Chris Davis is currently mired in a 0-for-53 slump. That's a slump on steroids, frankly. But let's leave performance enhancers out of this post.
Pal, I know it sucks, but for the good of the internet (and the good of the Teej) I'm gonna need you to hit 0 for 69 next Saturday, April 20th. This will require the Orioles to bench Mr. Davis a few times over the next seven days, which seems like a proper move for a team theoretically trying to win games. Then I need them to insert him in the lineup against the Twins next Saturday night, and whiff so badly Boog's BBQ blows down.
Oh for 69, on 4/20. May the baseball internet gods smile down upon us.
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From the last comment stream . . .
ReplyDeleteWhitney: Also, I spent the morning at W&M as part of a Diversity & Inclusion group as the College looks to improve itself. (Yes, I know, I’m a white straight male without a significant disability. But I have insights, baby.)
So awesome. I used Whitney's full name on my Crucible quote quiz this year and several kids selected him as an answer. That's how white he is. Puritan white.
The name Whitney
ReplyDelete76% Rating
Gender Feminine & Masculine
Usage English
Pron. WIT-nee
Meaning & History
From a surname which was originally derived from a place name meaning "white island" in Old English. Its popular use as a feminine name was initiated by actress Whitney Blake (1925-2002) in the 1960s, and further boosted in the 1980s by singer Whitney Houston (1963-2012). Made super popular as a masculine name by bad assed blogger Whitney from Gheorghe: Blog.
I just received notification that I am officially a legal medical marijuana user in the state of Florida. Just as one of the local dispensaries has stocked up on smokable flower. Good times.
ReplyDeleteTo Whit’s last comment, I’m sure the sandwich and the beer in the can were nice, but they’re probably nicer at a table. Kinda gross.
ReplyDeleteThat joke does always make me chuckle. That and the expression, “I prefer it in the can.“
ReplyDeleteChris Davis not in the O’s starting lineup tonight.
ReplyDeleteFerrari plans to launch an SUV in 2022. Atrocious. Enzo is spinning in his grave.
ReplyDeleteThe humanity
ReplyDeleteThe Lamborghini minivan can’t be far off.
ReplyDeleteIt’s all coming together
ReplyDeleteLamborghini already sells an SUV and that almost makes sense, they started out selling tractors.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter’s SAT tutor was arrested for murder. Mildly unnerving.
ReplyDeleteWhoa. That’s something.
ReplyDeleteHampton Roads is loco!
ReplyDeleteThe Hoop Summit is one of my favorite basketball dork events. The rare highly competitive all star game.
ReplyDeleteCan we get a post on why Whitney hired Lori Loughlin’s SAT tutor? Because I’m currently in the standardized test zone.
ReplyDeleteMornin Gheorghies
ReplyDeleteyeah, we're gonna need a bit more detail on that one, whit.
ReplyDeleteDanimal, just saw your Insta post. We’re gonna need to work on your selfie-taking game
ReplyDeleteteej has serious reverse jinx powers
ReplyDeletethree hits for davis today. teej, write a post about my lack of dunking ability.
ReplyDeleteWHITNEY'S SAT TUTOR : MURDER
ReplyDeleteA. Whitney : beer
B Rob : Squirrel
C. TR : feminine canines
D. Teej : 1972 Citroen SM
E. Mark : tattoos
F. Zman : patent law
G. Good Mythical Morning : Whimsy
a w&m running back was murdered in norfolk this year?
ReplyDeleteMaaaaaaaagiiiiiiiiiic.
ReplyDeleteDave, pay attention
ReplyDeleteThe SAT tutor was sleeping in his autistic daughter’s room per standard when the wife invited a lover into her bedoir. The husband heard noise and thought it was a burglar and shot him. Murder in the 3rd degree.
ReplyDeletePreposterous series of events. That’s the story my daughter told me.
isn't Va a stand-your-ground state?
ReplyDeletethe durant/beverley subplot in the warriors/clippers series is serious fun.
ReplyDeleteBeverley is a motherfucker in the best way. I respect that level of jerk.
ReplyDeleteMornin Gheorghies
ReplyDelete