Hopping On The Medicarousel

In a testament to modern medicine and dumb luck, I turn 65 at the end of September, which means I’m in the crosshairs for that singular American joyride, Medicare. 

I’ve spent much time of late researching various parts, plans, supplements, coverage gaps, co-pays, deductibles and assorted minutiae related to health care. It’s as entertaining as you imagine. 

As I’m older than all of you here in the digital tree fort, I’d gladly be the doddering, arrhythmic sounding board for the group, but my adulting skills are limited. I pay bills on time and follow traffic laws; beyond that, it’s sketchy. Besides, by the time the rest of you approach 65, President Tuberville will have abolished Medicare in favor of some sort of health care Hunger Games. We’ll all be peddling our organs on the futures market and dumpster diving behind Trader Joe’s. 

I’ll keep the details to a minimum because this site has an ethos to uphold, and extended exposure will numb you. Medicare signup is a fairly straightforward process. Folks are required to register with the government in the six-month period before and after their 65th birthday. They can delay health care through Medicare if they’re insured through their jobs or some other preferred outlet. Medicare doesn’t cover everything, nor is it free. 

Unless you’re a Marvel superhero or inclined to roll the dice, it’s generally advisable to sign up for separate plans that cover prescription drugs and fill in gaps that basic Medicare doesn’t cover, such as dental and vision. Supplemental plans are standardized by the government in what they must provide, though cost from one insurance company to the next is not. Think of it like buying a Coke at the grocery store and at 7-Eleven. Same product, different prices. 

Many insurance heavy hitters are also in the Medicare marketplace. I could easily wallpaper my bathroom with literature I received from a bunch of them congratulating me on my “milestone” birthday and touting their services. In my previous life as a newspaper keyboard jockey, I researched lots of subjects, though insurance and health care rarely came up in explorations of field goal percentage and third-down efficiency. Not my areas of expertise. As I tried to compare prices for various plans and providers, insurance companies wanted just enough personal info to permit them to flood me with more promotional materials. 

An inordinate amount of dog walking took place during the research process, since it seemed more beneficial than staring at the computer screen and sticking spoons into my eyes. I then learned that there are companies dedicated to helping people navigate Medicare enrollment. They may have arrangements with 20 or 30 different insurance companies, but don’t push specific insurers or plans. Their agents walk customers through options and provide them with multiple price quotes and comparisons. You don’t get a bill from the company or agent, but my understanding is that they get paid through the arrangements to said insurers. 

Guy I spoke to at one such advisory company was mega informative and helpful, if only so that I didn’t have to fend off a half-dozen sales pitches. Armed with just enough info to be dangerous, it was left to me to choose insurance providers and plans and commit money for the next year, without knowing how any of it would play out, only that I would be somehow “covered.” It was more nerve-wracking than asking girls to dance when I was in middle school. Probably part of the whole adulting thing. 

Anyway, I’m now part of the gargantuan, government-subsidized system. There are legit ideological and policy discussions to be had about government reach versus personal responsibility. I wouldn’t attempt to persuade anybody one way or the other, though I’m in the camp that believes countries taking care of their citizens shouldn’t be confined to weaponry and soldiers, particularly in a nation as affluent as ours. To what extent that should include health care and various safety nets is for brighter minds. I go forward with fingers crossed, hoping that when I need a doc or a scrip or a procedure, that they’re available and don’t require a transfer of funds or to sell my car. I don’t think it’s covered by Medicare, but hit me up if anyone has a line on a decent shaman.