zBouillabaise Returns

I have a few incomplete thoughts which I will stew together as zbouillabaise.

1. Fuck cancer.

My childhood BFF, whom several of you have met (including Danimal!), called me this week to share the good news that his mother appears to have beaten Stage 4 lung cancer through a combination of immunotherapy, chemotherapy, and surgery to remove 40% of her left lung.  Apparently she was cranky and bossing people around about an hour after she woke up from the procedure, which is to say she was fully back to normal.  She is an exceedingly tough person so her fortitude isn't a tremendous surprise, but still, fuck cancer.

2. Reading The Great Gatsby resulted in homework.

I recently read a post about a group of English professors who theorized that Jay Gatsby is Black.  I read The Great Gatsby in high school and saw Gatz about 14 years ago but I never heard this theory before, so I reread the book and I can see what they're getting at.  Alternatively, Gatsby is Jewish.  Or maybe both.  Also, I'm not convinced that Meyer Wolfsheim is really Jewish.  Anyway, I forgot that the book is only 150 pages long and that it's a damn good story.  And it's timely despite being 100 years old--the wealthy elite shit on the working man and blame his misfortune on the "others," and the working man gets violent at the others' expense.

I enjoyed the book (and the alternate theory of Gatsby's secret) so much that I contacted my high school English teacher (she's related to a friend) and we had a two and a half hour Z**m call about Gatsby, literature, and life in general.  She was my favorite teacher ever and it was great to reconnect.  She even gave me some reading assignments for our next call this afternoon.  So track down your favorite teacher and spend some quality time with them.

3. I am more optimistic about the Bills than ever before.

Or at least in a long time.  Going into the draft I told several Gheorghies that all I wanted to see them draft were cornerbacks and edge rushers.  My rationale is that it doesn't matter who the skill position players are on offense so long as they have Allen under center, and if you want to beat Mahomes you need to be able to get to him while only rushing four, and you need to cover everyone long enough for that four-man rush to get to him.  Beane largely listened to me, and they signed whatever is left of Joey Bosa (which I hope is significantly more than whatever was left of Von Miller over the past three seasons), so I am extremely optimistic going into the 2025 season.  Which means Allen gets hurt on the first snap.

4. Hell is other people.

I've said this here before.  This time it's less personal.  I've been plowing through Severance and pretty early on it reminded me of No Exit.  Then there's a scene in season 2 where a bizarre love triangle literally discusses who among them is going to hell.  Hopefully things will become clearer when I finish the season.  It's a great show, and you'll enjoy it even if you don't like existentialist references.  Check it out.

zBouillabaise

zBouillabaise is back!

1. zkids

Everyone else here has kids that are good at cool things.  I have little to brag about though, my kids have little talent.  zson's lone God-given gift reared its head at a Cub Scout meeting about 5 years ago when they had to try to use flint and steel to make a fire.  He went from kindling to roaring inferno in about two strikes of the metal and 15 seconds of puffing.  None of the other kids, or their parents, could do it so he went around starting fires for everyone else.  So he has a future in arsonry and insurance fraud.

And zdaughter's secret skill surfaced recently!  She went to a laser tag birthday party, winning all five rounds with the most confirmed kills in each round.  She was named MVP!  Now she's convinced that she's a Mandalorian.  So she has a future in warfare and bounty hunting.  Here's an action photo from my basement.

2. I read a book

I read a book and you should read it too.  FOGTB the DLC's wife wrote Grown Women and it's phenomenal.  I can't believe I know anyone who can write so much so well.  The novel spans a forty-some-odd year arc of time in the lives of a family of four generations of women and the dysfunction between them.  Their relationships get hectic but the end made me smile.  I'll let the Daves write a proper analysis after they read it.

3. zcats

zcats have a YouTube channel.  There's a lot of snuggling and slapboxing involved but I foresee lots of ping pong ball content soon.  I can't embed any of the videos because they're all "shorts," whatever the hell that means.

zbouillabiase: Political Natterings

I haven't posted anything in a long time and I don't have anything particular cogent to say, although I've seen a few interesting pieces of political news recently.

First, the New York Times and other major media outlets reported that a parasitic worm ate a portion of RFK Jr.'s brain and then died there.  Lest you assert "this is lamestream media bias against the antivaxx crowd!!" I direct you to the portion of the article that quotes deposition testimony given by RFK Jr. in which he said that doctors determined than an abnormality seen in his brain scan "was caused by a worm that got into my brain and ate a portion of it and then died."  More succinctly, he testified under oath that he had a dead worm in his brain.  He further testified "I have cognitive problems, clearly," and "I have short-term memory loss, and I have longer-term memory loss that affects me."  In response to the article, RFK Jr. twat (xeeted?) "I offer to eat 5 more brain worms and still beat President Trump and President Biden in a debate."  So he admits the whole worm thing.  And he had mercury poisoning too, which also doesn't bode well for his overall health or his cognition.

Apparently you get worms in your brain by eating undercooked pork, which can carry tapeworms.  Typically the tapeworm larvae wind up in your intestines but sometimes they get lost and wind up in your brain.

Once there, they eat your brain but I guess that isn't what they're supposed to nosh on so they die and your body naturally walls them off, forming cysts.  Like this.

Just to be clear, you don't want that.  All this tapeworm talk reminds me of Irvine Welsh's novel Filth which is partially narrated by the main character's tapeworm.  I've been reading more of his stuff lately (once I get used to reading in a Scottish accent I keep going so I don't have to reacclimatize) and it's all good.  My two favorite recent passages are "I was differently made: at his age I had testicles as vicious and hairy as the heads of two ferrets" (from Dead Men's Trousers) and "Terry gave thanks for all those years of excessive beer-drinking and takeaways.  Without them he would have fallen to certain death.  A lesser man, body honed on exercise and diet rather than sloth, indolence and abuse would be dead by now, he reflected.  A lesser man." (from Glue).

Second, Donald Trump is running his reelection campaign like a goddamned gangster.  And I don't mean "gangster" euphemistically, I mean it literally.  He has family all over "this thing of ours."  First he installed his daughter-in-law, Lara Trump, as co-chair of the RNC.  This makes it easier for him to divert super PAC money to his pay legal bills.  Second, he plans on making Uday and Qusay Donald Trump Jr. and Eric Trump "loyalty czars" in his next administration.  This means he will only appoint and hire people who pledge complete fealty to DJ Trump.  Third, he got 18-year-old Barron Trump named as an at-large delegate for Florida in the Republican national convention.  

What do all of these people have in common?  They're family, which means they will always be loyal.  You can never lose your family.

Finally, Trump's Veepstakes competition is well underway.  All sorts of seemingly important people are willing to debase themselves on national television for a shot at being on the ticket.  Kristi Noem shot her way out of contention, but there's still plenty of chatter around JD Vance, Marco Rubio, Doug Burgum, and Tim Scott.  Like I said in 2016, "he's running his campaign on some next-level reality TV competition three-steps-ahead shit."  So it won't be any of those jackals.

Trump needs to win this thing to stay out of jail, and he needs to stay in office for the full four years so he can run again in 2028.  There's only one way out of office once he's in (assuming the Big Macs don't get him in his sleep).  He's clearly unimpeachable--he literally staged a coup and suffered no consequences in the Senate.  All he has to worry about is section 4 of the 25th Amendment, which says in part:

Whenever the Vice President and a majority of either the principal officers of the executive departments or of such other body as Congress may by law provide, transmit to the President pro tempore of the Senate and the Speaker of the House of Representatives their written declaration that the President is unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office, the Vice President shall immediately assume the powers and duties of the office as Acting President.

The key here is that the 25th Amendment can only be triggered if the VP signs on.  In order to boot the Prez, you need the Veep.  There is absolutely positively no fucking way in hell that Donald Trump is going to give anyone the opportunity to shiv him in the back unless that person is a rock-solid reliable supplicant.  And that has to be family.  Maybe Tomax or Xamot Junior or Eric, but they're both morons and The Don knows it.  I think that means Ivanka, Jared, or Kimberly Guilfoyle.  

You're probably saying "No way! No one go for want this!" to which I reply "Oh really?"  Think about all the shit DJ Trump pulled over the past 77 years.  You think the people who are willing to tolerate that won't tolerate some nepotism on the bottom of the ticket?

via GIPHY

You don't think DJT would love to roll out "TRUMP/TRUMP" campaign signs?

You heard it here first.  Trump/Trump or Trump/Guilfoyle 2024.

Return of zbouillabaisse

zbouillabaisse, aka zman bouillabaisse (not to be confused with B-Boy Bouillabaisse), is back!  

1. The QAnon Shaman is running for Congress.  Of course he is, because our politics doubles in stupidity every 2 years.  It's zman's law.  Jacob Chansley is running for Arizona's 8th district as a Libertarian.  The current representative, Debbie Lesko, isn't running again and the Shaman is a natural fit to represent Maricopa County.  And he already knows his away around the Capitol.  

2. Nooner, Shocker.  The coach of the Wichita State Shockers' women's basketball team is named Terry Nooner.  We love nooners around here.  Here's Nooner the Shocker giving the shocker.  

A big happy birthday to the one and only Coach @terrynooner! 🎉 pic.twitter.com/BHUkvpZv7T

— Wichita State Women’s Basketball (@GoShockersWBB) November 12, 2023

Can't make this stuff up.  H/t to the DLC. 

3.  I got a heat pump!  That isn't a euphemism, it's a device split between my attic and my back yard that can heat or cool my second floor without burning any fossil fuels, thus solving the problem of my undersized HVAC system that doesn't push air hard enough to reach the bedrooms, allowing me to turn the furnace way down at night but still sleep warmly without burning natural gas, and most importantly, offsetting my carbon footprint so I can drive for pleasure without invoking as much ire from Dave (although I bet the two little cars I drive the most have better fuel economy than Dave's behemoth vehicles).  And I will get a tax credit.

4. "You can't end sex on even numbers."  I'm sure you've seen Terrell Owens and Chad Ochocinqo reminiscing about their 12-hour, 17-woman orgy.  When TO suggests it was only 12 women, Ocho retorts "You can't end sex on even numbers!"  I suppose that's right given my experience--one is an odd number.  It would be nice if these guys did a PSA for PrEP though.  I'm no expert, but if you plan to attend an orgy you should get your shots first.

zman bouillabaisse

More zbouillabaisse!

1. Inspiration from rob

rob's last post motivated me to post Nina Simone's version of House of the Rising Sun.  The last 30-or-so seconds will remind you that she was a classically trained pianist who turned to jazz when she didn't get into Juilliard.  

2. Inspiration from Professor G. Truck

Prof. Truck's recent post motivated me to tell you that many of the old Spider-Man cartoons from our childhood (the 1967 version) are available on Youtube.  zdaughter is into Spider-Man and she likes to watch a video before bedtime and these short cartoons fit the bill perfectly.  New ones go up and get taken down by whoever owns the copyright (Jack Urbont?)--until today they were all available in a playlist but now you have to scroll through them all.  This one reminds me of a scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark.

3. Politicians crack me up

New Hampshire state Rep. James Spillane (no relation to Mickey) endorsed Donald Trump for president in 2024 but has suddenly switched to Ron DeSantis, stating “I can no longer continue endorsing former President Trump. I am officially withdrawing my endorsement, as his most recent attack on Kayleigh McEnany is beyond comprehension and explanation .... Against my deepest hopes that Trump had learned some measure of control, he has attacked those who have been his staunchest supporters with no regard for their loyalty."  

Spillane further opined "The reason being that when I did endorse Trump I thought that he would be able to continue with a positive message, learn from his past mistakes and give us a way forward to continue the policies that he started before … But it’s become evident, especially with the latest attack on Kayleigh McEnany that there’s no loyalty in him.”

To be fair and balanced he added that "The people of NH, and the people of this nation, deserve messages of positivity and hope, not negative attacks and degradation as we have seen is the hallmark of the Biden administration."

Trump's "attack" on McEnany was his calling her a Milktoast (sic) RINO because she said Trump was 25 points ahead of DeSantis in the polls when he thought he was up 34 points.

So just to be clear, Spillane is fine with the coup and extorting Ukraine, but calling Kayleigh McEnany a Milktoast is a bridge too far for him.  I guess we shouldn't be surprised given his history.

Also, Mike Pence joined Sons of Anarchy.

4. Texas cracks me up

Like the citizens in most red-leaning states, many Texans have been conditioned to believe that "The Government" is their enemy, coming to steal their "Freedom!" with malign "Regulations!".

Texans won't stand for that hooey.  For example, Texas proudly deregulated their electricity utilities in 2002.  Electrons need freedom too!  That experiment didn't turn out exactly as expected, but Texans won't get fooled again by slick corporations and their externalities.

Or not.  Elon Musk's Boring Company (boring because they dig tunnels, not because they're dull, get it?) broke ground in Bastrop County Texas and they're running roughshod.  Or perhaps not, depending on your view of Freedom! and Regulations!.  

A local organic farmer commented “Between Elon Musk coming in here and all the sand and gravel mines ... suddenly this bucolic, pastoral prime farmland is now more than a thousand acres of an industrial site. There’s no zoning, there are no rules. It’s the Wild West.”

The local county commissioner replied “This is Texas. This is called property rights. If you own the property and you stay within the state laws, you can pretty much do what you want.”

A local real estate agent perhaps summed up things best when he said “I love Elon, and we need more industry here.  I just don’t want him to dump his poop in the river.”

If only The Government could protect the little guy's Freedom! from Musk's musky dung.  Maybe with some Regulations!.  Nah, that's awful stuff.  

zman Bouillabaise Redux

A few post ideas bubbled up in my meager brain but I never got around to writing them and/or I didn't know what to write so I'm doing another round of zman bouillabaise, which is like b-boy bouillabaisse but not as good.

1. Jacques Tits died.

Here's the introductory paragraph for Jacques Tits's Wikipedia entry: "Jacques Tits (French: [tits]) (12 August 1930 – 5 December 2021) was a Belgian-born French mathematician who worked on group theory and incidence geometry.  He introduced Tits buildings, the Tits alternative, the Tits group, and the Tits metric."

What more needs to be said?

2. The Large Hadron Collider lives.

CERN shut down the LHC in 2018 but it's up and running again.  I don't understand a goddam thing in that link and this is rob's corner anyway.  Just keep an eye out for Armageddon.  

3. The Supreme Court missed the forest for the trees in N.Y. State Rifle & Pistol.

In his opinion holding that "New York’s proper-cause requirement violates the Fourteenth Amendment by preventing law-abiding citizens with ordinary self-defense needs from exercising their Second Amendment right to keep and bear arms in public for self-defense," Justice Alito said:

Does the dissent think that laws like New York’s prevent or deter such atrocities? Will a person bent on carrying out a mass shooting be stopped if he knows that it is illegal to carry a handgun outside the home?  And how does the dissent account for the fact that one of the mass shootings near the top of its list took place in Buffalo? The New York law at issue in this case obviously did not stop that perpetrator.

He's correct.  There is probably no way to prevent criminally insane or evil people from committing mass shootings other than confiscating all guns.  But there is some value in trying to limit the amount of shootings that occur, mass or individual.  By that I mean, I don't want to live in a society where everyone around me could be armed at all times.  I don't want to worry that if I bump into someone at a bar they will shoot me because they are drunk and angry that I spilled their beer; or that if I get into a car accident the other person will put a gun in my face in a fit of road rage; or that I will be shot accidentally because some random doesn't know how to carry a gun properly.

Making it harder for people to carry guns outside the house limits the likelihood that this will happen.  The punishment for carrying without a permit is harsh in NY--just ask Plaxico Burress.  He went to jail for 22 months after accidentally shooting himself in the leg in a nightclub while carrying a pistol without a permit.  By contrast, Michael Vick went to jail for about 18 months for his dogfighting ring, while Donte Stallworth went to jail for 30 days killing a man while driving drunk.

We can argue about the proportionality of these punishments compared to the respective crimes, but we can all agree that we are glad we weren't standing next to Plaxico when he accidentally fired his gun that night, and his punishment hopefully deterred a lot of other people from carrying a gun.  Yes, he was carrying illegally, while this decision is about the limitations a state may place on how to obtain a permit to carry legally.  But I think his story counsels against carrying in general and in favor of serious limitations on who, what, where, why, when and how carrying should be allowed.

That's why New York's "proper cause" requirement for a concealed carry permit made sense and should have been upheld.

4. Any debate whether Trump acted up in the limo or threw a Big Mac misses the forest for the trees.

I don't care if Trump grabbed for the steering wheel or his security guard's neck.  I don't care if he threw a plateful of McDonald's finest meats and cheeses and ketchup at the wall.  He riled up an armed mob and told them to go to the Capitol to "fight like hell."  They took him literally and he wanted them to.  Five people died as a direct result, and at least two killed themselves afterwards.  What more needs to be said?

5. WFMU continues to deliver.

I should do another zShazams post but if I do I won't be able to include "Modern Diseases" by Fifth Column because I can't find it on Spotify.  It isn't on YouTube either so I can't even make a Notify contribution!  You can listen to it on the WMFU playlist site.  Here's a Fifth Column song that you can find on YouTube:

Apparently they were "a Canadian all-female post-punk band from Toronto, formed in the early 1980s."  You too can find nifty stuff on WFMU.org and it's free to stream.

More zman Boulliabaise

I've been to lazy to write any posts but I've had lots of ideas. Here are a few.

1. Colin Quinn: The New York Story is on Netflix and it's funny. New Yorkers will love it and people from outside New York will understand why New Yorkers act the way they do. It's worth 60 minutes of your time.

2. You should watch The Chi. Sometimes it's like The Wire, other times it's like What's Happening!!, at all times it's good. It's written by Lena Waithe (from Master of None) and it stars Kima from The Wire, Ronsel from Mudbound, Mister June from True Detective, and a kid who is Rerun's spiritual successor.

via GIPHY

3. Malcolm Gladwell! Eddie Alterman! Autonomous cars? Keep an eye out for "Autonomy," coming soon to iTunes.



4. You should read The Bulwark. It's a website full of good writing by smart people who maintain a pre-2016 conservative worldview. Bill Kristol is the editor-in-chief. I estimate that 90% of the articles involve grinding axes against Donald Trump and his bootlickers. There are also well-reasoned think pieces addressing things like flaws in Elizabeth Warren's Medicare for All plan and Middle East policy. These pieces are thoughtful and respectful. Taken together with the other left-leaning stuff I read it's a decent approximation of the Washington Post op-ed section 15 years ago. I miss that.

5. You should sign up for The Dispatch. It's a daily email newsletter written by a couple of guys who defected from National Review when it went full Trump. You can sign up here for free. It's completely self-funded by the authors and by donations from readers. Bare bones, no pictures. It's like The Bulwark only it covers a broader range of stuff.

6. You should listen to Roy Ayers. He's been buried in my iPod for years without getting any run. zson wanted to listen to something he never heard before so I put it on. Everybody sampled him. His shit is dope.





7. X Clan still holds up. Speaking of sampling Roy Ayers, I haven't listened to X Clan in over 20 years until this weekend and they still bang.



This song was oddly prescient ...

More zman Bouilliabaisse

1. Ron Weasley is a gangster

The kid who played Ron Weasley in the Harry Potter movies now plays a gangster in the TV show “Snatch.” It’s extremely loosely based on the movie “Snatch”—many grimy Britons, a little boxing, and lots of crime. It’s ultimately a comedy though, so all the capers go pear-shaped and the main characters are constantly scrambling to avoid getting nicked by the polis or turned over by bigger sharks. It’s a fun 47 minute diversion from reality. Sony’s American subsidiary produces the show so no one’s accent is so thick that you need subtitles to decipher what they’re saying. You can stream it for free on Crackle.



2. Go Ahead in the Rain

I’m trying to read more this year so I read “Go Ahead in the Rain” by Hanif Abdurraqib. It’s a short and well-written read about A Tribe Called Quest, their music and their impact on the author’s life. Sometimes it’s an album review, sometimes it’s a history lesson. Other times it’s an autobiography, cultural commentary on the meaning of everything. Perhaps most uniquely, in a few places it’s letters written directly to individual band members. It won’t change your life but I recommend it if you like Tribe, hiphop, music, or good writing.



3. Another playlist for Connell

Abdurraqib drops tons of 1990’s music references in his book, so much so that I became motivated to dig through the crates and put together another playlist for Connell. I told Connell I would do this last summer but I didn’t because I’m simultaneously lazy and overworked. But here it is, better late than never. Rather than go “bangin old school” I went “smoothed-out old school.” Enjoy.

Let’s Ride
Honeydips in Gotham
Who Got Da Props
Jive Talk
Fortified Live
After Hours
Passing Me By
Memory Lane
Straighten It Out
Just the Two of Us
Funky Lemonade
Buddy
Form of Intellect
Ya Know How it Goes
Where I’m From
40 Acres and My Props
The Truth

zBouillabaise Returns

I have a few random items floating around in my head that seem post-worthy but aren't substantial enough to warrant my typical overly-long treatment, so I'm doing another zbouillabaise post.

1. "Station Wagon" by Hector's Pets has been stuck in my head since I heard it on WFMU this weekend. I bought their lone album, "Pet-O-Feelia"--they're essentially a Ramones tribute band with a great fondness for doo-wop. The result is a lot of lo-fi garage rock with heavy guitar riffs and pulsating background vocals. It's fun.



2. Speaking of station wagons, there's some weird arbitrage going on at various Jaguar dealers. The XF Sportbrake is a 380 horsepower rocket sled masquerading as a station wagon. The MSRP starts at $71,000 and can balloon over $80,000 depending on how you option it up. There are a number of XF Sportbrakes available for at or under $60,000, including one for $53,000 in Houston and one for $58,000 in White Plains. I contacted the White Plains dealer about this one and two other Sportbrakes they had back in July. They still have two of the three on the lot. I'm not saying you should buy a Jaguar, but if you're like me and you like longroofs (looking at you Squeaky) and you're in the market for a new one, you can get a supercharged V6 Jaguar for the price of a turbocharged I4 Volvo V90. If not less--there is only one Caesium Blue XF Sportbrake for sale new in America right now (it's in Atlanta) and when I emailed the dealer for a price quote they responded within 4 minutes, then followed up 15 minutes later to remind me that the keys are out waiting for me to take a test drive. Simply put, no one wants these cars so you can find yourself some extremely good values and you might be able to gouge the dealers down even further. What this really means is that in two years the market for CPO Sportbrakes will be soft as hell. And who wouldn't want to get a good deal on this?

If only they made them in British Racing Green ...

3. Unrelated to station wagons, and perhaps the polar opposite of Hector's Pets, I've also been listing to Jungle's new album "For Ever." Unlike Hector's Pets' DIY sound, "For Ever" appears to have been Zaratsu polished to impossible smoothness. If I were a cynic I would say that the whole album is prefabricated for commercials advertising luxury goods and the closing credits of prestige TV. But I'm not so instead I'll say it sounds like a cross between electronica and Yacht Rock with some Lovage thrown in for good measure.



Maybe some Gnarls Barkley too.



4. You know those "Little Trees" air fresheners that you hang from the rear view mirror so your car don't smell? The company that makes those trees sued Bob Ross's estate for trademark infringement because they sell "Happy Trees" and "Happy Little Trees" air fresheners that allegedly look confusingly similar to the "Little Trees" air fresheners. I love Bob Ross as much as the next guy (well maybe not as much as Teedge) and I want to take his side but this is pretty egregious.

5. My beloved Buffalo Bills are on pace to score 184 points and to give up 624 points. That's a -440 point differential. Only seven teams have scored less than 184 points in 16 games. Only two teams have ever allowed more than 500 points (the 2008 Lions with 517 and the 1981 Colts with 533). So the Bills might be historically bad on both sides of the ball, and they're currently on pace to be the worst defense ever by 91 points. Since the merger, no team has had a point differential worse than -287 (the 1976 Buccaneers). A -440 point differential would be unfathomably bad. But we might have to fathom it--here's the rest of Buffalo's schedule: @MIN, @GB, TEN, @HOU, @IND, NE, CHI, @NYJ, BYE, JAX, @MIA, NYJ, DET, @NE, MIA. Not a lot of gimmes on that slate.

6. What part of the Constitutiom says that the President can’t appoint a Supreme Court Justice during an election year, but he or she can make such an appointment while being an unindicted co-conspirator for a federal crime?

Return of zman Bouillabaise

Here are a few things I've seen or heard or thought about that I didn't have time to turn into a post or weren't really big enough to turn into a post.

1. Ghost & Meth & Comey?

Ghostface Killah and Method Man somehow or other met James Comey. I'll make like Zuckerberg and let you create the content in the comments. Just no homey/Comey jokes please.

Me and my brother @methodmanofficial Workin on getting that album back from the feds... wu Tang forever @comey

A post shared by Tony Starks - Wu Tang - (@realghostfacekillah) on Apr 17, 2018 at 4:30pm PDT

2. I figured out what to get Mark for Christmas

zmother gets her Christmas shopping done around August, certainly no later than September. She hates Christmas shopping so she gets it done early. Holidays are always fun in zhome! I'm less of a Scrooge and don't get started until December, unless I see something that screams out to be gifted to someone in particular. Like these socks for Mark.

Or these for Whit. Or maybe these for TR. Or these for Squeaky. Or these for Teedge. Even rob.

Feel free to get me these. There are lots of other bizarre/amazing Stance socks too.

3. Check out Caroline Rose's new album LONER

Sometimes it sounds like Foster the People.





Other times it sounds like the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.



Still others it sounds kinda like the Killers.



4. Watch "The Americans"

We're very late to the party on this one, but if you haven't watched The Americans you should. It's all available on Amazon Prime and it's all good.

One of the interesting aspects of The Sopranos was the idea that a murderous gangster comes home from work and has to deal with all the same mundane and difficult stuff as everyone else--his son gets bad grades and acts a fool, his wife spends too much money, his mother breaks his balls, his sister is out of control, and so on. The Sopranos made this dynamic clear right from the start of episode 1 and carried it through to the end.

The Americans spins this theme. Every marriage has difficulties, or at least things happen in any marriage that make things difficult. For Philip and Elizabeth Jennings, they not only have to deal with their kids' undesirable behaviors, they sometimes have to figure out how to dispose of dead bodies or weaponized bacteria because they're Russian spies. The tension between them as partners-in-crime serving their Motherland and as husband and wife is set out from the start and makes the show engaging throughout.

For example, we don't do dentistry like this in zhome.

zman Bouillabaise

I've been meaning to post a couple of things but haven't had the time to do a fulsome job so you're getting more zbouillabaise.

1. adidas stands for "all day I dream about Sketchers"

adidas received a preliminary injunction against Sketchers because Sketchers ripped off their Stan Smiths. I was really excited about this collision of sneakers and IP law, and I was going to write a lengthy post about trademarks and trade dress and what they are and how they work but all you need to know to decide this case is this:

I think the rule the judge applied was "you can't rip people off like that."

2. A Porsche cartoon!

The Porsche 911 is a pretty goofy design. The engine is in the back with a significant amount of weight behind the rear wheels. This setup is great for straight-line acceleration and braking, but it's a nightmare if you want to make a turn. Just ask Rootsy!

Regardless, I will own a 911 before I die. But which one? And does it really matter? As you can see from the video below, the 911 hasn't really changed that much over the past 50+ years (aside from the shift to water-cooled engines in 1999 which made a lot of Porsche fans clutch their pearls, and I'm not a snob about cooling systems).



I'll take mine in Gulf Blue.

3. Macklemore made a song with DJ Premier and KRS-ONE?

Macklemore released a new song yesterday called Buckshot. I was more than a little surprised to see that it was produced by DJ Premier and features a verse by KRS-ONE. If you aren't familiar with Premier, KRS, or their collaborations, you should check out Return of the Boom Bap. You'll thank me. Just ask Rootsy!

Primo hasn't lost a step and the Blastmaster will always be the Blastmaster. I just never expected them to appear on a Macklemore record. Which isn't to say I have any problems with Macklemore, but I wouldn't think that KRS-ONE would offer up 64 bars of hot fiyah to a guy with songs like "White Privilege" and "White Privilege II." This makes me feel even better about paying $15 for KRS's last album on Bandcamp when he was only asking for $10--it's so hard out there he's taking money from Macklemore.



I gotta admit it's a pretty good song though. Once again, Big Daddy Kane is right.