Back like Cooked Crack!

The college football gods are indeed a strange and fickle group. Today, shortly after arriving home from the purchase of my 2008 gameday Gator t-shirt (Yes, I buy a new one each year. Yes, I'm aware how fucking gay this must seem). I discovered that the water heater in my home (which for some reason is located within my home instead of my garage) had begun to leak profusely. Water was everywhere. I spent the next 40 minutes soaking up water in my laundry room, kitchen and bathroom with every towel in my house as well as a number of rarely worn t-shirts (making sure to not use any of the previous seasons' Gator tees, natch). While this was both infuriating and a tremendous inconvenience, I quickly realized that it was simply the college football gods showing me a little unconventional love. You see, many weeks ago I had committed to attend a poker night with my girlfriend in support of her friends christian youth group. (Yes, I too find it odd that poker/gambling somehow equals Jesus' unending love but I digress). Of course, when I committed to said Poker Night I was completely and totally unaware that it would be taking place on the first night of the most glorious season known to man...College Football season. But, now that the water heater has become such a pressing issue here at the homestead, it appears as though we'll be unable (sigh) to attend the aforementioned Christian Poker Night. Let's see your "god" get you out of unwanted commitments so quickly and easily as mine did, Christians.

Anywho, with that long winded explanation out of the way, I'll be settling in tonight to watch one of my former dieties, Stephen Orr Spurrier, take on NC State (aka Where QBs go to die). Its a pretty solid game for a Thursday night debut (better than Stanford v. Oregon on the ESPN2) and we're likely to get a few highlights from the Jackson St.-Georgia Tech game going on in Atlanta this evening as well (crosses fingers that one of the highlights will feature Ryan Perriloux shooting an GT defender whilst rolling out on a play action pass...C'mon, don't act like you'd be shocked).

I wont pretend to know much about NC State aside from the fact that no QB has been able to last even one full season as the unquestioned starter since the salad days of one Philip Rivers and that they're coached by Tom O'Brien. However, I know plenty about South Carolina and I'll give you a few players to watch this evening as you merrily toast the kickoff of the 2008 season.

Jasper Brinkley: One of the best LBs in America, also probably the most underrated, due to last year's early season knee injury that resulted in a medical redshirt. He's huge (6'2", 275), fast and plays with great instincts. He also has a brother named Casper, which has to count for something. Seriously, the guys a monster. Keep your eyes on #52 tonight.

Emmanuel Cook: Cook is a South Florida kid who was passed over by all the Florida schools and many SEC programs due to his lack of prototypical size and speed despite great numbers on both sides of the ball (He rushed for over 2,000 yards as a senior in high school). He's been a starter at SC since his first game and along with Brinkley has been a staple of the Gamecock D since his arrival.

Kenny McKinley: The best and most important player on the SC offense. He was a 1st team All-SEC selection last year and is on a number of preseason All-American lists. He's in the mold of many of Spurrier's past receivers (not very tall, more quick than fast, extremely good hands) and should put up monster numbers this year, provided that Tommy Beecher or Stephen Garcia can stay out of the HBC's doghouse long enough to establish some chemistry with McKinley. McKinley's as good a college receiver as there is this year and I'm betting he goes for 100+ yards and a touch tonight.

So there it is, the most one sided scouting report you've ever read. What can I say...I love the SEC and think the ACC should be viewed on the same plain as the MAC or Mountain West in terms of credibility. I mean, Wake Forest is pick in the ACC this year? Fuck off. Hopefully, you'll join me in the comments at some point this evening to drink in the glorious return of college football and, of course, drink.