Monday, September 28, 2009

What the Kids Are Watching

From the creators of Better Know Your Minor League Franchise and Ceai Complet, a brand new Recurring Feature Destined to Stop Recurring.

As we age, some less gracefully than others (the entire G:TB editorial staff is in our thirties - for at least 6 more months), we find ourselves increasingly interested in how younger generations roll. A recognition of our mortality, perhaps, raging against a graying, balding, aching reality. Specifically, though, as it relates to our newest filler feature, we're focusing on a much younger generation.

According to my daughter, this is What the Kids Are Watching (I warn you in advance that this clip is NSFYS (Not Safe For Your Sanity) - if you press play, it will be in your head for the rest of the day, if not longer. Please proceed with caution.):


36 comments:

Whitney said...

A jockey-shorts-wearing bear who grabs his crotch and shows off his quarter-slot? That's for young kids?

(Yep, I'm old.)

T.J. said...

Where the hell are the cartoon Gummi Bears, dancing here and there and everywhere?

Shit, now I feel old.

T.J. said...

And to think, I planned on starting today with this video instead:
http://bit.ly/2ltoYl

zman said...

Live blogging from dmv. Bitter.

rob said...

whit, if this is the worst thing our kids find out about on the school bus, our challenges are few. but i don't think it will be.

Geoff said...

I haven't shaved since September 21. Today is my first day back at work sporting the "beard." Generally the reaction has been a lot of disgusted looks and one person saying "well, it does make you look older." I put "beard" in quotation marks because I really just have a goatee and a neck beard going...as I can't grow anything more than that. I'm seriously toying with the idea of not shaving until the end of October...because, you know, fuck everyone...

mayhugh said...

Geoff - a neck beard is just a cry for help, like gambling in foreign currency (as I attempted in Frankfurt Airport on Friday). You need to at least take care of the neck and then in terms of anything else that may/can grow, let the chips fall where they may.

Geoff said...

Yeah, the neck beard is really repulsive. Wearing a suit with this mess all over my face and neck kind of makes me look like a homeless guy that got a makeover.

zman said...

Has anyone looked at the box score for yesterday's Giants/Bucs game? The Bucs played insanely poor football (sorry Mark).

Is Madison Hedgecock a real name? Or did he make it up using the porn star name formula? If he married Jimmye Laycock's daughter, would she hyphenate? Should she?

Geoff said...

I'm still holding out hope that Bobby Phils daughter will marry Albert Pujols and then hyphenate.

Samantha said...

Rob, our standards might be lower than Whit's; remember, no school buses for his kids, instead they don their uniforms and go off to Catholic school each day. The nuns ensure a higher standard, I'm guessing. The behavioral results of the two approaches are generally obvious when all our kids get together. :)

Mark said...

Boooo kids!

rob said...

it's okay, mark. it's a gtb feature, which means the odds of seeing it again are less than 50%. unless bert & ernie are involved.

rob said...

5 of the top 7 teams in the sports network division 1-aa poll are from the caa. ridiculous. we should secede.

T.J. said...

So if you've already had James Andrews perform TWO surgeries on your paper maiche arm, and you're going back for a third, that's a bad thing right?
-Chad

Jerry said...

As long as we get 5 playoff spots, it's not too bad. There was a time where the committee was placing a soft cap at 4 teams, but they seem to have realized the error in their ways.

Mark said...

I wsn't booing your feature Rob. Just booing kids in general.

Whitney said...

Tribe has all 4 of the other Top 7 CAA teams on their schedule. Quite the gauntlet. Richmond has the easiest of the schedules, with only JMU as a difficult road opponent and no game against UNH, but it will be no cakewalk for any of those teams.

Unknown said...

that should be a pretty easy game for jmu....dukes are nice

T.J. said...

I'm so glad to see that our president has time to go to Denmark to shill for the Olympics to be in Chicago...in 2016. Seems like a good use of his time.

zman said...

Stuart Scott and Steve Young appear to be wearing $2000 suits. Matt Millen looks like his ensemble fell off the back of a TJ Maxxx truck.

T.J. said...

Adrien Zmed and TJ Maxx to you sir.

T.J. said...

So Jay Mohr gets a sitcom? And Kelsey Grammar, again? Has anyone dialed up Judd Hirsch?

zman said...

Some poor kid at USC dropped the bar on his neck while benchpressing. His spotter is in trouble. My ghetto-ass high school had safety bars on the benches to prevent that. Why doesn't USC?

T.J. said...

Dallas blows.

T.J. said...

I told ya.

rob said...

romo blows, too. dude has no discipline whatsoever.

T.J. said...

Berman...shut. The. Fuck. Up.

zman said...

I appreciated early on when they acknowledged they have a minimum quota of "wildcats" to say during the broadcast.

T.J. said...

Zoltan hates "wildcats" more than Kurt Russell.

T.J. said...

I hope someone is awake to root for a 14-13 Panthers win with me...

T.J. said...

Soylent Green is People...People I Tell Ya...

And seriously, John Fox, you might want to pressure Tony Romo just a tad.

T.J. said...

Jake, you suck donkey balls.

T.J. said...

Jonathan Moxon is a better QB option for the Panthers.

T.J. said...

I'm sorry, some dude on USC has a three week weight lifting injury? Seriously? Did the bus full of people kill his back? Maybe the caber toss?

T.J. said...

Whoa Matt Millen, shut the fuck up...just cause its 12am doesn't mean people ain't up...the Panthers are NOT a good team. Matt, tell me why they are? Hmmmm, I don't hear an actual reason...