On the fifth day of Gheorghe-mas, Big Gheorghe gave to me...
Five Golden Rings
Four-gone Conclusions
Three Saluki Tallies
Two Recurring Features
And a Doofus Dancing (hee, hee)
Four-gone Conclusions
Three Saluki Tallies
Two Recurring Features
And a Doofus Dancing (hee, hee)
Resident college football and pitbull expert Mark finally took the plunge this year and won his lady's hand in marriage. What he didn't tell her is that the wedding will also serve as the venue for G:TB Summit 2010. I can't wait. Sure, it's my first G:TB Summit. But this isn't your standard fairy tale wedding. It's Mark's wedding. And I'm 99.69% positive it's gonna be like this:
Spaceships don't come equipped with rearview mirrors. Truer words have never been said.
Congrats Mark.
That's probably pretty close. I'm just trying to figure out which rappers from the beginning of the video equate to which G:TB staff members...
ReplyDeleteIn theory I'd like to be Pimp C but he's dead, so maybe T-Pain. TJ is clearly Fonzworth Bentley.
ReplyDeleteWocka Wocka
ReplyDeleteFonzworth Bently sounds like a name that would come out of a name generator. Take a shortened name/nickname, add a WASP-ish ending for the first name and then use a luxury product for the last name.
ReplyDeleteTeejworth Cristal
Z-Manerford Escalade
Whitchester Benz
Rezington Courvoisier
Tootenbothem Massengill?
ReplyDeleteThat would be S. Page Toothenbothem VAgicil.
ReplyDeleteNice job by you Marlin. Nice job by you.
ReplyDeleteI prefer Whitfield Perignon.
ReplyDeleteAnd don't forget my friend Squirrelham Armani.
Markwith P. Remington?
ReplyDeleteI like Markwood Gulfstream.
ReplyDeleteYep, that works. Marlin's good at this.
ReplyDeleteDavely Lipton Tea-Bag
ReplyDeleteWhitford Bleucheese
ReplyDeleteZoltington Prada
I wish someone would have told me about this method before I named my children!
G. Grantland Burberry...almost works too well. Maybe Dinglebury would be better.
ReplyDeleteD.C. Geofferson Blackberry.
ReplyDeleteTimmeford Rez Van Heusen.
ReplyDeleteFine name. Fine brand of affordable dress clothes for.
Robforth Russington Heuer
ReplyDeleterobhinho calphalon
ReplyDeleteWhitbread Huyghe
ReplyDeleteDanson A. Piguet
ReplyDeletesquirrelington van de camp
ReplyDeleteZoltart van DeLay. I'm in the import/export business.
ReplyDeleteDick Rambone.
ReplyDeleteWhat are the rules for this game?
Lackey taking a physical with the Red Stockings. Early Boxing Day present for Squirrelham Armani?
ReplyDeleteChase Blackburn?
ReplyDeleteOh wait...
How can you include Chase Blackburn but leave out Madison Hedgecock?
ReplyDeletefor those interested in conference administrative geekery, check out mgl today for a look at caa commissioner tom yeager's not-so-veiled threat to move the conference hoops tournament out of the dismal richmond coliseum. only good thing about it is the relatively central location for team gtb. the facility is among the dumpiest dumps in its class.
ReplyDeleteCAA in MSG?
ReplyDeletei'd settle for verizon center, but msg would be fun
ReplyDeleteWe like Peeps:
ReplyDeletehttp://bit.ly/5rerNp
TJ's Dick Rambone comment completely laid the comedy rhombus to waste. i hope you're proud of yourself Doofus.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'd sure be mad at me too...if it wasn't TR who made that comment. He needs to go back to Rhymenocerous.
ReplyDeleteWell, he couldn't spell Rhymenocerous so that was problematic.
ReplyDeleteLegregford Nautica
ReplyDeleterhymewood callaway
ReplyDeleteAP Top 25 has W&M getting one vote, putting them in a tie with the mighty Army Cadets for 54th place. ESPN/USA Today poll has us in a 5-way tie for 40th place.
ReplyDeleteWe're behind Wake in both polls. Bullschtein.
Greg...we're not doing black names.
ReplyDeleteApparently, we are an internet resource for people who want to fuck a shoe...
ReplyDelete"how to fuck a shoe"
Markport Stetson.
ReplyDeleteWait, that sounds like some kind of gay cowboy...
ReplyDeleteI say...fuck shoes.
ReplyDeleterhymo, we had two votes last week. who the fuck dropped us because we didn't play? i want names. i want answers!
ReplyDeleterhymington toblerone
ReplyDeleteThurston Justice Magli
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your fury, Rob. May I suggest you send a vile piece of hate mail to Austin Meek at the Topeka Capital Journal?
ReplyDeleteI dug that name off the interweb and I have no idea if he even has a vote, but you should start with him. F Topeka.
Sir Reptitious?
ReplyDeleteespn says halladay to the phils, cliff lee to the mariners in a three-way trade.
ReplyDeleteUm, and the Mariners give up who exactly in this menage?
ReplyDeleteyes, well, our good friends in bristol couldn't be bothered to include that trifling detail. stand by.
ReplyDeleteWhat exactly are the Mariners trying to do? Are they actually interested in winning or are they just going to grab 2-3 "name" guys every 5 years just to keep their fans from completely giving up (which also ends up screwing up the team's payroll and keeps them mired in mediocrity)?
ReplyDeletetoronto gets..."prospects".
ReplyDeleteand mark, lee's a relatively young (31), relatively cost-controlled stud (due to make $8m in 2010).
chone figgins, on the other hand.
Speaking of three-ways, any good Tiger news today?
ReplyDeleteI'm not of the opinion that 31 is as young as we thought it was (baseball wise) now that we're not smack dab in the middle of the steroid era, but point taken.
ReplyDeleteLee also feels like a guy who'll be trade bait by July again, through little fault of his own.
Marco Scutaro, Boof Bonser, AND John Lackey!?! Heckuvan off-season performance by Theo. And by "heckuvan," I'm referring to Teaneck High School football coach Dennis Heck, the Jamarcus Russell of NNJIL Pacific football coaches.
ReplyDeleteno new mistress' have come forth today - that's pretty good news for tiger. you gotta start somewhere.
ReplyDeletei still think he's clean. he didn't have affairs with any of these women.
the nnjil has a 'pacific' division? that's jamarcusian geographical awareness.
ReplyDeleteThe NNJIL apparently realigned since I graduated from high school, but it had Pacific division when I was a lad. Which perhaps explains my complete and total lack of geographical awareness. I'm atrociously and inexcusably inept at geography.
ReplyDeletewas the other half of the nnjil known as the 'warlike' division? that may explain it.
ReplyDeleteIt was, predictably, the NNJIL Atlantic division.
ReplyDeleteThe NNJIL Smythe division was the best, none of that boring defensive crap they played in the Norris division.
ReplyDeleteWe don't get much (if any) fog where I live. Today, however, has been decidely different. A heavy fog rolled in off the ocean at about 4 pm. By the time I left work, I couldn't see the water underneath me as I drove over the bridge to my home. It's now far worse. I'm talking Eagles-Bears Playoff game level bad here. Streetlights are useless. Most people are driving with their brights on (well done, Florida Drovers). I can't even see the house that's two doors down from me on either side.
ReplyDeleteCan somebody tell me what the fuck is going on? I feel like I'm in an M. Night Shamylan movie.
my anger at the pollsters may have been misplaced. the tribe got 9 votes in the espn/usa today poll, which may have been the one i saw last week. i owe that dude in topeka an apology.
ReplyDeletebut the tribe got 9 freaking votes in the espn/usa today poll. you'll forgive my lack of equilibrium.
(Tiger's) Lady in the Water?
ReplyDeleteDon't you dare apologize to anyone in Topeka. That guy had it coming, I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteKurt Warner channeling Jay Cutler tonight.
ReplyDeleteAnd that new Arnold Palmer SportsCenter ad is fantastic.
NINE VOTES!
ReplyDeleteThis is so exciting...
Mark, untowel and open the door...the fog will dissipate.
ReplyDelete