Headed out of Terre Haute in the morning of our third day and into a thick, pervasive fog. The mood was better than the weather, as my kid rolled out a dope alt-rock-country Spotify mix of her own making for the morning.
Indiana's roads were less than excellent, and our little Hyundai Elantra bucked and bounced over I-70's pitted pavement. Not far from the Ohio border, we started seeing billboards for Uranus Fudge Factory. The first read "The Best Fudge Comes From Uranus". It got better, or at least sillier, from there. We managed to capture this billboard:
I encourage you to peruse the website linked above, which includes headings like 'Everything You Need is In Uranus', 'Fudge Packer Favorites', 'We Love to Pack Your Fudge', and 'A Taste of Uranus' among many, many other similarly juvenile and delicious marketeering wordplay. The red states may be going full Handmaid's Tale, but they seem to enjoy puns, so, cool?
Once we got into Ohio, the roads got so much smoother, almost as if government prioritizing certain public accommodations can actually impact things in a positive way. You're not here to listen to an aging liberal whine. Bygones.
Things progressed without incident until we left the Greater Columbus environs. About an hour outside Ohio's capital, I glanced in my rearview and saw a hurlyburly of police lights rapidly gaining on me. I slid into the right lane and watched a late model pickup truck blast past me followed by five police vehicles.
The chase continued for the better part of an hour. Every so often, the road would straighten and we could see the procession off in the distance, the twinkling lights on the cruisers gathering strengths as several other cars joined the party. On a couple of occasions, police vehicles would drop back from the chase and try to slow the traffic on the highway down. At another point, we saw an officer with a spike strip fail to deploy it in time, looking forlornly down the highway as his missed opportunity sped down the road.
Finally, we came around a bend and saw the police caravan stopped by the side of the road, many guns drawn, and officers deployed in tactical positions with weapons pointed down from the highway into a ravine, long guns braced on the guardrail. You can see a little of it in the video linked here, because I can't figure out how to embed it, with our (my) excited commentary. Here's a still:
Friends, that's the craziest thing I've ever seen on a highway, and I've watched FOG:TB DDS Laster try to drive a car. My kid didn't think it was all that interesting, but she's an idiot.
That idiot drove us the final four hours home, which let me watch some golf and text with some Gheorghies, so she's not all bad.
Made it home in 10 hours flat with some inefficient stops. As always, any experiences beyond the time spent with my increasingly open kid are a bonus. That we got fudge puns and cops on parade was more than I could've expected.
A lot of folks I spoke to in the run-up to my cross-country car trip expressed surprise and even concern that my daughter and I were making the run from Leesburg, VA to Boulder, CO. I confess to being a bit confused by this reaction. I get to spend three days alone with my kid and see parts of the country we'd never seen? Cool! Sign me up.
Maybe I'd have gone for one of those fancy Sprinter vans or something, instead of a 2013 Hyundai Elantra with 142,000 miles and a non-functioning driver's side sun visor, but that's just a quibble. "Jean", as the car is known, was a champ. And so was my kid.
Here's the way it went down:
Leg One: Leesburg, VA to South Bend, IN
This was the longest of our three legs, weighing in at 569 miles. The costliest, too, as the EZPass folks stung us for $32.42. We hit the road at 6:24 am, looking sprightly, though my kid slept for the first three hours because she has a habit of not sleeping if she has an early wakeup call.
We took Route 15 to Route 70/76, passing through a little bit of Virginia before traveling across Maryland, Pennsylvania, and Ohio before entering Indiana. Made our first stop at a rest area just over the Pennsylvania border in Ohio for gas and a wee potty break.
We stopped for lunch at 1:08 at a rest stop somewhere in the middle of Ohio. It was under construction, and the only fresh food option was Hardees. I settled for a packaged turkey and cheese sammich, because Hardees. Grabbed some spicy pickle chips, too, and proceeded to spill most of the juice on myself. Pretty disappointing effort.
The kidlet drove the rest of the way, and we caught some pretty heavy rain entering South Bend. Put a serious kibosh on our plans (my plans, really - the kid would've been happy to vegetate in the hotel room) to wander the Notre Dame campus. I've got some letters to write, because my daughter was nonplussed with the road conditions in Ohio.
Hampton Inn, bringing the funny
We arrived at 3:51, a total elapsed time of 10:17, including three stops.
For entertainment, we listened to a playlist I made, then a chill country-ish playlist of my daughter's making, and a punk/emo vibe to bring us into town. We supped at O'Rourke's (it's a solid Irish pub) in the shadow of Notre Dame stadium, then toured the athletic campus (My Lord in Heaven, but their football practice facility is absurd) in a futile attempt to roll up to Touchdown Jesus. We could see him, but we couldn't figure out how to get close. The Lord, it seems, had forsaken us.
Leg Two: South Bend, IN to Omaha, NE
We got up to watch the second half of the USWNT/Sweden match, and jumped in the car at the end of regulation so we could listen to the rest, hitting the road at 7:08 am after a stop at Biggby for coffee and iced chai. We heard to the overtime/shootout in a driving rainstorm that let up about when we crossed over into Illinois.
If we didn't want to, we could've made the entire trip without taking a turn, once we left South Bend. We took 80 West the whole way, fast and flat.
We listened to 'Car' - the cleverly-titled playlist Whitney made - and a One Direction playlist of my daughter's design, where I failed repeatedly at identifying which of the lads were singing.
My daughter, who I learned is an aggro driver, took the last shift again, and brought us into Omaha at 2:30 pm local time. 541 miles knocked out in 8:22.
We stayed across the street from Charles Schwab Field, where the College Baseball World Series has been held since 2011 - the banners from the 2023 event are still hung.
The area around the stadium is clearly in the midst of a revival, with a number of baseball themed bars and restaurants mixed in with coffee shops, new-looking apartment complexes and a handful of hotels.
Took a quick tour of Creighton University, which was about six blocks from our hotel. It's kinda meh. We had a good dinner at Blatt (named in homage to Johnny Rosenblatt Stadium, where the CWS used to be contested), which included a quite good hazy IPA called Fairy Nectar from Kros Strain Brewing in La Vista, NE. On our way to dinner, my kid and I raced up the steps at Schwab. She won. Gonna chalk it up to not wanting to fall on my face or dirty my new Air Max 90 Terrascapes.
Leg Three: Omaha, NE to Boulder, CO
We watched some of Australia's 2-0 WWC win over Denmark, grabbed a cuppa from Rally Coffee (much recommend), and hit the road at 7:08 am for the second day in a row. If it ain't broke, and all that.
My kid is not one that laughs easily, and her default mode where I'm concerned is eyeroll. So I was pleased in no small measure when I made her laugh out loudly at length by inventing the International Symbol For...which was a derivation of a long-ago birthed signal for getting free chips, no pay at La Tolteca in Williamsburg. That laughter might've made the whole trip worth it.
I'm an excellent photographer
We took 80 West to 76 West to 36 into Boulder. Nebraska was much more interesting than I expected, replete with lakes, rivers, creeks, museums, wide open spaces waving green and gold.
Stopped for lunch at a Wendy's in Oglalla, NE, right before we crossed into the Mountain time zone, because we needed to pee. I had a ghost pepper chicken sandwich that was flavorful and actually hot, unlike so many mass market 'spicy' foods. Made my eyelids sweat and all.
After much debate and a small wager, we saw the Rockies for the first time about an hour from Denver, at which point we played Rocky Mountain High at my kid's request. We sang loudly and not particularly well.
The scenery changed almost immediately as soon as we crossed into Colorado, the flat of Illinois, Iowa, and Nebraska heaving up into spectacular vistas. Gorgeous.
We switched from music to podcasts on this leg. Heard the latest We Defy Augury, a silly and funny episode of the Try Guys podcast, a couple Smartless episodes, and an interview of Niall Horan by Zack Sang.
Like the first two days, the kid took the final shift behind the wheel, and we rolled into Boulder just after 2:00 pm local time. Took us 7:52 to traverse the 555 miles from Omaha. Ate at a little joint on The Hill, which is CU's bar district, and relaxed.
All in all, it was a remarkably easy trip, and my kid and I had a really excellent time together - that ain't always the case between two stubborn people. To be honest, the only thing I really worried about when others expressed concern about the length of the trip was whether we'd spend 1,655 miles and 26 some-odd hours in a car together in silence. I needn't have worried.
We'll probably get to do that trip a few more times, since we'll need to get that car back and forth from Colorado to Virginia for a couple more years. I'm sure we'll hit some headwinds in future journeys. But I'm feeling blessed to have had that much time with my little girl, and eager for the next opportunity.
I failed to properly thank Zman for touting Les Coole and the Cukes recently. Cheers, mate.
Zed really teed up the Tiny Dictator and all you other road-trippers, commuters, and other bored listeners with some good extended-play sonic soul-quenching. Honestly, marathon trip that it is, you've got more music than time ready and waiting for you, rob.
Just remember what that strange bird Luis once quipped to me... you know, that special variety of advice that somehow lasts for 30 years in my noggin: "I just say FIDO... Fuck it, drive on."
Drive on, indeed.
...if you're so motivated, drop a public playlist on the Spotify to keep us engaged.
Well, you posted that ask last week, and that there is a #10 tin can o' worms and such that you opened for me. I went to work straightaway. And threw a whole mess of tunes into it.
What it became is the equivalent of "Clean Out the Walk-In Soup" at the diner. What it's intended to be is an eclectic set of sounds for you to play straight through, shuffle, skip about within, and (I hope) enjoy.
I tried to include songs you've never heard, or at least haven't heard in a long while. May or may not have succeeded at that.
At the very least, it's a time-eater.
I hereby present to you for your aural consideration
257 (and growing) songs
that occupy
17 hours and 20 minutes (and growing)
I worked very hard to come up with a clever name for this Public Playlist on Spotify. Well, I just named it "Car" at the outset and left it like many a roadside clunker for sale... As Is.
Safe travels, and I'll be curious to see if any of these tunes stick with you.
As many of you know, I'll be driving my youngest back to college in a little more than three weeks. We'll be leaving Leesburg, VA on August 5, and have to be in Boulder, CO by 4:00 local time on August 7 so she can make the Buffs' first cheer practice of the Coach Prime era. I assume he'll stop by.
I'm warming up for that 1,678 mile, 25-hour trip by doing some light driving on the East Coast in the days prior. To wit (and to Whit), I'm headed to Richmond on the first to see my kid do her first-ever poetry reading, then to Norfolk on the second to pre-game for OBFT XXX, then to the Outer Banks for a far-too-brief overnighter at the aforementioned beach extravaganza, then back to NoVA on the fourth to back before we hit the road for Colorado.
Now is the moment I seek the assistance of the assembled community of Gheorghies. I have a few requests.
First, I'm looking for advice on things to see, eat, and drink along our route west. Our first stop is in South Bend, Indiana. If we leave on time, we should get there around 5:00 local time. We're staying in a hotel about half a mile from the Notre Dame campus, which I've never seen. So that's a bit of a no-brainer, but if you have recommendations for good grub and cold pops in and around the campus, and any must-see sights (like Touchdown Jesus), I'm all ears.
We roll out of South Bend and through Illinois and Iowa before stopping for our second night in Omaha. Our hotel is right across the street from Charles Schwab Field, home of the NCAA College Baseball World Series and just a few blocks from Creighton University. I've been to Omaha once, years ago, and I don't really remember much about it other than it's pretty brown. If you've got ideas for things to do, see, and eat that don't include beef (I don't dig on the cow), hit me up.
Our run finishes across the plains, as we go through most of Nebraska before we get into Colorado. I'm guessing it'll be flat, so it's important that we have ways to entertain ourselves. I've been working on a few playlists, for example. But if Mark wants to add to the Tiny Dictator rap primer with some new stuff, I wouldn't complain. And if Dave could record a bunch of new 'We Defy Augury' episodes, I'd be much obliged. As for the rest of you, any ideas for podcasts that might appeal to a middle-aged dad and a 19 year-old college sophomore would be welcomed. Or if you're so motivated, drop a public playlist on the Spotify to keep us engaged.
And if there's a giant ball of twine or a local version of Wall Drug out there on the path between Leesburg and Boulder, you gotta let me know about it.
Last year was a bit challenging for me in a handful of ways. Family illness, divorce #2, got no jack, blah blah blah. There's no time to feel sorry for yourself in a world brimming with sad events and sorrow, but I probably did.
But music is solace, especially if you can emotionally compartmentalize like I can. A good rock show cures what ails you for two to four hours at a time. Festivals even moreso. And against some odds, I did manage to make it to a boatload of good concerts last year. As I recall, in order:
Badfish
Wilco
Widespread Panic
Pink Talking Fish
Jimmy Buffett
Pearl Jam
Jason Isbell
Violent Femmes
The Wailers
Avett Brothers
Bruce Springsteen
English Beat / Squeeze
Old 97's
The Cult
Drive-By Truckers
Thus far this year I have caught three of those same bands once again, plus Ween, Green Day, Trombone Shorty, U2's Joshua Tree tour, Lionel Richie, the Australian Pink Floyd Show, and a ton of bands at JazzFest in New Orleans. Plus some local acts. And the Random Idiots uncorked session in Norfolk pre-OBFT. And drumming on my desk when I'm bored.
Seems like a lot. But never enough, I guess, because there's more on the docket. Who's with me?
Okay, I'll be more specific. I began to assemble a list of bands heading to the area over the next few months. Then "the area" expanded, since we've journeyed far and wide for the right rock concert in the past. And then I thought I'd have some fun with it and threw in my estimated percentage chance of attending each show. And some bands I likely will not see. Ever.
Note... that percentage figure increases substantially if other gheorghies are going to go. Some recall the mini-summit of 2013 in NJ for the Old 97's/DBT's show. No fewer than 4 GTBers ganged up for that one. Let's do this. Apologies to Mark, Squeaky, and others geographically displaced from my town. Though I will friggin travel for the right show.
Also... what is up with the explosion of music venues in DC now? I leave town and they pop up like an outbreak of... whatever that is down there. Used to be the Verizon Center for big acts, the 9:30 Club for mid-majors, and the Black Cat and such for the littl'uns. Now: Rock & Roll Hotel, Hamilton Live, The Anthem, Hill Country Barbecue Market, U Street Music Hall, Sixth & I Historic Synagogue (??), Lincoln Theatre, and a place near the old Bayou called Gypsy Sally's -- each of which have bands I listen to playing there. Kind of awesome, kind of wtf.
Anywho... come join me for some musical shenanigans, won't you?
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