you're bored
drink every time you text/tell someone you're bored
drink every time you see a corona meme
drink each time you see a different government official
drink every time you see Trump
drink every time JoJo scratches at the door
drink every time Katy asks to see Jack
drink every time Dad is angry but says he's not
drink every time someone mentions needing time organization
drink every time Dad turns a video on at full volume
drink every time Katy leaves the house
drink for every hour Reilly's in her room
drink every time Mom makes a disdaining remark about Trump
drink at any time politics is brought up
drink every time Katy is with Jack
drink any time Katy is seen with a book
drink every time Katy says something about how Reilly's room smells
drink every time Mom babytalks the dog
drink every time the only thing to do is go outside
drink every time Mom says she's doing work, but is on her phone
drink every time Katy mentions her tattoo
drink every time Katy complains about senior year being ruined
drink every time dad is seen with a beer
drink every time someone walks JoJo
drink every time Mom asks about our plan for the day
drink every time Katy lights a candle
drink every time the news is on
drink every time someone cries
drink every time you open snap and close it
drink any time someone thinks we won't go back to school
drink every time it's unseasonably cold out
If nothing else, we're going to be very hydrated. The kids are alright.
Posts
51 comments:
At least someone is being productive.
Biggest unforeseen work-and-learn-from-home snafu in zhome is our internet bandwidth. zwoman's company only uses Skype, even when they're in the office, so every time she talks on the phone she's on the wifi. And her job involves lots of phone calls. Both of zkids have online lessons and some of them consume a lot of data. And of course I'm online too, uploading and downloading files, WebExing, etc. As a result, the last person to open a data-heavy app is often SOL.
Related note: I’ve noticed that conference call lines are showing signs of fatigue, if you will. Last three meetings-cum-teleconferences I’ve been on featured a quarter of the participants unable to successfully make the call. Either a busy signal — a blast from the past — or an automated voice politely explaining that the maximum number of participants had joined, when there was supposed to be no max. If people persisted, they were rewarded with successful entry, but it just seems that in some of these cases, systems weren’t designed for this much use.
Rob, good luck with the epidural today.
I'm sneaking the idea of creating a drinking game, as a 'homework' item, on my son's school assignment list.
We have been playing a lot of board games at night. We hit up Target about a week or so ago to stock up on some new ones. But most games these days are 4 or more players which basically means my wife's nephew, who lives with us, gets dragged into each game. It's exactly what a 24 year old wants to do with their free time.
given that haircuts aren't really an option for a while, i think this is an excellent opportunity for whitney to recreate the flattop/mullet he had freshman year. grow the back long, get a friend with some clippers to buzz the top. it'd look faaaannnnntastic. come on, man. do it for the team.
One of my least favorite words that financial market pundits use in periods of volatility is “bottoming.” It has an opaque, we-think-selling-is-almost-over-but-we-really-have-no-tucking-idea feel to it.
With that said, I believe we are bottoming. Investors realize the spike is underway, and we’ll have a baseline of critical mass testing later this week to assess the curve. We’ll still have massive short-term unemployment and financial stress, but it looks like the market is pricing that in and accommodative fiscal policy will ease the pain a bit.
My bigger question is this: if cases peak in 45 days, as some experts suggest, what do we do from weeks 6-12, when cases are declining? Are we still self-quarantining? By week 12, most Americans will still have avoided the virus, and (hopefully) very few folks will have it. Do we just roll back to normal life, knowing the virus will still be spreading, albeit on a smaller scale?
on the conf call issue, I've been using the Canadian call-in line for a bunch of these
steamroller, eh
Good questions, Teer. (The TR equivalent of Teej.) Questions for a brighter mind than mine.
Everyone is now talking about "herd immunity" and the value of everyone getting it and then getting better. You know, with some necessary-evil casualties. Yikes.
I don't fucking know. Don't fucking ask me.
And Rob, I'm sincerely flattered and amused that you think I have enough hair up top to pull off anything remotely close to my 1989 effervescence. Skullets are the worst of the worst.
I will say that I haven't shaved in a week. Feels like mustache season.
I’m growing a catastrophe mustache like I did after Sandy. It’s still wispy like after Sandy.
I don’t think we roll back to normal life with normal travel for a long time. I think this think will pass through in waves and wind up in the middle of the country later on. We likely won’t be able to travel internationally until the pandemic is over in 18 months. Just my best guess.
I haven’t shaved in two weeks. No haircut in three weeks. My days w/ my beloved Dominican hairdresser Karina in midtown Manhattan are behind me for a while. She’s the only one who could handle my greying fro.
I've offered both of my shaggy sons appointments at my basement buzzer salon, but they're resistant so far.
I'm not sure how we'll see things progress in my somewhat more remote part of the country. As far as I know there are no known cases in our region, but schools are closed, events are cancelled, and restaurants are take out only. If we're 45 days away from the peak in NYC, I wonder if we're responding to a threat that hasn't actually arrived here yet.
i fall on the pessimistic side of the issue. i think the virus has been spreading for weeks, even months, while the administration ignored it out of fear for the market's reaction. which turns out to have been a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy. there are places in the country that will have truly terrible infection rates, while others won't be as bad - that's an advantage of having a massive geographic area. i don't think kids will go back to school this year, and i don't think we'll be back to some sort of 'normal' for at least six months.
I'm catching up on posts--can I add a song to the list?
Smashing Pumpkins, Bullet with Butterfly Wings
Not sure what that says about my head space at the moment.
On the grooming topic--I've been all glasses all the time
And haven't used a hair dryer in over a week.
Day one of hair = Felicity-era Kerri Russell
Day three of hair = George Clooney's mullet from the 80s
It's a topic of discussion on every internal videoconference with my office
So we should be quarantining for now, for a period of probably three months? And after that, we’ll see when/where hot spots emerge? Kinda makes me wish my family and I get it now and get immunity (assuming most of us will get it). I can’t imagine how the world will function during months 4-18, when 95% of the country goes around and wonders when/if they’ll get it. Hopefully a vaccine can go commercial before then.
Would love folks to post any coherent forward-looking articles here. I think we understand the present, but things are murky as hell after that.
Vaccine approval takes a long time because you have to demonstrate the absence of illness as opposed to the cure of an infected person. Maybe that's easy in this situation given how virulent it is. It isn't clear that this is one-and-done like chicken pox--I've read reports of people getting well and getting reinfected. That doesn't make sense to me, but that's what I've read.
People on Breitbart say this will blow over soon so what do I know.
Here's something to read Z:
https://www.calcalistech.com/ctech/articles/0,7340,L-3800632,00.html
This comes from the father of one of my colleagues who is an infectious disease specialist.
And, here's his latest dos and don'ts list:
Do treat cardboard boxes like potentially contaminated surfaces for up to 48 hours. Wipe down cardboard packaged groceries and packages, as well as plastic ones.
Don’t enter enclosed public spaces unless essential. Minimize your time at the food market, pharmacy, essential medical services, etc. Sanitize your hands when you enter and leave. Have a bottle of hand sanitizer in your pocket or purse. Carry some surface wipes with you as well. Wear a mask if you have any cold or flu symptoms when inside the food market, etc. Stay 6ft away from others whenever possible. You don’t need to wear gloves.
Do wear an N-95 mask if you are over 60, on immunosuppressives, have underlying lung or heart disease and need to go to the pharmacy or supermarket, etc. Make sure the mask is snug. It will protect you 95% of the time (painters/construction masks are fine as long as they say N-95); a surgical mask, kerchief, bandana, scarf not so much. Unfortunately N-95s are hard to find now and especially needed by health care workers, but hopefully will be available soon.
Don’t take plaquenil. Lots of press recently about chloroquine and plaquenil. Tests in the lab show inhibition of COVID-19 virus but the concentration necessary is quite high. The Chinese say they have studied 100 patients but haven’t shared the results. Some of our hospitals are using it for very sick patients and our own clinical studies are underway. The side effects can be significant, like sudden cardiac death. Many candidate drugs are being studied so we’ll have something that works soon.
so pub night is off?
i believe i executed that "flat top" haircut on Whitney-- is that memory correct? if so, why did he mistake me for a barber?
cases might not peak for 45 days? i'm going to try and get this thing and see if my immune system can handle it. if not, well . . . it was meant to be.
our cleaning ladies came today and i've still been going to acupuncture. and running and playing tennis. these are reasonable, right?
For my first flat-top freshman year, I went to the barber shop in the Monticello shopping center a few doors down from the Pizza Hut carryout/delivery shop.
By sophomore year, it was just easier to let you do it, Dave. Even though you were somewhat to very drunk. And I don't know what you'd call that cut, but it was not flat. Or even. Or good-looking.
Punk rock.
i needed a level.
first rainy day of this shitshow and i'm realizing i'm cut out for the quarantine lifestyle.
I practice social distancing even outside of pandemic circumstances.
Dave - Gov Murphy just ordered all businesses that can’t respect the 6’ rule to shut down: haircuts, nail salons, tattoo parlors, etc. Your days of acupuncture may be done for a while. Not sure what that means for the Shampooch van scheduled to come tmrw to cut my dog’s hair.
I hit the barbershop on Friday so I'm crispy for now. It was empty.
I am alarmed by the stats on the dashboard https://ncov2019.live/
Florida was one of the last states to report a confirmed case, but they have risen to fifth in the country now with 384. And 8 fatalities, which will assuredly rise quickly given the demographic of the Sunshine State. Bad news ahead for them.
Italy has overtaken China in coronavirus deaths, amazingly. Let's pray theirs isn't the track we are following.
Daddy needs a drink.
Pour it nice and strong with your cleaning outfit on.
Italy's fatality rate is 8%. Double China. Yikes.
this might make you feel better.
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2020-03-18/99-of-those-who-died-from-virus-had-other-illness-italy-says
the virus is really widespread there and it's killing people with other illnesses. still terrible, of course, but the pie chart is fairly telling.
Because there aren't lots of diabetic and/or hypertensive Americans?
I think Dave was saying you — the GTB collective — might feel better knowing your ultimately imminent death may not be as certainly around the corner.
DeBlasio just called Trump the Herbert Hoover of our generation. He is eviscerating him in his presser right now. CNN is gonna love this.
A legit 5-min attack. Trump will shit his pants and go on a tweet-storm. Not sure shaming Trump is the best way to get resources, but DeBlasio has no fucks to give at the moment.
hey, so it turns out getting a big needle shoved into the back of your neck is an unpleasant experience. in case you were thinking about doing it for fun.
I’ve known DeBlasio for 35 years and he’s never had a fuck to give, not one.
through a seriously weird confluence of events, i've been tasked to draft an email to vice president pence (himself, not his staff) regarding our company's capabilities to support the government's covid-19 response efforts. on the one hand, we really can help. on the other, i hope nobody figures out that the first letter of each sentence combine to spell 'you are a charlatan and probably a closeted gay person'.
Your whole life has been leading up to this moment.
That’s a helluva conundrum. If you want motivation, watch Maron’s latest special on Netflix. His closing joke is a pretty raunchy bit about God convincing Pence to suck his dick.
maron's special started fun-- you taking turmeric?-- and then got pretty weird and dark . . .
i'm secretly rebelling by drinking high-octane beer(s) while taking muscle relaxers and composing purple prose. i am not responsible for my words.
Prince used to do that
he died from it, too. i'm cutting you out of my will.
W.T.F
Senator Dumped Up to $1.7 Million of Stock After Reassuring Public About Coronavirus Preparedness
Intelligence Chair Richard Burr’s selloff came around the time he was receiving daily briefings on the health threat.
https://www.propublica.org/article/senator-dumped-up-to-1-6-million-of-stock-after-reassuring-public-about-coronavirus-preparedness?utm_content=buffer25ee1&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter&utm_campaign=ProPublica+Main+#179760
And W.T.F. part 2
Sen. Kelly Loeffler Dumped Millions in Stock After Coronavirus Briefing
https://www.thedailybeast.com/sen-kelly-loeffler-dumped-millions-in-stock-after-coronavirus-briefing?ref=wrap
willing to bet that there are dems who did the same thing. prosecute them all.
This thread was compelling and pretty depressing, though realistic. Then Rob nearly brought to tears of laughter with his Pence comment. Well done by all.
My oldest is also missing the rest of her senior year and all that comes with it. Including sports, a few more college tours and all the shit Rob mentioned. Weird thing for an 18 year old to process.
Per latest comments, I'd welcome a ruling or at least thoughts from the G:TB legal and financial division on my senator's stock sell-off following days of high-level briefings on the disease. Certainly, doesn't pass the ethical smell test, but is what he did illegal?
A forensic accountant I know wrote me that if he had done what Burr did, he'd be in jail.
Rob, good luck and Godspeed with your pain management. Self-quarantine, self-medication -- all the same thing.
i'm neither a legal nor a financial expert, but barring some serious exculpatory evidence, your man broke the same law that landed martha stewart in jail and another law that's more specifically aimed at public officials.
folks are speculating that the tuesday jobs report is gonna be catastrophic. i don't know shit about shit, but i just asked my financial advisor to put all my stuff into cash for a minute.
The Burr sales occurred on 2/13, a week before the crash. Would be important to know if the sales were closer to $0.6 MM or $1.7 MM (his alleged net worth at the time). Also important to note that the crash came immediately after a surge to all-time record highs. Defense attorneys could plausibly say the sales were designed to reallocate assets following the equity rip.
Loeffler and spouse are allegedly worth more than $500 MM, so news of $1-$3 MM of stock sales is barely material. They probably trade pretty regularly. Likely they acted inappropriately, but there may not be a smoking gun. We may need an easy victory over the pandemic and a Joey Bides victory in November to get any ball rolling.
Post a Comment