The Worst Person In the World

Last Wednesday, our own tiny dictator reached out to the twitterverse to inquire about the following:

1. Feb 13@batogato ‏@batogato

   is there a worse person in the world than the guy who farts on a crowded train?

This was no doubt related to his own gastrointestinal reaction to several days of dining on work conference food, Big Gay Ice Cream, & multiple Dogfish 90 Minute Imperial IPA's on the train from New York to Washington DC. 

At the time, I was tempted to give Rob some solace by advising him to "let em' rip" because the guy who farts on a plane is much worse than the railway cheese cutter.  At least on Amtrak if you are overwhelmed by your co-passenger's flatulence you can get up and move to another car, maybe even settle into one of those comfy molded plastic seats in the cafe car - which is almost like being in a Parisian cafe, but without the smoking, haughty service, and any ambiance at all.

Anyway, after reading today's NY Daily News, I realize that I was mistaken.   Apparently, scientists are now advocating breaking wind at altitude.  Research published in the New Zealand Medical Journal states that while flying, 

"(Holding back) holds significant drawbacks for the individual, such as discomfort and even pain, bloating, dyspepsia (indigestion), pyrosis (heartburn) just to name but a few resulting abdominal symptoms."

To me, these sound like the normal symptoms of holding in farts, but who am I to argue with science?

Interestingly, the study also claims that women's farts smell worse than men's.  This finding is vehemently denied by my wife.  However, that may be due to the particular odoriferous emanations of the Marls' household.  

Finally, for those of you unaware of the pleasures of the D90MIIPA, I have included a video review, which also might be a first ballot inductee into the Stoned YouTubeing HOF. (To be fair, they may just be shitfaced)

Gheorghe-pourri Lives

It's baaaaaaaack..."Gheorghe-pourri", the excuse for me to clean up the G:TB editorial drafts. Let's jump right in:

rob:

"untitled"

Something about Pussy Riot and Vladimir Putin's fear thereof

"untitled"

Flat-D Flatulence Deoderizer | ColonialMedical.com http://www.colonialmedical.com/flat-d-flatulence-deoderizer-P-1004.html

Some breaking news from TR, unless he has talked himself down off the ledge:

"Declaring for Fandom Free Agency.  Coming to Terms with My Broken (Sports) Marriage."

It is with a heavy hear that I am officially announcing my break-up from the New York Knicks.  It has been a wonderful ~30 years, but I feel that our relationship is now irrevocably broken, and I must move on.  I would like to thank the 1980's players such as Bernard King, Gerald Wilkins, Marc Jackson and Patrick Ewing who led me to the team, and the warriors who gave this team an image in the early/mid 1990's, including Charles Oakley, John Starks, Pat Rileyand even Xavier McDaniel.  I would also like to thank the players who kept the fire alive in the post-Riley era, which featured ugly (though highly competitive) basketball, notably Larry Johnson, Marcus Camby and Allan Houston.

I have very little to say about this franchise over the last twelve years.  It has been a consistent churn of mid-level talent that bore the stamp of mediocrity imprinted on it by Isiah Thomas.  The team challenged my heart over and over again, and has finally broken it.  I feel nothing for these guys.  A younger, idealistic version of me might still idolize the team and its superstars, but the adult me, with finite free time and finite discretionary income, has decided to take my talents elsewhere.

The constant in the narrative of failure this millenium has been owner Jim Dolan.  I pin the blame for the failure of this marriage squarely on his tubby shoulders.  He has run this franchise like the frenetic spoiled brat he remains in his mid 50's.
s.


I'm pretty sure Rich Danko, Levon Helm and Robbie Robertson are all rolling in their grave over this sacrilege. And Robbie Robertson ain't even dead yet. 

zman wheeling out his hype machine for notoriously humble Kanye West:

"Mighty Healthy G.O.O.D. Music"

Kanye West continues to dominate, this time by borrowing the drum line and a line or two from "Mighty Healthy," one of my favorite Ghostface songs.

There are actually quite a few more items in drafts that need to be cleaned up, but these should suffice for now. Carry on.