Guess Who's Back. Footy's Back.

It's that time of year again. On the first day of the 2018-19 English Premier League season, our man Fat Guy in a Speedo has issued forth his preview of...hang on.

One minute. Sorry.

I'm being told that Fat Guy's preview got lost in the mail. We don't have anything for you.

The blogshow must go on, however, and Manchester United does host Leicester at 3:00 Eastern in the season's lidlifter, so herewith a couple of odds and ends as the league kicks off.

The consensus opinion says that Manchester City, coming off a season that saw them set records for most points, most goals, and largest margin between first and second place, remains the class of the league. It's hard to argue with that consensus. Pep Guardiola's squad added classy wing Riyad Marhez from Leicester and didn't lose anyone of note.

"I'm very pleased with myself"

That same consensus agrees that Liverpool significantly improved during the summer transfer window, and is the odds-on favorite to come second. Jurgen Klopp's team got much better in the net by grabbing Roma's Allison, added a terrific defensive midfield presence in Naby Keita, picked up midfielder/right back Fabinho from Monaco, and snagged mini-mite Zherdan Shaquiri from relegated Stoke City to back up Mo Salah. Liverpool will be the most fun team in the league to watch.

After that top two, it's a consensus mishmash. Most everyone believes that the top six consist of the aforementioned two clubs and Tottenham Hotspur, Manchester United, Chelsea, and Arsenal. For my money, both West Ham and Everton, who went on spending sprees, have a puncher's chance of topping at least one of those four.

Spurs fans are apoplectic that their team was literally dormant during the transfer period, adding not a single player despite the fact that they're opening a brand new stadium. I'm going contrarian. Spurs return a very solid squad, with nine of their roster playing in the quarterfinals and beyond of the World Cup in Russia. That might mean they'll start slow, but they'll finish in the top four when it's all over.

"My management, they are shit"

Manchester United fans are also up in arms, and they've got more reason. Jose Mourinho has been pouting all summer about his management's relative inaction, and his black mood won't get any better as his team scuffles all year.

Gheorghe says the top four looks like: Manchester City, Liverpool, Tottenham, and Chelsea.

Meanwhile, in the great middling mess of a relegation battle that'll likely span at least ten teams, my Fulham side just broke a league record by spending £128m on transfers, the most ever by a newly-promoted club. Shahid Khan's son Tony went for it, landing 12 new players and all but assuring the Cottagers will stay up.

Wolverhampton Wanderers, another promoted side, also did significant business this summer, and look poised to join Fulham in the solid middle of the table.

The bottom three, according to Gheorghe, are: Huddersfield Town, Cardiff City, and Southampton.

And as soon as we find Fat Guy, we'll give you an actual preview.