As we await the adventures of the upcoming Presidential administration, groups of reporters and media types decided that there are better models for delivering news and information. Traditional media, they say, isn’t up to the task of covering present society, particularly a past and future president whose m.o. essentially is to ravage the buffet table and belch into a megaphone. Newspapers and news organizations have been strip-mined of resources and staff. Many of those who are still at it chase profits and clicks at the expense of reporting. Corporate overlords, and investors, value their bottom line over an informed citizenry.
Niche media efforts have sprung up in response. Among the latest is an outlet called “The Contrarian,” which will be helmed by attorney and former U.S. diplomat and government official Norm Eisen and Washington Post columnist Jennifer Rubin, who walked away from her gig after sixteen years. “Our goal,” she told CNN, “is to combat, with every fiber of our being, the authoritarian threat that we face.”
On her way out the door, she also delivered this bouquet: “The Post, along with most mainstream news outlets, has failed spectacularly at a moment that we most need a robust, aggressive free press.”
The Post has impressively managed to irritate people both inside and outside the building for months. Gazillionaire owner Jeff Bezos nixed publication of an endorsement of VP Kamala Harris shortly before the election, reasoning that such political support presents the appearance of bias and that it likely doesn’t sway voters anyway. There was much in-house grumbling, and the Post lost a reported 250,000 digital subscribers in the aftermath of the decision.
Part of the spiked Ann Telnaes cartoon
Since then, Amazon, Bezos’s cash cow and primary source of his staggering wealth, contributed $1 million to Donald Trump’s inauguration fund (show of hands: who thinks the caterers and musicians see a dime of that money?). Amid the surge of plutocratic fawning over the next Prez, Post editors recently scuttled an editorial cartoon by Pulitzer winner Ann Telnaes showing Bezos and other business leaders supplicating themselves before the Orange Guy. The Post’s opinion editor called it a “sound editorial decision,” as recent columns and pieces had called out Bezos and others, and that the cartoon was “overkill.” Telnaes walked, as well.
The departure of a cartoonist and op-ed writer isn’t quite the United Mine Workers strike of the 1940s, or even the Amazon delivery hub drivers walkout last year. Nor does it begin to fix what ails journalism. Journalists can be tediously thin-skinned for folks whose job is to hold others to account. And they love some self-righteous posturing, particularly as it relates to their own work. That said, concerns within the profession about the tone of coverage and accountability are valid, starting with the guy at the top and those around him.
We live in anxious times, when an increasing number of people seek confirmation rather than information, and any unpleasant or inconvenient reporting is labeled “fake” or dismissed as biased. The Contrarian joins a handful of other outlets trying to gain traction in this fractured media landscape, such as The Bulwark and Zeteo.
The Bulwark is a conservative-leaning, anti-Trump outlet founded in 2019 by political strategist Sarah Longwell and longtime opinionators Bill Kristol and Charlie Sykes, who has since departed. Its website says it was founded “to provide analysis and reporting in defense of America’s liberal democracy. That’s it. That’s the mission.”
Zeteo, which comes from the Greek word meaning to seek or search, was launched last February by left-leaning rouser of rabble Mehdi Hasan, a British-American journalist and author with stints at Al Jazeera, MSNBC and The Guardian. It promises independent and unfiltered journalism. Both sites feature veteran, respected heavy hitters as correspondents and contributors. Both have some free content but are subscription sites, and they hope folks will spring for the full menu.
One problem with the harrumphing and torch waving among the niche sites and start-ups is that they’re planting flags as much as committed to providing relevant information. They report and gasbag through their own filters and are unlikely to appeal to anyone who isn’t already in their camp. It's increasingly difficult to find unbiased news and opinion sites, though I’d argue that some degree of bias is inherent in the process. The Nation, MSNBC, the New York Times and Washington Post skew left. Fox News, the National Review, Wall Street Journal, Newsmax skew right. Closest to centrist or middle-of-the-road might be outlets such as the old, reliable Associated Press, Christian Science Monitor, the BBC, Reuters and Forbes.
One interesting addition is 1440, a news site that pulls from numerous sources and bills itself as “curated by humans, not algorithms.” It’s focused on fact-based pieces, not opinions. Its name is a nod to Gutenberg’s first mechanical printing press, which he built in the year (approximately) 1440, and the fact that there are 1,440 minutes in a day; the site’s honchos pledge not to waste people’s time with filler and opinions. A noble aim, for sure, though I think the next four years will require some distractions from whatever fresh guano crosses our paths. Vigilance and goofballery in equal measures. Buckle up.
And away we go, friends, for a whirlwind tour of last year's content, and what's always my favorite post to write. In 2024, we started fast, finished with a flourish, and were reasonably consistent in the middle (except for July. We're gonna have a talk with July). We wrote a lot about our usual suspects, but we added a pop-up baseball blog for several weeks in September and October, and 2024 MVP OBX Dave reliably chimed in with high-quality musings on a broad range of subjects, including sports and media, and media about sports.
To illustrate the months this year, we chose to feature Minneapolis Public Radio The Current's top 11 songs of 2024 in reverse order, so you get some formatting break and some cool tunes. You're welcome.
Z's original car post triggered a run on automative efforts. Like this one. And this. This, too.
Posted about stuff I'd take with me if I had to. Which touched off a mini-run. Here's z's version. In light of the current conflagration in L.A., it all seems a bit melancholic.
The Twelfth Day of Gheorghemas 2023 started on January, 31, 2024. And it was an accurately-labeled extravaganza, taking up a full 12 posts. One of the best uses of postcount in recent memory.
For a month with the fewest posts (13) since April 2023, we managed some heft. Multiple robust explorations of various topics. And a Muppet post. Well played, lads.
As God is my witness, a late Thanksgiving meant the last post of the first 11 months was a classic.
And that's all we wrote, friends. A rollicking good year full of joy, whimsy, baseball, tunes, and laughter, with a soupçon of agitated ranting and melancholy. I am, as always, biased, but I do believe we packed more quality into our 200 posts this year than usual. Maybe we're getting the hang of this blogging thing. In any case, love y'all. Here's to 200 more in 2025.
As we all recall, Day 11 is a bit of a behemoth, so while we eagerly anticipate its arrival, it may take a few more days while robbie reviews the Year du Gheorghe. In the meantime... football!
The college football playoff has been everything everyone most people wanted. (Fans of Oregon, Georgia and a few others... sorry 'bout your bad luck play.)
Irish vs Buckeyes. Danimal vs Buckles. Flynn vs Evan. Catholics vs... Tree Nuts.
Get some. Irish haven't beaten the Bucks since FDR's first term. Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again, and the Irish have a man like that in Riley "Don't Call Me Booger Ray" Leonard.
They don't call me the best color guy in the game for nothin'.
Okay, now on to the pros!
Those of you who pay any attention may have noticed a pattern in my gambling. The pattern? I'm terrible. Awful. A travesty. Always wrong. Okay, well, almost always. In fact, FanDuel considered shuttering its doors after giving up a bet like that to me.
Other than that, I've lost many, many bets there. Luckily, I don't gamble high dollar amounts.
That said, I gots a funny feeling about my picks for the playoffs this weekend. Go All In!
Here you go, your 1st Round NFL Playoff Picks brought to you by my betting alter ego, Slapdash Drunkenwager . . . and Alcoa.
Alrighty, here comes Slapdash with his picks!
Greetings sports fans, and welcome to another edition of What the hell is he thinking, I mean my weekly football picks!
This week we're reaching way way back using the flux capacitor and 1.69 gigawatts of mental energy. A salute to the NFL stars of Slapdash's youth. Yep, placing wagers based on complete irrelevance. Couldn't be worse than my usual analysis.
Chargers (-3) @ Texans
Back when Slapdash was a kid, the Chargers had Danny Fouts and his cannon, Chuck Muncie and his specs, Wes Chandler and his wheels, and Charlie Joiner and his Hall of Fame cool. But they also had a little guy named Kellen Winslow who brought his badassed guts. Air Coryell. And for a couple of years, up until 1980, they had The O.C. named Joe Jackson Gibbs. Not shoeless, he commanded a high-flying offense.
Meanwhile... when Slapdash was a kid, the Texans were not a team. Oh, they had been a team. In Dallas. Who, after one crap season, moved to Baltimore to become the Colts. Ohhhh, Baltimorons, you stole someone's team and then got all cranky when the Mayflowergate happened in '84. Slapdash has said it before and he'll say it again, that Mayflower Van Lines still has zero presence in Baltimore and Howard County, MD is hilarious and awesome.
There was, though, a Houston team in my youth... you know them...
They had a fella named Bum runnin' the show. They had a bigger fella named the Tyler Rose runnin' through people. And keepin' on footwear, they had a fella for a few years, up until 1980, called White Shoes.
But they were Oilers. These are Texans. And though these Chargers are in Lose Angle-leez rather than San Dieeego, they're still the same old cHargers!
Chargers cover.
Steelers @ Ravens (-9.5)
Another nomenconundrum here, folks! Weren't no Ravens back when! Bal'mer was the Colts, and boy did they stink back then. Johnny U and Art Donovan were distant memories, and let's not mention the words John Elway or Indianapolis.
The Steelers were the Steel Curtain, aging though they were. Nobody dominated the NFL in the 1970's like this franchise, and they wouldn't post a losing record until the middle of the next decade. And if I think about Pittsburgh vs. Baltimore in an NFL showdown, I think of two men.
L.C. Greenwood and Bert Jones.
Gotta go with L.C. Steelers and the points. (If you'd called Slapdash earlier this week, you could've gotten 10.5 like he did.)
Broncos @ Bills (-9)
Orange Crush defense led by Tom Jackson (pre-ESPN), Rubin Carter (not that one), Randy Gradishar, Lyle Alzado, and eventually Karl Mecklenburg, who it should be noted was actually one of the henchmen who attacked Nakatomi Plaza.
And yes, Craig Morton. And eventually... John Elway. Baltimore's bastard son.
Buffalo... well, Joe Ferguson? A backfield that also included Joe Cribbs, Roosevelt Leaks, Roland Hooks... Cribbs, Leaks, and Hooks is now an upstate residential contracting firm, but collectively they ran for over 1500 yards in 1981. The team was led in sacks that year by Ben Williams and Ken Johnson. I mean, that's what they are called after having gone into witness protection, right?
This was all before they dispensed with Coach K, I mean a coach named Kay Stephenson, and a few years later decided to hire a guy who had coached at William and Mary. No, not Sean McDermott, dummies! Marv Levy. Middling days.
Like or hate Elway and his mule smile, he wins this. Take the points. Broncos.
Packers @ Eagles (-5)
Forrest Gregg versus Dick Vermeil. Lynn Dickey versus Ron Jaworski. James Lofton versus Harold Carmichael. Eddie Lee Ivery versus Wilbert Montgomery.
Slapdash Style True Story: Stevie & Paul's hit tune "Ebony and Ivory" was originally "Eddie Lee Ivery."
Eddie Lee... Ivery / runs through Lions defenses... forcefully / side by side with Gerry Ellis / Jealous? / Fellas, you should be!
Here's what I remember of the Packers of Slapdash's youth:
But the pre-Comms lost that game 48-47 on a last-second FG by Jan "Translation: Nothing Ages in Norway" Stenerud-boy. Monday night game in October. It was insane. And the last time Washington would lose that season. Oh, until they went to Tampa for Super Bowl XVIII and, uh... Squirek-ed their pants. Fun fact: Dave Flynn went with his dad to that game. His pop used to play OL for Oklahoma back when that meant you were a lunatic beast. When the game went bad, and it went very, very bad, his dad got in a fight with a loudmouth Raider fan while 13-year-old Flynn sat there and sipped his Sprite and wondered what was next.
This is what the Eagles of the old days makes me think of:
Celebrate good times, come on. If you're a Philly fan. (But they lost in the Super Bowl that year as well.)
If you compare those two plays, and believe me I have or my name's not Slapdash Drunkenwager, you gotta fly Eagles fly. I will now flush my fingers in the toilette for having typed that. Ewwwww.
Take the Birds giving points.
Commanders @ Buccaneers (-3)
Well, once again the durn name changes throw ol' Slapdash off, but this time it was for a purty good reason. Ask Mike Schur; he dedicates a goodly chunk of his book to that old name and dunk-boothing Daniel Snyder repeatedly and comically. Good shit.
So Washington and Tampa from the olden days of the Carter (RIP, sweet prince) and Reagan years has one bad mofo thing in common. Doug Williams. Remember him? He was awesome. Channeling the CF Show now? Let's go, Slapdash.
So, other than that? Well, in the early 1980's it was all Washington, baby. Riggo! Rev up the Diesel! Vroom, vroom, vroom! More nicknames than a Berman family reunion. Hogs, Smurfs, Fun Bunch, etc. Actually, back in the late 70's when the Bucs leapt up from the dreary beginnings of the McKay/Spurrier era...
"Coach, what do you think about your team's execution?" Head Coach John McKay: "I'm in favor of it."
...and made it to the NFC Championship game in '79, Washington was known as the Deadskins. 'Twixt George Allen and Joe Gibbs was Jack Pardee and Pardee Par Par on a the best days. Double bogey city on the rest. Anyway, you take the good ('79 Bucs, '83 pre-Commanders), you take the bad (other years), you take 'em both and there you have a fargin' close game! This one's gonna be tight. And whoever can channel their best Doug E. Fresh Williams will win.
If you're getting 3 in a game that may be won by a single point, Slapdash takes the points. Commanders.
Vikings @ Rams (+2.5)
Home dog! Speaks to the silly system the NFL now has. Alrighty, then. Minnesota and L.A. It's like Lakers history month.
Fran Tarkenton! Tommy Kramer! Pat Haden! Vince Ferragamo! Bud Grant! John Robinson! Ahmad Rashad! Phylicia Ayers-Allen! Eric Dickerson! Rec Specs!
Slapdash is tired from not doing enough slapdash prognosticating and thinking too hard about these games.
Vikings and rams both have horns. They even hang out together. Maybe even forge a relationship and perform the physical act of lovely on cold, wintry nights like it will be Monday. They belong together.
So why are they fighting?
Minnesota lost 4 Super Bowls in the 1970's. One to the Steelers. The Rams lost one... to the Steel Curtain in January of 1980. They couldn't win one in L.A. so they said meet me in St. Louis. They should commiserate. But... L.A. won a few years ago.
Slapdash says feel sorry for the Vikings, Bud, Fran, Ahmad, Steve Dils, the guy who traded the whole world for Herschel, and everyone freezing in Minnesota.
Take the Vikings giving a few. Do to the rams what you've always done to their kind, ye freebooting rovers of Norseland.
There you go. When you cash in big, like Slapdash Drunkenwager big, gimme a call and I'll let ya buy me a coldie.
The pages of the Gheorghian calendar turn slowly this year, but they turn nonetheless. We move closer to closing our blogyear as I exercise some editorial prerogative to offer some show and tell from my recent vacation.
Our trip from Virginia to Florence was uneventful, as these things go. IAD to Charles de Gaulle in Paris, a brief layover, and a 90-minute flight to Italy. Little did we know at the time that the return would prove far more vexing. What follows is a rough chronological review of the highlights of a wonderful week.
We stayed at a hotel called La Scaletta in the Oltrarno district, a mixed residential/restaurant/retail area near the Medici family's Palazzo Pitti. The hotel itself is housed in a 15th century townhome, its warren of rooms and hallways a testament to the challenges of retrofitting centuries-old infrastructure for modern purposes. But the staff was exceptional, the rooftop bar a wonderful vantage point (as we'll later see), and the location close enough to the action to suit us but far enough away to allow for some breathing room.
That great staff recommended a spot for our first Florentine meal at Trattoria 4 Leoni, about 100m from the hotel. I had something called Fiocchetti di pera in salsa di taleggio e asparagi, which is ghost-shaped (think a stuffed round "head" with a flowing cape) pasta stuffed with pear in a cheese sauce. Outrageously good, and a strong foreshadowing for the remainder of a week spent eating and drinking well.
Our hotel was a mere 400m or so from the fabled Ponte Vecchio, the only bridge in Florence spared from destruction by retreating Nazis in WWII. Legend has it that Adolf Hitler himself made the decision not to destroy the historic span, though recent research suggests it may have been the work of a brave shop assistant who disabled bombs intending harm.
The bridge is built up on both sides with shops selling all manner of leather, gold, art, and trinkets. It's often so crowded that it's hard to know that one is crossing the Arno River. There's a covered, windowed hallway above the bridge that the Medicis used to travel above the hoi polloi from their castle in the Oltrarno to their place of business in the old town.
In the light, it's worth crossing the Ponte Vecchio once, but unless you enjoy a good throng, better to use one of the parallel bridges on either side.
At night, though, at least during this festive season, the bridge was lit in all manner of splendid projections by light coming from the Uffizi. On New Year's Eve, as we waited for friends to get to town, my wife and I sat outside on the deck of Signorvino (that's Mr. Wine, to you Yanks) and watched the show.
The city of Florence, given its history and its amazing collection of artistic and architectural wonders, leans to the touristy in some places. Even so, there are a handful of things that must be done.
On our first full day in town, we had a splendid lunch of pizza and wine in the shadow of the Duomo, which we chased with a few hours at the Galleria della Academia, where we saw this fella:
Pictures really don't tell the whole story. That is one impressive work of art. Its scale is immense, and it looks great from a distance as well as up close. It's a classic for a well-deserved reason.
We also saw a bunch of Renaissance religious art, as well. In general, a lot of that sort of reliquary is a bit thematically redundant - there's only so many ways one can depict Christ's agony and resurrection - but I did find myself drawn to a couple of pieces that stood out for their color and character.
I was drawn to the crisp colors. And the fact that this Jesus seems to be the inspiration for 'Dogma'.
This is St. Jerome. He seems fierce. And red.
My wife's best college friend Lori and her boyfriend Richy live in Madrid. They joined us on Tuesday evening. We celebrated New Year's Eve with dinner at the hotel and drinks on the hotel's rooftop bar. It was among the more unique celebrations I've experienced, with the sounds of cathedral bells pealing mixed with the explosive percussion of fireworks from across town.
I knew we'd see a ton of amazing art at galleries. I was not prepared for the amount of public sculpture on display, nor the beauty of Florentine architecture. Across the old city, you can't swing a cat without hitting a remarkable work of art. I'm not sure why you're swinging a cat, freak.
Check these out, from just one location, the Piazza di Santa Croce:
And this, the Cathedral of Santa Maria del Fiore, the third-largest cathedral in the world and the home of The Duomo. Like The David, photos don't necessary capture the scale of the thing, nor the brilliant white, pink, and green marble. It's something.
After a couple of days in town, we took a bus into Tuscany. We hit a little fortress village called Monteriggioni, did a walking tour of Siena, visited a winery, and closed our day in a small town called San Gimignano. Far too many neat things to catalogue, but here are a few:
This and the next are from Siena's spectacular (and unfinished) cathedral
In San Gimignano, and unexpected superlative!
It's a *really* small village.
You kinda gotta do the Uffizi on your first visit to Florence. It's one of the world's legendary museums. I'm glad we did it. I kinda wish we had tasers. For the people that don't know how to fucking museum. Really tame tasers, mind you. Don't wanna injure anyone. But if you're stepping in front of a crowd to take a selfie with The Birth of Venus, you should be tased. I don't make the rules. I'm sure my man Botticelli would agree.
We took another trip out of town to visit the little historic village of Fiesole. It's about 5km north of Florence, up a steep hill. The views are amazing.
And this story, which will amuse you as well as offer a bit of a glimpse into how distracting all of the things in a foreign place can be. Something that pleasantly surprised me about Florence was how many dogs one sees every day. Florentines love their hounds - you see them on the streets out for walks by the dozens every day. So after nearly a week missing my own pup and seeing all of these good doggos, I was in need off a pooch to pet.
We were walking in Fiesole and stopped to visit the ruins of a Longobard (pre-Roman) village. The ruins were tucked into an apartment complex, and the grounds doubled as a park for locals. A young (say mid-twenties) woman walking a little doodle of some sort came near us, and the puppy walked towards me. I asked if I could say hi to the dog, and the woman told me I could. Our group chatted with her while I played with the dog, and then we parted.
A few moments later, my wife said, "that's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen". To which I could legitimately answer, "I didn't even notice!" I don't know if my wife believed me, but it's true.
One of the most special events of our week came on our last full day. A friend and former next-door neighbor from home is a lover of Florence. She studied there during college, and has returned multiple times with her family. We bumped into her at the local farmer's market a month or so before we went and she recommended we book a cooking class at Accidental Tourist.
Malja and Marco are a couple who run the business from their family's 900 year-old villa atop a hill in Collina, 15 minutes or so outside of Florence. They open their home to small groups that they teach to make pasta and then feed.
On the night we went, a couple from Australia and their three kids (12, 10, and 4) were staying in the villa's guest suite, and they joined us for the experience. American expat Steve Woodbury (he went to Italy 50 years ago to study music and never came back) was both our driver and our teacher, guiding us through making two different kinds of pasta and delivering this performance:
An epic meal, made better by the company, our group, the lovely Aussies (the father had a cup of coffee as an AFL professional), and the proprietors. The "bottomless" wine made by Marco's friend up the road served from a label-free bottle and as good as anything we drank all week didn't hurt.
Though it took us 66 hours to get home, my enthusiasm for Florence wasn't dampened in the least (Montreal is a different story altogether). A fella could get used to eating absurdly good pasta, drinking phenomenal wine, wandering centuries-old winding streets, sipping espresso, and probably most importantly, spending time with people he loves. Here's a selection of a few more images from a week well spent.
It's evident by now that TR has left the blogobuilding and isn't coming back. Much to our collective dismay. But we had a good run of about a dozen years with him on board here, and our G:TB architectural intern has excavated the annals (two n's) in search of unposted content authored by Rhymenocerous/TR. Enjoy the findings.
I don't listen to Maron's WTF podcast much any more, but I listened to almost every episode from '09 to '16. His career was in the toilet in '09, and his bitterness at life and peers' success was a topic of discussion. But what also came through was his open acknowledgment that this was not healthy, and his ongoing self-diagnosis/treatment. He laid out the fact that his anger toward others was really all about problems he had with himself.
Hearing Maron struggle over many years and claw his way to real career success had a therapeutic effect on me. I came to understand many of own personality quirks. I realized that I often made instantaneous snap judgments on people - almost always negative - that were just comparisons of that person relative to my personal shortcomings. It made me irrationally, quickly and deeply hate people. It was a tolerable defensive cocoon as I navigated life, but ultimately not a pathway to happiness. The fact that I started listening in '09, at a period of peak chaos in my life (second kid born, laid off, financial crisis, two mortgages) exacerbated these issues.
As I've aged and (hopefully) accrued (at least one iota of) wisdom, I think I have become a more open and receptive person who has shed these habits. But it's hard. It's really really really hard. My cocoon of spontaneous loathing is comfortable and cozy and I sometimes want to retreat there.
In the hopes of becoming a better TR, I'm listing some of my hot-button issues, in an effort to channel the Tao of Gheorghe more into my everyday life. I have listed 7 here. I have about 1,000 more. Maybe if I list them, I can avoid using them to instantaneously build reservoirs of vitriol towards strangers I've looked at for three seconds? Here are things that make me immediately judge people negatively.
1) Folks who chew gum with their mouth open - they look like a cow and are telling the world they have no manners. When I am forced to be near somebody doing this (on a train, standing in a line, etc), it drives me bat-shit crazy. And if there is noise associated with this bovine tendency, well I start delivering intense daggers of hatred toward that person, even if it's a 12 y/o girl.
2) Dudes who still pop collars on their golf shirts. While they may be trying to convey a "look at me, I'm adding some sizzle to my preppy look," it's like they are sending a signal to me to hate you. The "popped collar" had a run in the 80's. It came back in the early aughts. Let it go. Forever.
3) People who speak loudly into their cell phones. I had a five-year run of yelling at strangers on trains when they would do this. Thankfully, my yelling helped establish a societal norm on this, at least on NJ Transit trains. This now happens much less frequently and I haven't barked at a stranger in probably three years.
4) Couples who sit on the same side of a table at a restaurant when it's just the two of them eating. I think this has been mentioned here already. The only acceptable reason for this (in my warped head) is if the guy is trying to get to third base between courses. When I see this I assume it is being done b/c the wife keeps the man's gonads in her purse. If you do this, there's a chance you are not an awful person, but it is slim.
6) Guys who order alcoholic drinks with diet soda. There are lots of reasons why this makes sense for a person to do, but if you do it, my first thought is to think you are a pussy, no matter how much you love your "Skinny Pirate."
7) Guys who tuck in their shirts at the gym. This is an utterly nonsensical issue I have. I feel like guys who tuck in shirts are probably upstanding folks. But I think of them as half a man when I see it.
Clearly, I have some problems. But admitting them may be the first step to forgiveness.
While the tiny dictator is roaming around Tuscany with the Maestro and Teejus is getting his hula on at the luau, someone has to step up with some filler. Might as well be some music filler.
So here we are, waiting for the end of Gheorghemas and the launch of new insightful content / dipshittery in 2025.
The ruggers among us might be waiting for someone to shout harmoniously:
Whyyyyyy are we waaaaaaiting?
with a lewd rejoinder or two.
But more of you are simply waiting in the G:TB waiting room (the previous post's Comments section) for Gmas to conclude. Patiently. You are a patient lot of boys and girls.
Oh, but we're also all awaiting the impending, infernal inauguration to launch us into Limbo. You know, the one without the catchy music and the horizontal sticks. Be as nimble as you want, Jack, but you're proper rogered come January 20, lad. Or maybe not. Stay tuned.
Anyway, thanks to the estimable Mr. KQ, who offered me a nice little holiday gift via Insta last week, we have the right soundtrack for today. With guitars! And video.
We pointed you to this a couple of years ago, a Cleveland-based School of Rock performance where some brilliant youth issued a cover of one of the finest punk anthems ever conceived. Amazingly good.
But now, let's travel back in time. Way, way back to December 29, 1988.
In a D.C. music box called the Wilson Center.
To the original.
From the originators.
Let's do this.
I say it again, punk rock will be a salve for the pain of the next chapter.
College football is in the midst of a sea change that includes mega-conferences and greater player empowerment in the form of approved payments and the transfer portal. Add to that the first year of the 12-team FBS playoff, and this season has been unlike any other.
I’m old enough to remember when discussion of a playoff of any sort was off the table. A playoff would somehow devalue the regular season. It would be onerous for the, ahem, student-athletes, because it would require several more games and extra physical and perhaps academic burdens. This was always transparent nonsense, since FCS and D2 and D3 football and every other NCAA sport conduct playoffs; it was simply a way to preserve the FBS bowl structure, a patronage setup that enriched a select few and has long been indefensibly quaint or quaintly indefensible -- whichever you prefer.
As in most areas, however, concerns and resistance magically melt away when the amount of money available usurps that of the old regime. A two-team selection became four and now 12 as TV contracts worth billions will be distributed mostly among the power conferences and schools. As for a devalued regular season, viewership and interest appear to be just fine.
Anyone who has checked out on college football due to the present money grab is 1) rare and 2) hasn’t paid attention for quite some time.
All that said, here are nine games for perusing that helped define a compelling season:
Memphis 20, Florida State 12. Sept. 14.
Florida State’s preseason No. 10 ranking was already a memory, after losses to Georgia Tech and Boston College to begin the year. Coach Mike Norvell’s loss to his former program, the one that landed him the FSU gig, and a drop to 0-3 cemented the fact that there are structural problems in Tallahassee. Memphis limited the Seminoles to 37 yards rushing and less than 250 total yards, this after both Ga. Tech and BC controlled the line of scrimmage. Florida State finished 2-10, its only victories against Cal and FCS Charleston Southern, while Memphis of the AAC went 10-2. The Seminoles’ notoriously entitled and impatient booster base would like to make a change, but Norvell signed a contract extension after winning the ACC last season. His buyout is $64 million if he leaves, according to USA Today, and he would be owed 85 percent of that if he is fired. Expensive lesson.
James Madison 70, North Carolina 50. Sept. 21.
Most power conference programs have unsightly losses in their history. Goes with the territory. Some, however, are more damaging and telling than others. Venerable coach Mack Brown’s second stint at Carolina featured both successes and hiccups. But the Tar Heels’ performance against JMU, just two years into its status as an FBS program, was irredeemable. The Dukes hung 53 points on Carolina in the first half, with receivers running lonesome open for big plays, and totaled 611 yards. Brown himself called it “embarrassing.” Fast forward a couple months and as the Heels prepared for their finale against rival N.C. State, Brown said he planned to coach next season. UNC administration responded with ‘no thanks’ and said it would look elsewhere. Brown coached the finale, a disappointing 35-30 loss that again displayed the 6-6 Heels’ inability to finish, along with the harsh truth of major college coaching, that the Reaper eventually comes for them all. And when a school that made its athletic bones with basketball then went out and spent money to hire Bill Belichick, it conveys all you need to know about which sport calls the shots in college athletics.
Vanderbilt 40, Alabama 35. Oct. 5.
If you wanted a Sign of the Apocalypse, or simply an indication that college football has changed, you could do worse than this result. One of the biggest upsets in SEC history caused a scramble through the record books and made a folk hero of Vandy QB Diego Pavia, who had 309 yards of total offense and stared down the No. 1-ranked Crimson Tide’s every challenge. It was Vandy’s first win against ‘Bama in 40 years and first ever against a top-five team. The Commodores were 0-60 against the top five previously, with 50 of those losses by double figures. Nick Saban said prior to the game that Vandy Stadium was the easiest road venue in the SEC, which successor Kalen DeBoer might dispute. Turned out that three losses, including the loss to Vandy and especially the late thump job to Oklahoma cost the Tide a playoff berth.
Oregon 32, Ohio State 31, Oct. 12.
Terrific showdown in the newly distended, geographically incongruous conference membership world. No. 2 vs No. 3. Seven lead changes, 963 yards of offense, big plays from primo players. Outcome wasn’t decided until Ohio State QB Will Howard, trying to get his team in position for a potential winning field goal, took off on a run in the final seconds but slid down as time expired. Howard passed for 336 yards and two TDs, while Oregon’s Dillon Gabriel, an Oklahoma transfer who replaced NFL draft pick Bo Nix, threw for 341 yards and two touchdowns and ran for another. The Ducks used that game as a springboard to an unbeaten regular season and No. 1 ranking, and moderated coach Dan Lanning’s tendencies to go for two, go for it on fourth down and let his imagination run untethered.
Indiana 56, Nebraska 7. Oct. 19.
The Hoosiers opened eyes with a 6-0 start and top-25 ranking under new coach Curt Cignetti but the schedule was tame. Nebraska was supposed to provide a test. They resemble the Cornhuskers of old in name only, though they entered 5-1 overall. They had some quality pieces, and were the only program in the nation not to have allowed a rushing touchdown. Indiana notched five rushing TDs, 215 yards on the ground, and forced five Nebraska turnovers. Cignetti has overseen an amazing turnaround with the program’s first 11-win season and a berth in the playoff after being picked to finish 17th in the 18-team Big Ten. The former JMU coach and one-time Nick Saban assistant doesn't lack confidence and provided one of the great press conference sound bites, at his intro presser. A reporter asked why he thought he could transform the Hoosiers’ dismal fortunes. He responded, “I win. Google me.”
Colorado 34, Cincinnati 23. Oct. 26.
Not a hugely dramatic result, more a sign of progress from the most visible guy in college football. The Buffs cleanly dispatched Cincy for their sixth win, making them bowl eligible for the first time since 2016 – not counting the COVID season of 2020. Coach Prime’s second-favorite child, or wherever Shedeur Sanders ranks in Dad’s present hierarchy, completed his first 15 passes and was 25 for 30 for 323 yards and two scores. Two-way star and future Heisman winner Travis Hunter had nine catches for 153 yards and a TD, and broke up four passes on defense. The Cincy win was part of a finishing stretch of five wins in their last six games and a 9-3 overall record. A year ago, Colorado started quickly in Deion’s first season but faded to 4-8, prompting some to wonder if he was all sizzle and no substance. He’ll have to replace Shedeur and Hunter, though it’s increasingly apparent that he wants to and is able to build a program.
SMU 48, Pitt 25. Nov. 3.
Who better to navigate the terrain of conference realignment, payments to players and easy player transfer than a Texas school with deep-pocketed donors who’ve had their noses pressed up against the window of Big Boy college football for 30 years? SMU took advantage of ACC discomfit, talked their way into the league and ran through it on their first lap. The Mustangs figured to be immediate contenders but their deconstruction of previously unbeaten and 18th-ranked Pitt confirmed that they are going to be a chore. They led 31-3 at halftime and cruised. Their transfer-heavy and presumably well compensated roster is upper tier, and head coach and offensive tinkerer Rhett Lashlee has a name that sounds like he could be the wealthy heir to a Memphis real estate fortune or a successful attorney with a dark secret on “Days of Our Lives.”
Arizona State 28, BYU 23. Nov. 23.
The Sun Devils’ march to the Big 12 Conference title game in their first year in the league featured this resume’ builder against 14th-ranked BYU. Coach Kenny Dillingham inherited a mess two years ago in the wake of the Herm Edwards failed experiment. After going 3-9 in the last year of the Pac-12 as we knew it, ASU was picked to finish last in the Big 12 but went 10-2, its best record in 25 years. The Sun Devils were led by all-purpose back and Super Mario Bros. character Cam Skattebo and a roster dotted with transfers. A Phoenix native, Dillingham (34) is one of the youngest head coaches in D1 and was previously offensive coordinator and QB coach at Oregon, Florida State and Auburn before landing his hometown gig.
Michigan 13, Ohio State 10. Nov 30.
We live in interesting times, when a coach who has won 87 percent of his games and 90 percent of his conference games is vilified because he is 1-4 against one particular opponent. Of course, it makes no sense. Sports, man. That it was a mind-blowing result in one of the nastiest, most heated rivalries in football is gas on the fire. The second-ranked Buckeyes face-planted, at home, in a game in which they were 21-point faves. Michigan entered 6-5 and had mostly scuffled along after losing coach Jim Harbaugh to the NFL and a slew of players from their national championship team. The Buckeyes and their $20 million roster couldn’t much run or pass and missed a couple of makeable field goals. Michigan threw for a grand total of 62 yards and two picks, yet won. The post-game dust-up at midfield, complete with pepper spray, wasn’t a good look, either. The only thing that might redeem OSU coach Ryan Day – emphasis on “might” – is a natty. No pressure.
Honorable Mention: Several Miami games, which highlight the value of a top-shelf quarterback, even just a one-year rental. Washington State transfer Cam Ward, whose NIL deal was reportedly in the $2 million range, elevated Miami back into the national discussion.
Texas-Texas A&M, which drove home the absurdity of shelving rivalry games because of competing conference interests. And for the Longhorns, even in an era of transfers and roster overhaul, there is still great value in continuity, development and an emphasis on line play. Texas' offensive and defensive lines are veteran groups that have been together for a few years and the cornerstone of what may be the nation's best overall roster.
Boise State-Washington State, in which the Broncos and primo back Ashton Jeanty (259 yards, 4 TD) dusted the former Pac-12 member near the start of an 11-game win streak that landed them in the playoffs. The bar is higher for non-power conference schools to make the playoffs, but the expanded field provides an avenue if the stars align.
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