Au Revoir, Shithead

2014, in so many ways, wasn't our finest hour as a nation, or really, as a species. It was marked by venality, stupidity, ill-humor, selfishness, tragedy, and divisiveness. And that was just the Lakers. We struggled with racism, economic issues, a politics where noise and distraction overwhelmed right and wrong, true evil disguised as misdirected religious fervor, disease, and Roger Goodell.

Now, more than ever, the world needs Gheorghe. This is our year, boys and girls. When we fly the banner of dipshittery proudly, and set an example for our fellow man. When we buy matching G:TB onesies and wear them as a group. When the Tribe finally kicks Lucy's football. Or something. When Brian Posehn sues the Teej for using his likeness, but in a funny way. We resolve, as a community of Gheorghies, to be a part of the solution. At least, anyway, to come up with the solution and talk about it at length before giving up and talking about beer, music, and sports.

So on this final day of this altogether forgettable annum, may you enjoy some high-quality merrymaking, and prepare yourself for a long-awaited turning of the page. Me and mine, we're hunkering down to avoid all the sick people in our neighborhood and breaking out the fondue pots.

All the best to you and yours, and fuck off, 2014.