On the ninth day of Gheorghemas
The Mets Will Not Win the World Series: HIT Seems like a layup now, but they were the odds on favorite at the time of the prediction. The Nats have Natitude, the Mets have Sukitude.
George Santos Is Going to Bring Down DJT: MISS I'm still holding out hope that Trump's PAC was the clownshow dumb enough to fund Santos, but with George kicked out of congress I don't think this one is going to happen.
Joe Biden Will Announce That He Isn't Running in 2024: MISS: As I said last year, "I like Joe Biden, I voted for Joe Biden... Joe Biden is 80 years old and has clearly lost his fastball." His polls keep getting worse and point to Trump beating him in 24. Wish the Dems had a better option.
2023 Will See The Return of the G:TB MaxiSummit: HIT While not as large as originally planned, Columbia SC saw 3 G:TB'ers and numerous FoG:TB attend the South Carolina/Florida SEC tilt. We need to grow this trend this year.
Twitter Will Not Declare Bankruptcy: HIT This time last year the chattering pundits loved the idea that Twitter (now X) would be belly up by now. Not yet, though Elon is still a douche.
TR Will Return To G:TB: MISS Despite Zman's best efforts, this didn't happen. If Aaron Rodgers 4 play Jet season could not bring him back, it might not happen.
Someone Will Buy Their WCSAGD Car: MISS - I think, although Zman did buy a sweet ride.
2023 Will Mark The Return of "Hi Gheorghies": HIT - I doubt that we will ever return to the level of late night hijinks as the early years around here, but it was good to see some a bit more G:TB After Dark
Dave Will Cross Promote His Other Blog and Podcast In a Post On G:TB: HIT - Biggest layup of the year. Dave checked this box on Feb 9.
5 out of 9 for a .550 batting average. Not bad. I will take that and try to build on it. On to the fearless predictions for 2024.
1. The Mets Will Not Win The World Series: This is likely an evergreen prediction. It has been 37 years since they brought home the hardware and this season will not change that. Better ownership and leadership provide Whit and me with hope but 2024 will not be the year. Alas.
2. Taylor Swift and Travis MaAuto Will Break Up: T Swift is the most famous person on the planet right now. This is not exaggeration. She has built a music, business, and real estate empire with a net worth of over $1.1 billion with a B. She is having fun with a very good football player but this prognosticator does not see it lasting. As Taylor has sung, if she was a man she'd be "The Man". Well, she is The Man and Travis will be by the side of road by next December.
3. Nikki Haley Will Be The Republican Nominee: Notwithstanding his unwavering base, the Orange Julius has some significant legal political issues that will not go away. Running against a clown car of other candidates in the primaries will result in DJT being the nominee again, but if the GOP can coalesce around a single alternative candidate Trump will be in for a dogfight. Haley seems to be the one in the current group that could pull that off. The political theatre of Trump running as a third party candidate would be delicious too.
4. TR Will Return To G:TB: My only double down from last year. I am prefacing this on one thing, I believe that the Jets will make the playoffs. You may say that just making the playoffs is a pretty low bar, but, in case you missed it, with their recent elimination from playoff contention the Jets are now the team in the four major North American sports leagues with the longest playoff drought. If Aaron Rodgers plays more than 4 plays the Jetropolitans have a great shot to break that streak. It is my Gheorghemas wish that it would be enough to get TR back in the comments.
5. DJT Is Going to Get Banned From Twitter/X....Again: Let's start by acknowledging that Donny Boy is going to start tweeting (x'ing?) again with reckless abandon. As the primaries heat up he will not be able to resist using his once favorite platform to take shots at his foes. This will only grow as we move towards the general election with Trump saying more and more outrageous shit until he gets into a pissing fight with Elon over something. At that point, one of the biggest egomaniac assholes in America will ban the other biggest egomaniac asshole in America. Both will be thrilled by this outcome.
6. We Will Have A Major AI Enabled Cyber Attack: Cyber criminals are already using AI to improve their attacks. It is a foregone conclusion that AI is going to be a huge multiplier to the bot/deepfake/misinformation campaigns that are going to be part and parcel to the 2024 election cycle. Beyond that, in 2024 I think we see a major attack where AI is credited with being a huge factor in the success. This will result in politicians who have no idea what they are talking calling for hearings and regulations that ultimately result in very little...
7. The G:TB MaxiSummit Trend Will Continue: Whit's pending nuptials make this one almost a lock. However, as the G:TB editorial staff migrate more and more towards empty nesting status, the environment is ripe for real world interactions between denizens of this online community. Danimal needs to make a OBFT appearance. Rob needs to head south to a SEC college football game. We could all go see Season 2 of Coach Prime.
8. Third Time Is The Charm: I am fond of saying that all the cool kids have two marriages. Maybe it should be three. As I mentioned above, 2024 will find Whit celebrating his nuptials. I look forward to lifting a glass to the Mr. & Mrs. later this year, most importantly because Whit has found a special one.
9. Jay Monahan will be out at PGA Commissioner: Monahan has butchered the LIV Golf situation in almost every way possible. He ignored it hoping that it would go away. Then he tried playing the morality card, including rolling out the 9/11 families to carry water for the PGA in their fight against the Saudi back LIV tour. He also had some of the tour's biggest stars stake their reputation on siding with the PGA. Then he and the PGA turned around and climbed into bed with the same folks that they had been besmirching for months because the money was right. It was all bullshit from the beginning and now everyone knows it. Stars are jumping to LIV and the remaining players are pissed. The Saudis have most of the leverage at the moment. The Tour is going to have to cut an unfavorable deal and can thank Jay's leadership. A new leader is needed now. I nominate Danimal.
OK, see you back here next year to see how I did.
Merry Gheorghemas to all!
You think Allen Iverson will engineer a cyber attack?
ReplyDeleteWe talking about hacking? Hacking? We out here talking about hacking?
ReplyDeleteThat was worth a good chuckle, boys
ReplyDeleteAnd thankya, Marley Marls
i predict today is squeaky’s birthday. happy to you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteTaylor and Trav are getting married Marls.
ReplyDeleteNot sure if they will STAY married.
I'm not a Swiftie but this relationship has become my Roman Empire
Comment of the year goes to Shlara
ReplyDeleteAnd Squeak-Dooger, happy birthday!!!
ReplyDeleteAlso, my autocorrect suggested Dooger for my misspelled attempt. Technology wins.
For years zwoman thought Dooger's last name was Dooger because I referred to him and his wife as the Doogers. I don't think she figured things out until we started sending Christmas cards and she was like "who the hell are these people?"
ReplyDeleteI came home from college one summer and my stepdad asked me how Rob was.
ReplyDeleteWho?
Blank stare
Confused look
Uh… Squirrel?
Oh right! He’s good.
not bad marlodamus . . . i guess i have to finish up day ten (and sneak in a few cross-promotional links).
ReplyDeleteThanks for the positive holiday cheer, Marls!
ReplyDeletei predict pain
ReplyDeleteRootsy- I wanted to make sure that our correspondent on the OBX did not feel like the only downer. :)
ReplyDeleteShlara - you could be right, but I just don’t see it. She is the Alpha in that relationship and in basically everything she does. Maybe that will work for Travis and his ego, but it does not seem to be the MO for most professional athletes.
bomani and fox have an extended anti-uva rant on this week’s podcast, and it’s awesome
ReplyDeletedukes falling victim to the interim coach trap. coulda escaped the half without giving up that tuddy.
ReplyDeleterutgers is fucking awful
ReplyDeletethat’s sort of an all-purpose jersey recognition. can you be more specific?
ReplyDeletehappy belated squeaks.
ReplyDeletegood one marls.
tr has to be lurking in the corner, ya can't just quit gtb cold turkey. impossible.
disappointing loss for the dukes. i think i watched 2 games to completion this year - they lost both. hoops 11-0....have watched a couple quarters worth. that has to be the reason for both.
of all your predictions, i'd back the truck up on the ousting or "resignation" of monahan. the only way you could be wrong, and it's possible imo, if an announcement was made prior to the new year even beginning.
i side w/shlara on the traylor swelce tryst. feel free to use that, just pass along the credit if you would.
“I predict pain” is a terrible bastardization of the original Clubber Lang quote. Fix it.
ReplyDeletemethinks the lady protests way too much
ReplyDeleteI do want to hear more about the predicted cyber attack. Was having a conversation on this topic just yesterday with a friend. Are you putting your money under your mattress Marls? Inquiring minds want to know.
ReplyDeleteNo money under the mattress. I feel like the FI’s are better protected than most, but who knows. It’s more that I’m just not sure that the AI enabled defense has not caught up to the AI enabled offense that some threat actors are using.
ReplyDelete