Friday, March 29, 2019

I Need T-Shirt for My Bunghole

From whatever Google Alert TR has set up for this segment, I bring you this fine piece of cloth:



I know at least one guy (other than me) who would love this:


42 comments:

  1. If you're going to get a bidet/toilet combo you should get a Toto not this fugazi Tushy thing. Toto makes a seat that's easy to install--just remove the old seat, screw the new one in, connect it to the tank and plug it into an outlet. When we redid zbathroom I went whole hog and got a Toto with integrated bidet, heated seat, fan and filter for stench mitigation, and a dryer. I cannot say enough good things about it. As the title of the book goes, Everyone Poops, so make it a pleasant process and get an asswash toilet.

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  2. I am a patient boy
    I wait
    I wait
    I wait
    I wait

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  3. zman likes his toto so much that he often just goes in for an asswash and dry. just 'cause he can.

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  4. Everybody's movin, everybody's movin movin movin movin movin [their bowels].

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  5. On a hot summer day, yeah, I do wash and dry myself.

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  6. scene from suburbia this morning:

    my mom is in town visiting for the weekend. my kids don't have school, so they're both hanging around the living room. my daughter's dance instructor, jimmie (featured here previously in a very special gt:b episode) spends the night at our house on thursdays to save himself the 90-minute one-way trip home. i'm working from home because there's a water stain on our living room ceiling. and all of us are watching a plumber on a ladder with his head poked through the hole he's just cut in the ceiling and providing commentary. all the makings of a wacky network sitcom. working on the script now.

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  7. Sounds like some WB content.

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  8. pro tip: mash up some avocado with a little salt and a generous dollop of trader joe's zhoug and use it on a sandwich or bagel with bacon and egg. change your life. you're welcome.

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  9. Fugazi Friday in full effect. A good warm-up for Rootstone.

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  10. Zhoug looks like I word I should be familiar with but I had to google it. It sounds tasty.

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  11. nathan knight declared for the nba draft. we literally don't have enough scholarship players to field a team next year.

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  12. and zhoug is the shit. also seen it spelled as zug or shug.

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  13. so it's a show about nothing? a plumber fixes a water stain . . . that's a show! you should write it up and pitch it.

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  14. and our wacky multi-culti family unit says pithy things about nothing. boffo ratings.

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  15. tiger v. rory in the round of 16 at the wgc match play tomorrow. some happy suits at the pga tour.

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  16. Mike Brey looks turrible...

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  17. getting rootsy-themed dispatches from whitney. seems both in fine fettle. one in fine fiddle, i guess.

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  18. Was great to have Whitney and crew there last night. They arrived just in time for our song about a sultry maraca player ‘She Shook it on the Corner’.

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  19. I was wise enough to pick Texas Tech to make the final four. Unfortunately I did it in the bracket that had UNC winning it all, not the other one where I had Gonzaga winning it.

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  20. i see zed has been productive, bloggily-speaking. stand by for content.

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  21. carsen edwards is doing work

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  22. I was rooting for Gonzaga b/c their head coach has an uncanny resemblance to FoG:TB Major Tom.

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  23. Rob willed Kyle Guy into hitting shots via Twitter.

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  24. pretty proud of myself, mark. college basketball is fun.

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  25. jesus h christ on toast, but this is a fun game

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  26. This tournament’s subpar first weekend is forgiven.

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  27. Chris Webber is a dumpster fire in an otherwise epic game.

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  28. It sure was. To overcome a game like Edwards put on uva is impressive.

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  29. Bad coaching by Purdue to let Edwards play hero ball all night. Getting Cline some looks would only have created more space for Edwards.

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  30. I was not insignificantly overserved last night but I feel disproportionately good. Had the best Brussels sprouts I’ve ever eaten and some asparagus so now I have Brussels sprouts farts and asparagus pee. Avoid zbathroom for a few hours.

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  31. auburn is a dumb basketball team.

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  32. 100% of the time I see Tracy Wolfson on the TV, I immediately think “moley moley moley.” I should probably be more mature, but I’m not.

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  33. Auburn is in the Final Four.

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  34. the stylistic contrast between auburn and virginia will be fun to watch

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  35. gonzaga! god they screwed me. i actually had michigan beating duke in that bracket, and virginia. goddammit gonzaga.

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  36. Zero fucks to give about this final four. I can focus on my underachieving Yanks and my 9 y/o’s travel baseball team, which had a solid 7-0 win today.

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