American Primitive

I got so excited about the release of my dog's book that I forgot the traditional G:TB celebration of the release of a new Old 97s record. American Primitive is the 13th studio album by our guys, who are marking their 30th year together as a band. That in itself is noteworthy.

Reviews have been nearly uniformly positive, lauding the band's consistency and hailing the record as "consistently exciting and rambunctious" while claiming its 13 tracks "cut a vigorous slice through some rowdy melodies & upbeat jaunty ones". Music, one might say, to my ears.

In a splendid bit of timing, I've now sold enough books to have generated sufficient royalties to purchase a vinyl version of the record. Gonna splash some of that writer cash.

Recurring Bit Recurs

It has become obligatory 'round these parts for me to celebrate new releases by the G:TB house band, Old 97's. Since we can't break with tradition, do enjoy the first single from the boys' 13th record, 'American Prime'. In addition to a reliably catchy tune (with a vocal production that seems new), the video that accompanies 'Where the Road Goes' is a fun little time capsule.

These Go to Twelve

They've finally gone and done it. With the release of Twelfth, the, um, 12th full-length album of their nearly 30-year career, Old 97s have managed to make my Dad happy. Or at least I assume he's happy, up there in heaven rocking out to a record that has this cover:

Dad was a big Cowboys fan, and he loved Roger Staubach. Same for 97's front man Rhett Miller, who grew up in Dallas idolizing the hall of fame quarterback. 

I think Dad would like the record, too. As a Paste review puts it, "The Old 97's sound like themselves on Twelfth - and that's a good thing."

Indeed, the album is familiar in all the right ways, like a perfectly worn pair of jeans, it's comfortable and cool. Rhett and the boys aren't breaking any new ground, but the terrain they're covering is the good shit. Here's a lyric from "Diamonds on Neptune": I got a room at a cheap hotel/I got a girl I don't know well/I got a feeling I'm gonna let her down. That sentiment is at home in every 97s record ever. I dig it.

Here's the whole record if you've got a lazy Sunday on tap and want something to keep you company.

Fulfilling Our Obligation

For those of you that haven't perused the G:TB By-Laws recently, allow me to refresh your memories. Section 9, paragraph 7 is unequivocal. When Old 97s release a new record, we're duty-bound to feature a track from it. And I'm not one to fuck with the By-Laws.

The new album is cleverly named Twelfth, as it is the band's 12th studio record. Whitney does not care much for the album cover.

Gheorghe's Milestones in Music

A recent survey conducted by the Clarence Institute of Finding Shit Out (CIFSO™) shed some light on some of the foundations of musical event attendance by the gheorghies through the years. Its intent was to allow GTB writers and readers alike to develop a contextual understanding of some of the posts and comments where rock and roll music is the topic. I dare say that we have learned a lot.

Note: if you consider yourself a gheorghie (a. get help, but b. . . .) and you were not surveyed, please do not take offense.  CIFSO standards and practices ensure a level of disorganization, gaps, scattershotness, haphazardry, outdated e-mail addresses, and erroneous data collection.  By our very design we incorporate a percentage error plus or minus 37.  It's what we do.

On to the findings.

We wanted to learn about concerts attended.  It's our belief at CIFSO that something as simple as the purchase of Snow's Twelve Inches of Snow is an egregious music error, but it's one easily made (sort of) and without much consequence.  (Like twelve bucks or so.)  It should not reflect too poorly on the purchaser nor render his opinion of Social Distortion's major label debut moot and meaningless.

Going to a show, though?  Well, mistakes can be made, but in our statistical expert opinion, it's a far more telling barometer of the quality of rock music taste.  Or lack thereof.  It says a lot about you if you have seen Billy Joel 27 times. Or moe.  Or Ned's Atomic Dustbin.  Or Garth Brooks.  Or the Weather Girls.  And the knowledge of whom you pay and/or travel to see rock it out helps serve our reading audience with background information.  Let's face it, reading Dave's well-crafted post from yesterday with the backstory that he either: (a) pays to see Jersey Shore cover bands meticulously cover old songs while he hates the original versions of those old songs, (b) was an indie pioneer and saw the Flaming Lips in a tiny room in college, or (c) got a hard rock band tattooed on his leg and then went to see them more than any other act . . . well, the more you know . . .

Anyway, that stuff plus the gheorghies' original foundations of seeing music once upon a time, as well as how far each concert-goer was willing to travel for a certain act all makes for good intel . . . for filtering out the bullcrap of some yahoo who broke their cherry on Warrant and made connecting flights to see Toby Keith.

Here we go.

The first question we asked of the GTBers was what their first concert was.  Who took your rock show virginity?  You always remember your first.  Unless you're Dave.

G:TB's First Concerts

TR: Whitesnake/Great White
Danimal: O.M.D. opening for Thompson Twins '85
Marls: Herman's Hermits/The Turtles
Squeaky: The Cars, Hampton Beach, NH
Zman: John Denver
Dave: either Sting (Dream of the Blue Turtles) or R.E.M. (Fables of the Reconstruction) with the Feelies, 1985
Mark: Warped Tour (Fishbone/Rancid headliners)
rob: Chicagoooo!!!
Shlara: The Jacksons (as in Michael and his brothers) Victory Tour at RFK
Whitney: The Monkees (w/ Herman’s Hermits); Grateful Dead a few months later.  Apparently I was born during WWII...
TJ: Steve Winwood, 1990, SPAC (Saratoga Performing Arts Center – great venue). Warren Zevon opened for Winwood. That is correct – Warren Zevon opened for Steve Winwood. Almost 30 years later I’m still baffled by this.
KQ: Go-Go's at Kings Dominion. BoDeans opened.
Mr. KQ: Peter Frampton
Clarence: Eddie and the Cruisers at Tony Mart’s, followed quickly by Stillwater

CIFSO can draw some interesting conclusions here, both individually and as a group.  But we won't. That's not what we do!  Instead we will let you do that in the comments.

We followed that question with this one: What's the furthest you ever traveled for a rock and roll show?

G:TB's Longest Road Trip for a Show

Zman: NY to Boston to see BRMC with Squeaky. NJ to Boston to see Jane's Addiction, Dinosaur Jr, and Living Colour with Squeaky but he didn't get the tickets so we saw a bluegrass band instead. So 225 to 250 miles.
Whitney: San Francisco for Outside Lands Music Festival ’14. Non-festival: Wilco in Brooklyn with Squeaky or the RnR HoF opener in '95 with Evan.
Squeaky: While living in VA saw a band at the Crocodile Club in Seattle. Can't remember the band but it was an offshoot of Mudhoney. And also 54-40 in Vancouver.
Mark: Smokin Grooves Tour - Cleveland, OH (Jurassic 5, The Roots, Outkast)

rob: Does JazzFest count? If not that, we saw King Sunny Ade at Millennium Park in Chicago last month.
Shlara: Foo Fighters in London
Danimal: U2 in Chicago
Marls: Don Ho in Honolulu
TR: Saw a Panic run at the Wiltern Theatre in LA in '01
TJ: OK, well, if you count Latham as my home, I guess it’s the Tribe Called Quest concert I saw at William and Mary. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever traveled to see a concert – I’ve always seen concerts in close proximity to where I was living at the time. [Ed. Note: Lame.]
KQ: That's probably Sister Hazel in Atlanta.

Mr. KQ: B-52’s, Orlando, FL circa 1981
Dave: Daytona! Primus/Salt 'n' Pepa/Ugly Kid Joe/Naughty By Nature [Ed. Note: a couple of other gheorghies were there as well, so this might be their actual pick]
Clarence: Spinal Tap, Cleveland / Detroit; Nick Rivers with special guest Autobahn in Germany; Infant Sorrow at the Greek

As CIFSO could have predicted (but didn't), answers ranged from inter-continental to barely across town. Interesting, mildly.

Finally, the crack engineers of this survey felt that its centerpiece had to be the band each of the group has seen most.  There are few truer gauges of your musical taste than the artists you have plunked down cash and gone to see the most.  One stray visit to a Dead show is one thing, but if you have seen 73 Phish concerts, we can assume more things about you.  Prejudices are created, like chances are you don't think of "Ringwald" when I say "Molly."  You get it.  This is like KGB.  Answer questions, please, comrade.

G:TB's Musical Acts Seen the Most in Concert

Okay, children, it's time for a game.  Match the gheorghie to their most-seen band!

The gheorghies:
(Ed. Note: The Gheorghies is a good name for a band . . . if it's not already taken)

Clarence – Danimal – Dave – KQ – Mark – Marls –Mr. KQ – rob – Shlara – Squeaky – TJ – TR – Whitney – Zman

The concerts (and how many times):

- U2 - 6 times 
- Aerosmith (3 times between 1994 and 1998) 
- Probably Pearl Jam, though Carbon Leaf and Sister Hazel are up there. (I could count but I was under the impression there would be no math.) 
- Drive-By Truckers (5 or 6 times and Jason Isbell twice). Allmans 4 or 5 times. 
- Widespread Panic (35-40x) 
- Either Old 97’s or They Might Be Giants. If you count Rhett solo shows, it's probably the former. (8ish) 
- Wilco (~17 times) 
- Has to be The Cult! (7?) 
- Either The Allman Bros or Springsteen (Sorry, 70’s and early 80s a bit of a blur) 4 or 5 each 
- The Roots (7-8 times) 
- Foo Fighters (like 8 or 9 times). Everyone else is only 4-5 times: U2, Grateful Dead, Bruce, Old 97's, Glen Hansard 
- Reverend Horton Heat (4 or 5 times) 
- Bob Mould (7 times) Widespread Panic, Echo and the Bunnymen, New Order (4 times)

- Either The Zack Attack or Wyld Stallyns, maybe 69 times each . . . although I spent a lot of time seeing Dr. Fünke’s 100 Percent Natural Good-Time Family Band Solution, much of which I don't remember thanks to the forget-me-nows

Make your picks at home and wait for the Answer Key to published in this space soon.  Good luck!

CIFSO's survey is complete.  Please do not find fault in the process. Because there is none.  Just learn about your co-bloggers, judge if you must, mock as a rule.  Enjoy.  (And go see more shows.)

Love,
Clarence

The 12 Days of Gheorghemas: Day 12

On the twelfth day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me...

 


Twelve Appreciations
Eleven Months of Awesome
Ten Reasons Being
Late Gifts Still Worth Giving
Eight Chapters on Music in a Post 
Seven Books For Reading (Seriously) 
Six Beers Worth Drinking 
A fiiiiifth Golden Ring..... (please?) 
Four Years of Marcus
Three Scummers Picking
Two albums to look forward to 
and 

A fat guy in a jersey 

It's that time of year again.  Yes, that special part of the calendar when you come to G:TB and ask, "It's still Gheorghemas??"

I'm drawing the curtains on another fine Gmas season, this time before Chinese New Year.  Cue the fireworks and dim sum.

As always, I intend to pair a dozen of the many things for which I am grateful with my favorite songs released in 2014.  Mainly I'm lucky to still be alive, employed, and with children at age 44, but as I was compiling this year's list of aspects of my life that make me particularly appreciative, I noticed something. They were the same things as I write every year. Friends, family, music, beach trips, Dale's Pale Ale, etc.  Kind of boring, even for me.

So here it is: I'm really very thankful for you clowns.  All of yous.  Don't let it go to your heads.

I listened to enough good new music this year that my end-of-year compilation stretched to two discs, the Upside faster stuff and the Downside mellow stuff.  Available upon request and via Spotify playlists below, but here's how I map them to my friends in the microblogosphere known as Gheorghe.  Come with me now and hear some of it.

Kongos, "Come With Me Now"


Marls
Cracker, "March of the Billionaires"

Dreamers, "Wolves"

Marls is a good egg.  He's a generous sort with whom I have had some fairly indulgent fun lately (Springsteen Row 1, Mets 15th row, Hamptons rollicking, New Orleans debauching).  Makes me feel like the billionaire I won't ever be, and I appreciate it.  Also, every 5th word out of Marls' Long Island mouth is the F-word, and the Dreamers song is blatantly NSFW.

Jerry
Modest Mouse, "Lampshades on Fire"

At the 2004 DC Santa Stumble, Jerry called me a music snob.  I protested and asked for evidence to support his claim. Without hesitation, he replied, "Okay, I bet you liked Modest Mouse way before they got popular."  I laughed really hard.  But dammit, their 1996 song "Talking Shit About a Pretty Sunset" is six minutes of slow-moving indie melody not to be missed. Jerry, thanks for always calling me on my bullshit in a way that makes me laugh.

By the way, "Lampshades on Fire" was released in December and may be my favorite of the year.

Zman
Drive-By Truckers, "Made Up English Oceans"
The Black Keys, "Fever"


Z, thanks for keeping me up to date on the bands I like and the shoes I don't.  Better reviews of music than in any publication people pay for, and a willingness to open your doors and couch and Tonka trucks and mustard for a great show.  Many thanks.


TR
alt-J, "Left Hand Free"
Painted Palms, "Spinning Signs"

The title of one of these and the band name of the other seem vaguely to be onanistic references.  For some reason, that makes me think of TR -- especially the mustachioed version.  TR, thanks for eagerly lampooning yourself for a good GTB laugh.  It underscores the premise of why we congregate here.

Mark
The New Basement Tapes, "Kansas City"
Tove Lo, "Habits (Stay High)"


Here's why I like Mark: usually you have two friends, one who has the storytelling skill, penchant for poignancy, and depth to share personal stories like the one about his dad playing soccer at Rockhurst University in Kansas City, another who breaks bad here and there and can serve as an audience so Clarence can relate bawdy tales of pale ales and large rails off medium bosoms.  Mark has broad enough shoulders to be both of those guys when he wants.  Quality.

Dave
Mike Doughty, "Light Will Keep Your Heart Beating in the Future"
Ray LaMontagne, "Supernova"

I am usually appreciative for the diverse array of Greasetruck music Dave, Mr. Truck, and the Almighty Yojo release. 2014 was a lean year for that.  But in his stead, I submit the Mike Doughty tune as the best banjo rock song since "The Bear" in 2009, and the Ray LaMontagne song as the best song to use that word since "Anna Kournikova Supernova" in the early aughts.  I thank Dave for serving as the foil of mine like no other for over 25 years.  May the Idiots record something in 2015.  Or release a dance remix.

Rootsminer
Hozier, "Take Me to Church"
Stereo Explosion, "Now or Forever"

Rootsy met me out in a Roanoke bar this year and had his drinkin' shoes firmly afoot. The night was blurry, but one thing is clear: I gotta get me back to the Star City for more fun with my little little little little brother -- and return to his recording studio which resembles a church music room.  2015, the year Clarence and I record a Duets album.  I need to do it now or forever hold my piece. Stay tuned. Cheers, Rootsy.

Dennis
Future Islands, "Seasons (BADBADNOTGOOD Remix)"

While this version of the song sounds très Zman, the chorus is all Dennis, as we await his return from an anarcho-syndicalist commune.

Danimal
Sharon Van Etten, "Taking Chances"
Milky Chance, "Stolen Dance"

Though several dabble, Danimal seems to be the resident bookmaker at G:TB. Perhaps his old pal Jean Pierre factors into that. But thank you, Danny Boy, for showing me how someone very much in the know can get consistently burned by the outcome of games so I don't add this vice to an already long list.  (He's also the resident bartender.  Those recommendations I dive into willingly.)

Mr. KQ
St. Paul and the Broken Bones, "Call Me"

"Core principles" is a term coined a decade or so ago by a wise person among our circle of friends to describe the notion that if you happen upon one of our gang's hometowns, you call them up and go have a beer.  While newer to our group, Señor KQ seems to have mastered core principles since well before we were even born.  And although his favorite activities include crouching, touching, and engaging, we will still take his calls and drink his booze every time out.

Greg
Death from Above 1979, "Trainwreck 1979"

Greg's about the youngest among us. If he was born in 1979, this song title is perfect.  Either way, it's good rock.  And Greg is, too.

Mayhugh
Cheap Girls, "Knock Me Over"

I don't know anybody in my town who's a boxing fan.  If the sport is ever mentioned, everyone bemoans its deep decline and irrelevance in the modern sporting world.  I'm able to contribute some counter-evidence in the argument thanks to Mayhugh (and Mark) as the champion of a not dead yet sport.

Squeaky
Catfish and the Bottlemen, "Kathleen"
Interpol, "All the Rage Back Home"

The Squeaker keeps me up to speed on new music.  Catfish and the Bottlemen is a little known Welsh alt-rock band, just the type of thing Squeaky would unearth for me.  And if he'd sent it my way, Squeaker would be sure to note that the song is all the rage back where they're from.  Keep 'em coming, little buddy.


Gheorghe's Ladies
Ingrid Michaelson, "Girls Chase Boys"
Jenny Lewis, "Just One of the Guys"
Meg Myers, "Desire"
Alvvays, "Archie, Marry Me"

Ladies love cool James.  Whitney loves cool ladies.  We have more than a few of them in our midst, which we would have figured impossible when we were in college.  They lend credibility and context to our boys' locker room, even as we (really I) bug Shlara with dick jokes and dipshittery.  God bless you, fair ladies, and here's to the lot of you.  The hole really is greater than the sum of your lady parts.

Geoff
Sun Kil Moon, "Ben's My Friend"

Ben "Boots" Brubeck is his friend.  And we all remember the Boots blogpost.

TJ
First Aid Kit, "Silver Lining"

Lykke Li, "No Rest for the Wicked"

Beck, "Blue Moon"

Not one but two Swedish indie pop acts make the 2014 list.  Pretty rare.  As were Teej blog appearances in 2014.  He checks in only once in a blue moon, but (a) he's earned a reprieve after shouldering the load (ngs) for the early era of Gheorghe, and (b) we appreciate him getting schooled now so he can get a cushy job that will allow him to blog at will.

Rob
Old 97's, "Longer Than You've Been Alive"
Counting Crows, "Scarecrow"
J. Mascis, "Every Morning"

Plenty to thank Rob for, as has been the case since 1988.  Performing more heavy lifting 'round these parts than any of us -- truly one of the best bloggers ever, pound for pound.  His core principles are in the 95th percentile, and he keeps Clarence humble while absorbing every last stupid, trite short joke. Not bad for a wee one.  Just as deep down "Cheers" was really about Norm Peterson, as evidenced by the theme song and the fact that he was the only character to appear in every episode, this place is mostly about Rob. With some Teej, Dave, and other goofy characters thrown in for comedic effect.  And we like it that way.  Every morning I check gheorghe77.blogspot.com to see if Rob's posted, and more often than not he has answered the bell.  Cheers, my friend.

Clarence
Sleater-Kinney, "Bury Our Friends"

I am grateful for having Clarence on the blog, if only because he says the things I really shouldn't.  Here's hoping he sticks around and we don't have to bury this friend like we have had to bury too many already, including one whose Gheorghie self-proclamations were appended by multiple exclamation points. 

Miscellaneous
Strand of Oaks, "Goshen '97"
Cold War Kids, "All This Could Be Yours"
Aer, "Says She Loves Me"
Ex-Cops, "Black Soap"
The Asteroids Galaxy Tour, "My Club"



Gheorghe Muresan
Aloe Blacc, "The Man"

Of course.  And we are doing this in 2015.  (The second item on the menu.)







Say goodbye to Gheorghemas.  Say goodbye, my baby.

I Procastinate Even While I'm Procrastinating

Still working on my top 10(ish) songs opus, but it's turning into a serious project. I might release it in chapters.

Until then, in celebration of the 20th anniversary of the Old 97's (a band that will certainly factor into my list) debut album, Hitchhike to Rhome, a pair of versions of my favorite tune from that album.

First, the original studio recording, which has since morphed from a bluegrass head-nodder into a straight-ahead rocker:



And, for Shlara and KQ, a sweaty Rhett version that rocks, though the sound quality is brutal:

Resurrection (May Contain Blasphemy)

It's been a cow's age since I anticipated a new record as much as I do this month's Old 97's release. Twenty years since the band's first album, Most Messed Up is being hyped as a return to its roots, a rollicking, raunchy mess. I mean that in the most positive way possible.

Various reviewers have described the record as "a boozy, blurry whirl", "balls-out, country-fried rock", and "blistered, blasted, and brilliant". After a run of releases that were perfectly good, hook-heavy pop offerings, the work of a rock quartet maturing in and out of the studio, the band's long-time fans are thrilled by the notion that the 97's may be returning to Too Far to Care's barely-on-the-tracks vibe.

The record comes out on April 29. It's the first one I've ever pre-ordered, so I get my first listen next Friday. Until then, here's 97's frontman Rhett Miller with a solo version of the title track. It's most definitely NSFW or for children's ears.