Sunday, January 31, 2021

Dolla Dolla Bills, Y'all

The Underpants Gnomes have long been a recurring character here, albeit somewhat subliminally. Their loose conception of capitalism is a convenient shorthand for the cockamamie of all types.


Today, though, I bring you an idea that's so stupid and risky that. It. Just. Might. Work.

It took the combination of sports betting becoming legal in most places where Gheorghies reside and the crowd-fueled phenomenon that blasted GameStop stock through the ceiling to spark my notion. The concept also incorporates the indubitable fun that comes with backing a longshot (with a frisson of 'when I win the lottery' anticipatory windfall). I put $50 on West Virginia to win the NCAA Tournament at 40-1 the last time I was in Las Vegas, and enjoyed the heck out of their run...to the Sweet Sixteen. Fucking Gonzaga.

John Petty gonna win us alllll the money
I have noted previously that I'm not a very good sports bettor. I'm long on hunch and short on research and patience. But it occurs to me that there are a decent number of folks on this here website that know a few things about sporting affairs and are reasonably savvy with the digits and the dollars. 

My modest proposal to y'all is this: legal Gheorghesourced long-term sports wagers. Kinda like our own little idiot hedge fund. We each put in a couple of units, come up with a list of future-focused bets we like (Alabama at 25-1 to win this year's NCAA Tournament, anyone?), and follow them as a group for kicks.

Need I spell out what our next step is? 

Just ask the Gnomes.

33 comments:

Whitney said...

I put $30 on Adam Scott to win this weekend. Payout is $1,020.
Yesterday about 5:30pm FanDuel offered to buy me out for $226. I got greedy and didn’t take the offer. He immediately bogeyed twice. Dammit.

Whitney said...

The 8th ranked men’s hoops team failed to score a point for over eight (8) minutes down the stretch in a game versus their hated in-commonwealth rivals.

Breaks my ever-loving heart.

rob said...

that's the spirit, whit.

rob said...

patrick reed's blatant cheating probably didn't help whit's annoyance much, either.

T.J. said...

a decade late, natch, but just binge watched season 1 of "Game of Thrones". and my biggest takeway... I cannot believe Cersei pulled the Leo pointing meme halfway through the season and said the thing

zman said...

I am in favor of this proposal but my contributions would be more small-ball, like identifying 15 seeds that will win a game. Norfolk State, for example.

zman said...

Unrelatedly, there's an op-ed in today's WashPo by one of the GameStop investors. She posits that Robinhood made this situation possible with commission-free trading because "[r]etail investors, like me, no longer have to lose our hard-earned coin paying $6.95 per trade." Was $6.95 truly a significant barrier to entry? People are willing to invest $100 in the stock market only if they don't have to pay an additional $7 to make the trade?

rob said...

placed my first legal wager online today. caa hoops, natch. fanduel not taking action on the tribe, so i’ve got $30 on a two-game teaser of hofstra -2.5 vs uncw and delaware -6.5 vs elon. baby steps.

Marls said...

6.95% is a crazy vig to pay to make a trade and really cuts into potential earnings for anybody that is really watching their investment expenses. That said, I suspect z is right that it’s not a real barrier to entry for these investors. What Robinhood did was specifically market themselves to small retail investors with a simple platform AND no fees that made investing super easy. However, just like any “free” tech platform, it ain’t free. They generate revenue by routing though market makers like Citadel. In exchange for free trades, Robinhood is using user transactions to generate revenue. Now users are stunned to find that Robinhood might be beholden to their revenue source...

I’m shocked to find gambling is going on in here!

TR said...

Season 1 Cersei is as sexy as it gets, IMO. I don’t blame Jaime for sticking it in sis.

I have a whole lotta thoughts about this $GME story. I think most folks lack full perspective and don’t appreciate the nuances. But I will say this - the collateral damage of the “tear all of Wall Street down” may be catastrophic for everybody who owns equities in any form (529, 401-k, etc).

This is my second reminder that lowering the risk profile of your account may be wise. Much easier to see 10% downside than 10% upside. Remember that when these hedge funds get “owned” by Reddit and have to close out shorts, they do so by selling their long positions, which are generally high quality companies.

Whitney said...

rob, I took a 3 team parlay with Elon +6.5, Hartford -3.5, and New Hampshire -4.5. Who knew the Blue Hens versus the former Fighting Christians would be the GTB Game of the Day?

I also took Hofstra separately. And the Johnnies getting 4.5, just for Marls.

rob said...

hofstra does its part. legggooooo hens.

Mark said...

Took the kid shoe shopping today. She walked out of Foot Locker with a pair of Stan Smith/Superstar mashups and limited edition Foamposites. The kid has good taste and a proud Father.

rob said...

27 posts in january. most in a single month since september 2014. second wind g:tb is fun.

TR said...

Rob - when are we gonna see your Darnell Rogers post?

rob said...

baby tribe overcome a 7-point halftime deficit to sweep the weekend series with towson. now 4-4 on the year. dane fischer, it appears, can coach.

rob said...

he's shawnta rogers' kid! i need to work that one up.

rob said...

delaware was up 15 with 1:37 left. elon finished the game on a 17-6 run. i believe that's what they call a bad beat. keeps whit's parley alive, though, so i guess that's something.

Whitney said...

What’s funny is I didn’t even know who I had. Thought I’d bet Hartford but I bet Stony Brook. I won my parlay. $20 got me $144. Score it.

rob said...

something else that's funny, in that it exposes my lack of gambling savvy: the bet i placed was actually a teaser, and i got 4 points movement on both lines. so i actually had hofstra +1.5 and delaware -2.5. andrew carr made three free throws in the final 11 seconds, which made me a winner. what's the opposite of a bad beat?

Marls said...

I arranged for the Johnnies to come though for you Whit. Should have taken them on the money line. That said, .10 of juice is not bad.

Whitney said...

The lesson, as always, is that Rob and I are idiots

Whitney said...

Thanks, Marls. I’ll take the quick $9.

Bludgeoned by golf today. Coulda gone a lot of ways that paid me handsomely. This result was not one.

rob said...

plus, it's patrick reed, who's a dickhead.

who do we like in the waste management open next weekend? kinda like the cut of tony finau's jib. gheorghesource!

Whitney said...

Ahem, Danimal, this is where you can weigh in

Whitney said...

Also, on GTB recs I watched all of Ted Lasso. Best fucking thing I’ve watched in a long, long time. Good for the soul.

Mark said...

Wife and I had a night to ourselves last night. We’re old so all we did was go to the local bar for a drink and some takeout. Ran into a guy we know from high school who caught a shit ton of fish out on the ocean. He invited us over for dinner with a bunch of others tonight. We accepted. The food was fantastic and the company was good. Chopped it up with my wife’s high school boyfriend. We were friends back then so it’s not awkward but the dynamic is still a little different.

Mark said...

I have a Shawnta Rogers story to contribute to a post.

rob said...

the wiz were down 5 to the nets with 10 seconds left. brad beal hit a deep three, then the wiz stole the inbounds pass and russell westbrook hit another three. and *then*, the nets missed a wide-open layup. insane.

zman said...

Trump and the legal team for his impeachment parted ways yesterday or today, with briefing due on Tuesday. His new lawyers are David Schoen, who has a gmail email address on his website, and Bruce L. Castor Jr., who works at a firm with the web address mtvlaw.com. I am not making this up.

https://www.schoenlawfirm.com/
https://www.mtvlaw.com/the-firm/bruce-l-castor-jr/

I don't want to be a snob but this is a far cry from Emmet Flood, John Dowd, or the cadre he relied on at Jones Day. He'll still be acquitted, but not because of anything his lawyers do or say.

T.J. said...

z, one of them was apparently a Jeffrey Epstein lawyer and the other was an AG that wouldn't charge Bill Cosby.

Whitney said...

Mark, having moved back to my hometown where some folks never left (or maybe just a quick boomerang to college and back) and many others found their way back, there’s quite a bit of mixed company situations involving people’s exes here, including my own. Most times it’s just fine, it’s ancient history, but every once in a while there’s an ass-clenchingly awkward moment. Makes for good comedy in some cases.

TR said...

Ja Rule on CNBC now. He doesn't look high, but he is flailing over questions about Fyre.

Listen and learn! Or don't.