NME Magazine's Top 100 Albums of the Decade

Lists. They're objective, tough to categorize and create instant debate fodder. And it seems that the point of many of them is to push a controversial agenda and bring it into some sort of public forum. As I (struggle to) mature, I've found that it's usually best to ignore lists I stumble across on the world wide web, as there is usually an ulterior motive for controversial selections. But sometimes, when I fall victim to whimsy and read through a list, I uncover mistakes of such an egregious nature occur that it forces me to fend off ennui, pull out my soapbox, double-check the planks to make sure they won't break when my fat ass climbs up, and vent.

The issue is this: NME Magazine's Top 100 albums of the decade. NME Magazine is a publication that caters to folks on the other side of the pond who like their rock and roll. For the most part, the list is okay, with some well-known monster releases combined with a healthy dose of the indie stuff that music insiders love to know better than suburban Dads.

But's what's the #1 album of the decade, according to these pundits? None other than this shit sandwich.

I have nothing against one-hit wonders who liberally steal from Tom Petty's American Girl when crafting their singles, but I sure wouldn't put them at the top of any list (unless it was a list of d-bags who get hot chicks). Actually, I take that last sentence back. The first part, at least. I do have something against them. The band was fast-tracked to fame because Julian Casablancas' dad was the founder of the Elite Modeling Agency and instantly constructed a sexy following for the guys in the band that sported terrible faux fros and outfits that would make Journey wince. Their music is incredibly unoriginal and unexciting, and these guys are not worthy of holding Jack White's red and white jock strap. Assuming he wears one at all. And that if he did, it would match his band's color scheme.


The Strokes may have spawned the godforesaken hipster movement, but they are certainly not worthy of such adulation, especially if they're not paying Tom Petty and each and every Heartbreaker for stealing the chorus of American Girl for use in Last Night.


On that festive note, happy Thanksgiving.