In a far more timely episode than in my post about the nominees announcement, I bring you sort of, kind of, semi-breaking news. The 2022 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductees!
Look, I know there are far more pressing, important, newsworthy, debate-worthy topics right now. I also know there are far more depressing, scary, terrible things we could be discussing. How about rock and roll and a committee of propped-up Judgy Judgersons judging people's art and influence to make grand decisions about their merit for inclusion in a special club of artists? Sounds like the right amount of light fare to me!
So . . . it should be pretty fresh in your minds whom the nominees were. Who got in?
Let's start with who did not get the nod.
Beck didn't get in! Wow. I'm sure somewhere out there some yuk-yuk has a "Beck, Loser" joke, but I won't make it. Anyway, I called Beck a "lock" in my predictions, and boy, was I wrong. Everybody's got to learn sometime. I've heard some speculate that he's still young and active enough that the Hall wanted to wait a while, but the Chili Peppers got in a decade ago, and they put a chart-topping album out last month. Anyway, where's it's at for Beck is on the waiting list.
A Tribe Called Quest. Sorry, Z. I'm sure they aren't buggin' out about this scenario, and I'm sure the Hall will find a way to let them in. Not as first-balloters.
Kate Bush, Dionne Warwick, Fela Kuti. Nothing clever here. I thought Ms. Warwick was in, but then again, I thought she was already in when she got nominated last year. Oh, well.
Rage Against the Machine. Morello on the committee, as it turns out, doesn't turn the tide. At least you gheorghies who are seeing them play in August may see some added... rage.
Devo. It's the long, uphill trudge to see these lovable nerds get in. I'll still fight the fight, but it may not ever happen. The myth that all they did was "Whip It" is exactly that.
And now . . . drum roll, please.
Who got in?
Well, Dolly Parton did. If Donny and Marie are a little bit country and a little bit rock and roll, well, Dolly's a whole hell of a lot the former and not so much the latter. That was the mini-controversy that popped up when she gracefully bowed out and the Hall gracelessly kept her on the ballot. Eh... she's awesome, and she said she will accept the induction, anyway. (Fast fact: she got into the Country Music Hall of Fame 23 years ago.)
Listen: Everyone knows "Jolene," "9 to 5," and "Islands in the Stream," but don't sleep on pop pleasure like 1977's "Here You Come Again."
Duran Duran! Yes. I enjoyed this band when they first hit US radio stations and MTV when I was 12. I played them loudly from the fraternity house suite when their compilation CD Decade was released in 1989. And took heat for it. I liked their "comeback album" . . . which was way back in 1993. Hell, I still enjoy their tunes. I will say that their cover of "911 Is a Joke" should be buried deep, deep in a mud hole never to be excavated. I'm psyched for this selection. Fast Fact: their name comes from the villain in the movie Barbarella, best known for an inane outer space plot and Jane Fonda nudity.
Listen: All the hits remain fun for me to hear, but even more enjoyable is digging into lesser knowns like "Careless Memories," "The Chauffeur," "New Religion," and "Shadows on Your Side."
Eurythmics. Also happy for them, and I didn't even see it coming. They're both brilliant artists, writers, producers, musicians. I thought the Eurythmics proper catalog might be light, but who am I to disagree?
Listen: "Would I Lie to You?" and "Here Comes the Rain Again"; but really, do this. Turn your volume up. Like high. And play "Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)." Here that bass drum and keys, followed quickly by everyone's first introduction to Annie Lennox's voice. And imagine that with her spiky red hair, that video threw everyone way off in 1983. Whoa. Actually, don't imagine it; watch it below. Loud.
Pat Benatar. Hell yes. She came on the scene with "Hit Me with Your Best Shot," and she was relentless for most of the 80's. Her look was mimicked by high school girls on a level higher than Cyndi, higher than Belinda, only exceeded by Madonna. The Brooklyn-born artist formerly known as Patricia Mae Andrzejewski is inducted with her bandmate, co-writer, and husband, Neil Geraldo. You want to read a random (cool) rise to fame?
- Benatar trained as a coloratura with plans to attend the Juilliard School, but decided instead to pursue health education at Stony Brook University.
- At 19, after one year at Stony Brook, she dropped out to marry her first husband, high school sweetheart Dennis Benatar, a U.S. Army draftee who was stationed at Fort Lee, Virginia, starting in 1973.
- Pat Benatar worked as a bank teller near Richmond, Virginia. She quit her job to pursue a singing career after being inspired by a Liza Minnelli concert she saw in Richmond.
- She had a gig at a Holiday Inn and got a job as a singing waitress at a nightclub named the Roaring Twenties. The band gained in popularity and was the subject of a never-aired PBS special. Her last significant gig in Richmond was a two-hour performance at Thomas Jefferson High School.
- Dennis was discharged from the Army and the couple moved to New York in May 1975 so Pat could pursue a singing career. Benatar performed at an amateur night at the comedy club Catch a Rising Star in New York.
- In late 1975 she landed the part of Zephyr in Harry Chapin's futuristic rock musical, The Zinger, which ran for a month in 1976 at the Performing Arts Foundation's Playhouse in Huntington Station, Long Island.
- Halloween 1977 proved a pivotal night in Benatar's early, spandexed stage persona. She entered a Halloween contest at the Café Figaro in Greenwich Village dressed as a character from the film Cat-Women of the Moon. Later that evening, she went onstage at Catch a Rising Star still in costume.
- Between appearances at Catch a Rising Star, she recorded commercial jingles for Pepsi-Cola and a number of regional brands. She headlined New York City's Tramps nightclub over four days in spring 1978, where her performance was heard by representatives from several record companies. She was signed to Chrysalis Records by co-founder Terry Ellis the following week.
- Pat and Dennis Benatar divorced shortly after that, although she kept his surname.
She also sang what I consider a Top 5 Bond theme songs, as paired with Marvin Hamlisch's killer music. I think it's up there with "Live and Let Die," "Goldfinger," "All Time High," and . . wait for it . . . "A View to a Kill" by Duran Duran! Two Bond themists in one class! Brilliant. (It edges out "For Your Eyes Only" and "Skyfall.") Anyway, there is only one way to hear "Nobody Does It Better": by watching this clip followed immediately by this clip. I looked and couldn't find one clip with the whole bit.
Listen for it. Answer below.
Listen: You already know. And while the two LP albums are tip-top, I always think of Teej when I hear "Just Lose It," and how he commented in this space that Marshall Mathers had gone off the deep end. Um... also... and you can't make this shit up... he did a cover of "Mockingbird"... in his way. Wow.
Lionel Richie. Hello... it's this guy you were looking for. Look, I don't know how you can completely, thoroughly separate the man from his former band and their all-star output, but that's what the Hall was asked to do. Solo performer content only. Yeah, right, It's like asking for something to be stricken from the record. It's in my brain, man! And "Sail On" is probably among Top 10 f-u breakup songs of all time. ("You're So Vain" and "Hell Is for Children" might make the list as well.) Anyway, listen to the Commodores first, but then dig back into 80's chart-toppers from the man, the myth, the legendary Lionel.
Listen: "Running with the Night," "You Are," "Truly," "Stuck On You," and of course, for old times' sake, "All Night Long." Tom bo li de say de moi ya. Yeah, jambo jumbo.
Judas Priest. Judas Fucking Priest. This would be fantastic except for one thing. They gave them the LL Cool J side door treatment. I repeat: The Award for Musical Excellence shall be given to artists, musicians, songwriters and producers whose originality and influence creating music have had a dramatic impact on music. Crap. I have told you this and told you this. Anyway, it's worth cranking some Priest and giving the Hall the finger. And the PMRC. And Beavis. And Butt-Head.
Listen: "Living After Midnight," "The Hellion/Electric Eye," "The Sentinel," "Screaming for Vengeance," "Heading Out to the Highway," and the MTV classic "You've Got Another Thing Coming," and of course . . .
How'd I do this go-around?
To close it out, here's the answer to the other trivia question, the one about who sings along with Carly in the chorus on "You're So Vain." Can you hear it?
Mick Jagger. The one and only. I can't listen to this song and not hear him any more.
Enjoy!
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