On the eighth day of Gheorghemas
Big Gheorghe gave to me...
Big Gheorghe gave to me...
Eight Amazing Quotes from Barbie (A Shlara Joint)
Seven Weeks of Sobriety*
I loved everything about the Barbie movie: the story, the way it looked, the dialogue, the music, the wardrobe, the overt and subtle jokes, the acting, the jumpsuits, all the pink. It. Is. Brilliant.
The director and writer, Greta Gerwig, used humor to deliver her message by doing something simple—flipping the patriarchy on its head—making the man a shallow, objectified accessory—the perception of women since the beginning of time. But the result is hilarious. More importantly it makes you think.
Narrator: Barbie has a great day every day. But Ken only has a great day if Barbie looks at him.
Ken: I made a double bet with Ken. And you can't make me look uncool in front of Ken.
Seven Weeks of Sobriety*
The director and writer, Greta Gerwig, used humor to deliver her message by doing something simple—flipping the patriarchy on its head—making the man a shallow, objectified accessory—the perception of women since the beginning of time. But the result is hilarious. More importantly it makes you think.
I'm sure you've all seen it. And I'm recommending you take 2 hours over the holiday to watch it again. With your family. And then talk about your favorite parts. Or just take turns doing Karaoke to "I'm just Ken." Bonus points if you know the West Side Story slash Gap commercial dance sequence.
To celebrate Gheorghemas this year, I'm sharing 8 of my favorite quotes from the Barbie movie. Even if you haven't seen the Barbie movie yet (WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?), I know you've heard about America Ferrara's "It's impossible to be a woman" monologue, so that's not in here, but it's at the top of the list (obvi).
Barbie: Money is not speech, and corporations have no free speech rights to begin with. So, any claim on their part to be exercising a right is just their attempt to turn our democracy into a plutocracy. This makes me emotional. And I'm expressing it. I have no difficulty holding both logic and feeling at the same time. And it does not diminish my powers. It expands them.
- This is perfection. No notes.
- He’s just Ken.
Barbie: I've never seen this malfunction before. It's usually just hair related.
- Totally relatable. A bad hair day can make anyone malfunction.
Barbie: HE'S NOT COOL
Ken: He is to me.
Sasha: Okay Barbie. let's do this. You've been making women feel bad about themselves since you were invented.
- Be honest Gheorghies. You ABSOLUTELY had this exchange with your significant other at least once this year.
Barbie: I think you have that the wrong way around.
Sasha: You represent everything wrong with our culture: sexualized capitalism, unrealistic physical ideals. Barbie: You're describing something stereotypical. Barbie is so much more than that.
Sasha: Look at yourself. You set the feminist movement back 50 years. You destroyed girls innate sense of worth, you're killing the planet with your glorification of rampant consumerism.
Barbie: No, I'm supposed to help you and make you happy and powerful.
Ken: Why didn't Barbie tell me about patriarchy? Which, to my understanding, is where men and horses run everything. I shall seek my fortune there. I'll take a high-level, high-paying job with influence please. Random Finance Bro: Well, you need at least an MBA and a lot of our people have PhDs.
- This is a daily inner dialogue for most women.
Ken: Why didn't Barbie tell me about patriarchy? Which, to my understanding, is where men and horses run everything. I shall seek my fortune there. I'll take a high-level, high-paying job with influence please. Random Finance Bro: Well, you need at least an MBA and a lot of our people have PhDs.
Ken: Isn't being a man enough?
Bro: Actually right now, it's kind of the opposite.
Ken: You guys are clearly not doing patriarchy very well.
Bro: Ha, no...we're doing it well. We just hide it better now.
Barbie: She thinks I'm a fascist? I don't control the railways or the flow of commerce.
Barbie: I want to do the imagining, I don't want to be the idea.
- It’s both hilarious and depressing how accurate this exchange is.
- Nerd humor and I’m here for it.
- Don’t we all, Barbie. Don’t we all…
i watched barbie on friday in preparation for this edition of gheorghe: the film club. it's a no-holds-barred critique dressed up in pretty sets. shlara heard this story from me after i first read her draft: over thanksgiving we were talking with our kids about the tiktok trend of men detailing how often they think about the roman empire, and my youngest said, 'the patriarchy is my roman empire. i wake up every morning thinking about the patriarchy'. and she was dead serious. i may have her write a post.
ReplyDeleteI didn’t see Barbie in theaters. I had wanted to, but the missus saw it with her daughter when I couldn’t go, and there it went. Saw it Friday night when it first became streamable. It’s awesome. On the surface it’s highly amusing and a feast for the eyes, but like Mattel’s flagship product, it’s so much more than that. Clever and nuanced and worthy of a Gheorghemas post highlighting the best of a strong script. Great stuff, Shlara.
ReplyDeleteAnd I pretty much never think about the Roman Empire… unless something reminds me of a quote from Life of Brian.
ReplyDeletebusy day in the meatspace. eric montross died of cancer at 52. fuck cancer. pope francis cleared catholic priests to bless same-sex marriages. that seems like a big fucking deal. and the washington post reads g:tb (and you should read this well-reported and really interesting piece on the state and future of youth football in america): https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/interactive/2023/football-participation-decline-politics-demographics/?itid=hp-top-table-main_p001_f006
ReplyDeleteoh, and clarence thomas is a corrupt-ass motherfucker: https://www.propublica.org/article/clarence-thomas-money-complaints-sparked-resignation-fears-scotus
ReplyDeleteComing soon on the Gmas gift list: a masterclass on embedding links in comments for our tiny dictator.
ReplyDeleteAlso, according to the article. Justice Thomas bought himself a Corvette in the early 1990's, giving him distant commonality with TR's WCSAGD. Not sure there needs to be a What Car Does a Slimy Supreme Court Justice Drive segment, though.
ReplyDeletePlus, the '77 Vette is very different than that early 90's version. Assuming Pube Can bought it new.
Don't forget about Joe Biden's Vette!
ReplyDeleteThat Biden/Leno video should be a campaign commercial. You think Trump knows how to shift for himself?
ReplyDeleteI took zdaughter to see Barbie in the theater. She didn't love it, probably because the symbolism went over her head, and I didn't love it, probably because the symbolism was a little too heavy-handed for my taste (and I adore the patriarchy). We bond best over stuff that involve lightsabers and/or bounty hunters, wizards, and Spider-Man.
ReplyDeleteI went to dinner with fogtb J Swaney and his lady directly after seeing the Barbie movie over the summer. I was afraid I was going to get jammed for the entire meal.
ReplyDeleteswaney looks like a toughguy, but he’s as squishy-lib as they come. you were safe.
ReplyDeleteI was being a bit hyperbolic. He had already seen it.
ReplyDeleteWhoa. ODU goes up 28-0 in the first 2 mins of the 2nd quarter of their bowl game. Only to lose in overtime.
ReplyDeletethat's so odu
ReplyDeleteHey Rob, your Pop is buried at Arlington National and was career military, yes? Any idea what he might think or say about the Confederate memorial and current taffy pull about its removal?
ReplyDeleteon the one hand, he didn't have much patience for the sons of the old south. on the other, the thing he loved most in life was staking out positions designed to take the piss from the most people possible, so it's hard for me to guess.
ReplyDeleteanother very fine post. my wife and girls went to see barbie with a gaggle of others moms & daughters. i asked if i could come and was promptly denied (by my daughters).
ReplyDeleteand obx dave, i never did get to yours until well after the fact. at first glance in the blogger some weeks back while drafting my 12 days, i mistakenly referred to your post as whit's. apologies. your irish whiskey of choice, knappogue castle - that is not one i'm familiar with but trust that it is lovely. will be on the lookout for it, along w/my four roses, yellow.
the pablo torre finds out episode with smush parker is fannnnntastic
ReplyDelete