A Quick Hot Take on COVID Vaccine Passports

Some people don't like the idea of COVID vaccine passports because it somehow infringes on liberty or human rights or something like that.  This includes Ron DeSantis, the governor of Florida and an alumnus of Yale and Harvard Law School and a former JAG Corps officer at Guantanamo Bay (which is to say a smart guy who knows a thing or two about liberty and human rights).

I think this position is wildly overblown.

If you want to attend public schools you have to show proof of vaccination.  Yes, you can obtain a waiver in many states for religious or philosophical reasons, but either way your local school district knows whether your kids have or haven't been vaccinated for various things.

Many other countries require visitors to get vaccinated for Yellow Fever before they can enter.  So, for example, if you want to visit Angola or Benin you have to show proof of vaccination.  To make this easier, WHO even has an international certificate of vaccination or prophylaxis, or ICVP, to carry with you to these places.  A vaccine passport, if you will.  So when you go to these places their governments know you've been vaccinated for various things.

If you want to leave the US and go to another country, you need ... a passport!  I have one and you probably do too.  Getting it required a bunch of paperwork, a photo, a fee, and an inordinately long wait but now I can leave the country and get back in.  As a result, the government knows a bunch of things about me and so do the governments of the foreign places I visit.  That's just the cost of travel.

Sharing information about yourself with your government is the cost of citizenship.  We share health information all the time (see my school example above; see also anyone over 65 who uses Medicare).  This circumstance shouldn't be any different.

At the end of the day which is worse: a bunch of bureaucrats knowing that you got the COVID shot, or dealing with more masking/distancing/shutdown precautions?  So lighten up Ron.

Don't Sue Your Customers, Alternatively Titled "Jeffrey Loria is the Least Gheorghe Man Alive This Week"

Law school provides almost zero practical knowledge. I gleaned the most useful nugget, in terms of real-world utility, in my trademarks course: Don't sue your customers. If you sue your customers they won't like you, and if they don't like you they won't be your customers anymore, in which case you'll have no sales and you'll go out of business.

My favorite example of this rule in application is the drug store. Go into any big chain pharmacy and you'll see stuff like this:

On the left are Gillette Venus Tropical ladies' razors. On the right are CVS ladies' razors. Both razors are pink and feature tropical packaging. Gillette, of course, came up with this marketing angle first and CVS knocked it off. They did the same to Schick:

Why do Gillette and Schick tolerate this blatant trade dress infringement? Because CVS buys shitloads of their razors, and if they antagonize CVS then they won't sell as many shitloads of their razors. Here's another egregious example:

Things get pretty brazen in the OTC pharmaceutical space. Not only are the CVS generic products presented in almost identical packaging to the branded product, the CVS boxes say stuff like "Compare to the active ingredient in Prilosec OTC" or "Compare to the active ingredients in Vicks DayQuil."

Not even vaporizers are immune from these shenanigans. Check out this bootleg device:

Why does Procter & Gamble let this slide? Because just about everything P&G makes is purchased at pharmacies, and CVS is a really really big pharmacy chain. If P&G isn't down with CVS then someone else will put their heartburn pills and daytime cold dranks and cheap humidifiers on CVS's shelves.

Remarkably, Jeffrey Loria and the rest of the Miami Marlins ownership group don't seem to understand this basic business principle. I say this because, as rob noted previously, the Marlins sued season ticket holders who backed out of their ticket packages. Some backed out because, at least in part, the Marlins stopped giving them special amenities like private entrances and pole-position parking, amenities that were not included in the season ticket contract but that were promised during the verbal sales pitch.

Now I understand that a contract means what it says, that people put things in writing because they intend for both parties to live up to their promises, and that there have to be repercussions when people breach. So I get why the Marlins want to be made whole when a corporation bails on a luxury box. That said, what type of donkey-brained moron goes after individuals who buy two-seat packages? Especially when the team starts pulling back promised perks in order to save money. Not even Dan Snyder would be so stupid as to ... oh wait ... scratch that. Well, at least Snyder dropped the suit.

This is a remarkably short-sighted move by the Marlins. Fifty inch smart HD TVs cost less than $750 and they can be used to stream any live baseball game being played anywhere in the world. No one has to leave the comfort of their home to watch a game. There are also other things to do in Miami beyond watching baseball, like watching the Panthers/Dolphins/Heat, or actually playing sports in the year-round awesome weather, or boating/surfing/swimming/fishing in the ocean, or enjoying Miami's fantastic night life, or doing other things that you can do anywhere like read a book, go to the movies, Netflix and chill, etc. Why the hell should anyone give tens of thousands of dollars to some wealthy jackass who might very well sue you if you lose your job and don't have the disposable income to pay for baseball tickets?

So screw you Jeffrey Loria. You are the least Gheorghe man alive this week.

Then He Started Throwing Sea Creatures

Somebody needs to get Mark's relatives under control...

MADEIRA BEACH — A 41-year-old man who witnesses said had been drinking since 9 a.m. was arrested Monday afternoon after authorities say he created a disturbance by pretending to drown and throw jellyfish on teenagers.

Keith Edward Marriott, of 100 154th Ave. in Madeira Beach, faces charges of disorderly intoxication and carrying a concealed weapon after a pocketknife was found in his shorts, Pinellas County sheriff's deputies said. Marriott repeatedly submerged himself and floated to the surface, "causing concern for his safety," and was "loud and disruptive," according to a sheriff's report.

Then he started throwing sea creatures.

Marriott, who is listed on arrest reports as working for a brokerage company, was being held at Pinellas County Jail in lieu of $250 bail.