WFCSAGS: How Are They Doing?

Over the years, we've blessed/cursed the assembled Gheorhiage with rooting interests in various (mostly) English (mostly) Premier League teams. A number in our number brought their own allegiances to the table. But as far as I can tell, we've never really done any sort of retrospective/where are they now post about our squadrons' respective fates. Until now, that is.

I really could've chosen a scientific method for choosing the order in which we'd attack this challenge, but I'm kinda selfish, and I'm gonna start with me and my mediocre side. Fulham currently sit in 13th in the EPL on 39 points, nine more than their closest pursuer, and 14 points above the relegation zone. The Whites are safe (ain't that true) after a season where loftier goals briefly flashed. On balance, though, success.

Shlara's (and Prince William's) Aston Villa have been far sportier under the brilliant Unai Emery. With six matches to play, the Villans are deadlocked with Squeaky and Rootsy's Tottenham Hotspur on 60 points. Spurs have a game in hand and a slightly better goal difference. The top four teams in the EPL automatically qualify for Champions League play, so the fight for fourth is consequential. Unless England top Germany and Italy for a fifth slot in the newly-configured UEFA rules, in which case...fuck, man, that's complicated. Both of these teams are good, and they'll play in some European competition next year. Let's leave it at that. Except to note that Villa is alive in the quarterfinals of the UEFA Conference League, the third-tier continental competition, which...fuck, man...that's complicated.

Danimal's Manchester City have a far simpler path, at least domestically. They're in the midst of a three-way (get your simple minds out of the gutter) battle for supremacy in England. With seven matches to play, Arsenal and Liverpool are tied on 71 points, with City a slim point behind. Pep Guardiola's Blues are still alive in Champions League and FA Cup action, fighting on three fronts. Since they're arguably the best club side in the world, it'd be hard to bet against them in any of those competitions.

Marls and Dave pull for a pair of squads with different aspirations but similar disappointment. Newcastle United flew a bit too close to the sun in their first flirtation with the elites as their newest incarnation, flaming out of the Champions League and sliding back to 8th in the Premier League amidst a rash of injuries that even Saudi money couldn't overcome. Dave's Brentford buzzed around mostly impotently, alighting on 15th place in the Premier League, with a bit of work yet to do before they can start planning for another season in the top flight.

Leicester City came out of the gate a house a'fire, shrugging off the shock of relegation by making a statement about the impermanence of their fate. Whit's Foxes (one of the worst Charlie's Angels knockoffs we can recall) won 13 of their first 14 English League Championship matches, setting a sporty pace for the rest of the division. Since mid-February, however, they've won three, drawn one, and lost six. They're tied with Ipswich Town on 88 points at the top of the table, with Leeds United one point back and four matches remaining. The top two teams earn automatic promotion to the Premier League, while the third-place team fights it out in a four-team tournament for the final spot at the top. White knuckle ride for Leicester Nation.

Zman and his Canaries have been out of the spotlight for a while, but they've got a puncher's chance of changing that, thanks in no small part to Josh Sargent, American Ginger. Norwich City are in sixth place in the Championship with a five-point cushion over seventh-place Coventry City, and in line for a spot in the the four-way cage match for the final promotion spot. Sargent's battled back from injury to record 15 goals in just 22 games, good for fifth in the league despite playing 14 fewer matches than anyone above him in the scoring table. If he keeps it up, we could see him lead the line for the Yanks in 2026.

Finally, we get to our man Teej, who manages to hold two different allegiances in his capacious heart. His Michael Bolton Wanderers are at risk of surprising us all and jumping up to the Championship. Bolton are currently in third place, two points behind Derby County, but holding a game in hand over the Rams with three to play. It's happening, says us.  

Meanwhile, the Teej's Forward Madison are off to a strong start here stateside, unbeaten through three USL League One matches, and still unbeaten in terms of their kit design.

We'll close with bonus content for the many who've embraced a lower-level team from Wales as their side piece. If you were to write a script, the three-season arc that's seen Wrexham fail to earn promotion from the National League, then rise to League Two and find itself on the verge of a consecutive promotion to League One would be met with raised eyebrows. If you added Deadpool and Rob McElhenney, you'd be charged with crimes against Hollywood. And yet, here we are. Wrexham sit second on the English League Two table, needing only five points in their final three matches to secure their place in League One. The documentary just keeps getting better.