Even More Definitive (and Prolix) World Cup Analysis!

After Steven Gerrard blew past Ricardo Clark in the fourth minute, the US soccer team looked to be in BIG trouble, but they quickly regained their composure.  In fact, though England appeared more dangerous in their offensive thrusts, the US team showed that their skill level is on par with the best teams in the world.  In fact, it will only take some minor adjustments to get the team ready for Slovenia.  For example:

You might recall the sequence when North Brunswick native Tim Howard cannily hurled the ball to Carlos Bocanegra, who elegantly brought the ball to his feet, then nonchalantly tapped it back to Oguchi Onyewu, who completed the switch through the back by playing a crisp pass to Steve Cherundolo. Then Cherundolo turned up field and played a perspicacious ball to the side line, where Landon Donovan trapped, attempted to turn, but was repelled and so turned back.  He wisely knocked it back to to Cherundolo and then moved to space.  Cherundolo sagaciously probed the middle with a ball to Michael Bradley and Bradley took several cunning touches before playing a support ball to Onyewu.  Onyewu played a sincere* one touch pass to Jay DeMerit.  Demerit attempted a brazen long ball down the line, but it was knocked out by an assiduous English player.  DeMerit threw the ball in and Clint Dempsey altruistically** knocked it back to him on the one touch.  DeMerit took several crafty touches, then passed it back to Dempsey.  Dempsey touched the ball twice with the inside of his foot, then once with the outside*** then played to Bradley.  Bradley cleverly played the ball back to Dempsey, who had a better view of the field.  Dempsey cogently knocked it back to Cherundolo.  Cherundolo, under pressure from an indignant Rooney, who was frustrated that he had not received the ball in a while, passed it to DeMerit.  DeMerit played an omniscient ball through to Bradley, and then Bradley salaciously dribbled ten yards or so into English territory.  Donovan began emphatically streaking down the wing and Bradley touched the ball three times and then stridently played a long ball to the outside.  Donovan was called off-sides.  I discreetly went to the bathroom. As I returned, I saw Robbie Findley clairvoyantly snag John Terry's pass to Steven Gerrard.  Findley then judiciously knocked the ball wide to Clint Dempsey.  Dempsey courageously passed the ball back to Cherundolo.  Cherundolo decisively knocked it to Onyewu who dictatorially knocked it to Bocanegra.  Bocanegra defiantly knocked it back to Onyewu, and Onyewu bravely knocked it back to Bocanegra. Bocanegra attempted to slip past Frank Lampart but the ball slid out of bounds.****

* It might have been an earnest pass. I can't remember.

** Unless he was expecting the ball back again.  In that case, it was a selfish pass. We'll never know.

***  It might have been twice with the outside and then once with the inside-- I was very drunk.

**** This entire description is suspect.  As I mentioned, I was very drunk.

Do you remember this?  My question is, when Onyewu played the effervescent one touch pass to Bocanegra, why didn't Donovan diligently move forward in space, so that Bradley could have dribbled stochastically instead of rigidly, and then perhaps Donovan could have been a bit less zealous in his run and not been called off-sides, and if Cherundolo had telepathically overlapped, then the US squad would have had numbers and, perhaps-- and this is only hypothetical, of course, but perhaps they would have gotten a shot or at least a cross out of this sequence.  This is the kind of thinking and vocabulary the US team is going to need if it is going to move out of group play and into the knock-out rounds.