Don't Go In The Water

Several of us are getting together this weekend to catch the Cocaine Bear documentary in a local theater. It's been a long time coming - we first mentioned cocaine bear here in January 2011 in a post by Mark about the college football national championship game. It's immensely gratifying to see our hard work and dedication pay off.

Now that we've taken the bear to the masses, it seems we've got a new mission.

In early February, authorities in New Zealand seized more than three tons of cocaine wrapped in water-tight bales and floating in the Pacific Ocean. Shortly thereafter, Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern resigned. Coincidence? Almost certainly. 

The coke was meant to be picked up by distributors and smuggled into the country. With an estimated street value of $315m (U.S.), the volume was enough to supply Australia for a year (and New Zealand for three decades - the Kiwis need to up their blow game).

In and of itself, the bust is noteworthy, but I wouldn't be writing about it here without something else causing me to sit up and take notice.

A couple of years ago, Mexican authorities found a ton of cocaine stuffed into frozen shark carcasses.

At first glance, these two law enforcement actions don't seem particularly connected. Until I came upon this genius bit of filmmaking.

Bears are scary enough. But friends, be very wary the next time you head to the ocean. We're talking fucking cocaine sharks! Cocaine. Sharks. I don't even wanna know what kind of carnage will follow.