Better Know Your Minor League Mascot

Alabama, long reliably one of the more ass-backward states in our fair union, is having a bit of a moment. (I mean, we'll not reference educational scores, teacher pay, per-capita income - just go with the bit, man.) The Crimson Tide reign supreme as the undisputed apex predator in the jungle of semi-professional American football. Semi, in this case meaning that the coaches and administrators are professional, at least. And the state did manage to send Doug Jones to the Senate, if only because the GOP nominated a literal crazy pedophile to oppose him.

This week, the Heart of Dixie added another tally to the good side of the ledger, minor league mascot category.

The Mobile BayBears of the Double-A Southern League are moving to Madison, AL for the 2020 season. Madison is a suburb of Huntsville, known as a technology center, and the place where the U.S. space program was born. (Lesser known, but not less importantly, as my home from 1978 to 1983.) In a contest to choose the name of the new team, the people of Northern Alabama chose a name that's crying out for the BKYMLM treatment.

Name: Rocket City Trash Pandas
League: Southern (AA)
Affiliation: Los Angeles Angels
Logo: TBD

Self-Absorbed East Coast Elitist Commentary:

The term 'trash panda' as a nickname for the common raccoon is a new invention, first finding life on Reddit in early 2014. Pretty meteoric rise for the fitting moniker for that craft scavenger. I love it on principle, as it's all kinds of whimsical and silly, and while raccoons can be found across the United States, they're identified with a certain strain of redneck usually found in the South.

I've got a bit of a quibble, though, about the nickname in this context. Huntsville is actually a pretty cosmopolitan city, at least by the standards of the deep South. It's got a burgeoning tech economy, a major Army base, the aforementioned space program, and a highly educated workforce. Trash Pandas feels a little like the town is trying too hard to convince its neighbors that it actually hasn't put on airs.

In the end, though, we'll allow it. Whimsy always wins. And given that the alternatives were Space Chimps, Moon Possums, ThunderSharks, and Comet Jockeys, Madison dodged a bullet.

Gheorgheness Quotient: 63/77